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Previously on...
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a call was made.
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Sweetie, where are you?
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I don't wanna tell you.
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And if porter doesn't show up for
court, we're gonna lose our restaurant!
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A guy threatens to kill your son,
and that's what you're worried about?
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And as one love affair
blossomed, another...
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you were married before?
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She's dead.
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I want you out of my house.
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Withered on the vine.
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Mike delfino has to pay
for taking you away from me.
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I want him to lose what I lost.
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it had been a long
journey for david williams,
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and though it began years ago,
he remembered every step of it...
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walking outside his front door to find
a policeman with news of a car crash...
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running into the hospital only to be
told his wife and daughter had died...
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no! No! Let go of me!
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being dragged into a psychiatric
facility after his mental breakdown...
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no!
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Strolling into a hotel
weeks after being released
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and bumping into a beautiful blonde...
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marcng down the aisle with a
woman who, as it turned out,
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once lived on the same street with
the man who had killed his family.
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But his bride was now unhappy,
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and dave williams was worried that his
dream of revenge had been destroyed.
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Luckily for dave, fate was about
to take some steps of its own.
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Hey, dave! What's going on?
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Edie and I had a fight.
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I take it you're giving
her time to calm down?
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No, I think I'm looking for a place to
stay while she's looking for a lawyer.
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Oh, man, I...
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wanna say something helpful,
but all I got is "that sucks."
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That it does.
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So where are you headed?
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Oh, it's such a nice night, I thought
I'd walk to at motel on the interstate.
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Might as well enjoy the stars
while my life falls apart.
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it's getting late, and so, uh...
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hey, why don't you stay with me?
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Really? I, uh...
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I wouldn't want to impose.
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Dave, you saved my life.
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I owe ya.
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Well, now that you
mention it, I guess you do.
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come on in.
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And just like that, dave's
dream of revenge was salvaged...
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lead the way, roomie.
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And he started to feel his
long journey would soon be over.
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proudly presents
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sync:ßÇÈâÈâ
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Desperate
Housewives Season04 Episode12
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At 9:02 the next morning...
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edie williams began calling her friends to let
them know something humiliating had happened to her.
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By 9:06, her friends
had begun to arrive,
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just so they could
hear the juicy details.
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So he was married before.
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You don't kick a man out for that.
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no. but you do for never mentioning it.
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And especially when I
laid out mentire past.
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Emphasis on the word "laid."
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Exactly. Gaby gets it.
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Well, maybe they were only together a short
time, and she didn't mean anything to him.
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I doubt it, since he walks
around muttering to her ghost.
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You know what would lift your spirits?
We should all do a spa weekend.
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Yeah! Let's do that.
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Oh, I appreciate the offer, but I think
I'm better off gettinlost in my work.
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Well, maybe I can help you.
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Think you can rent my house out?
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What?
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Jackson got a teaching job at
the college in riverton, and...
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I'm going with him.
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Uh, wait, you're moving?
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I know it's sudden, but I
feel really good about this.
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And it's only two hours away, so it'll
still be like we're practically next door.
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I am so happy for you,
but we're gonna miss you.
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Oh, don't worry about
us. Jackson is so great.
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You are making the right choice.
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Absolutely. Come here, you!
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I can't believe you're leaving.
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When you're done here,
you wanna come do my lawn?
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Well, I figure since mike's letting me
crash here, it's the least I could do.
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Well, that's very nice... and brave.
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- Mike takes a lot of pride in his yard.
- Yeah.
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Look at his roses.
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Every time I walk by here,
I just want to steal one.
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- Here, let me cut you one.
- Oh, no. Couldn'T.
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He wouldn't like that.
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Hey, you. What's up?
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Not much. Got a call from dylan.
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Hehusband's traveling more for his business, and
she doesn't have anybody to help her with the baby.
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She's trying to pushe
to move out to baltimore.
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So, uh, what'd you say?
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Oh, just that I'd think about it.
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What do you think I should do?
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Well, she really needs your help.
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I guess you should help her.
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Well, I don't know that
she need it. Honestly?
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I think she's just lonely.
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of course... it would
be nice to be closer.
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But is that a good enough reason
to uproot my whole life here?
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What do you think?
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I'm not sure. It's up to you.
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I know. I just... thought
you might have an opinion.
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oh, shoot. I'm, uh, expecting
a call from a supplier.
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I'll, uh, I'll talk to you later.
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on second thought, I'm sure
he won't even notice it's gone.
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Of will require an updated irrigation
system, which I'm happy to take care of.
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Bree, you bought us a house. We
can't let you do all this, too.
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Nonsense! It's a small price to pay
to make your home more beautiful.
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- I insist.
-yes!
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It's gonna be here tomorrow.
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Orson, take it easy!
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impossible.
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Soon, I, the grillmaster, will
christen a brand-new barbecue.
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You're pretty excited about a grill.
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Oh, it's so much more
than that, young man.
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This is the prairiefire turbo.
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It's 122,000 btus of charbroiling power.
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Look out, cattle!
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You think you're excited? Just imagine
the salesman who overcharged you.
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Well, bree, I got a very good deal.
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He only thinks he got a good deal because the
salesman threw in one of those "kiss the cook" hats.
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And the temperature-sensing
rbecue fork.
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- Well, that sounds good.
- Yeah.
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Don't encourage him!
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Orson is a horrible negotiator.
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He's never met a sticker
price he didn't like.
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- Oh, no, bree,
that's-- - it's true.
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There's a reason the local car dealers send
you a fruit basket every christmas. W hush.
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bree, could you please not do that?
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Do... do what?
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It's just...
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when you talk to your husband that
way, it really pushes a button for me.
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My mom used to do that, and it, uh...
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drove my dad away.
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I think he was tired
of being emasculated.
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Did I mention it has a
rear-mounted rotisserie rack?
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what exactly are you saying, alex?
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I'm saying, if you're gonna be rude to your
husband, could you just not do it in front of me?
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So rotisserie, huh?
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Yeah. Good for chicken,
rolled roasts, legs of lamb.
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This thing is so advanced, I
could obably use it to make soup.
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I'm sorry. Daddy has to work.
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Carlos, what is going on?
You're gonna miss your plane.
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They're upset. They're
not used to me being away.
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Oh, for god sakes, girls. It's
not like he's going off to war.
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He's gonna be back tomorrow.
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Why can't daddy work here?
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Because daddy has a new job
that's gonna make us lots of money.
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We don't need lots of money.
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Hey, what did I say about
that kind of language?
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Look, gis...
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Daddy's gonna be home
tomorrow in time for dinner.
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You can call me whenever youant. Okay?
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And the best part is you get to
spend a whole day with just mommy!
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heoh, llo, mr. Fishmanan.
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I'm coming in. Watch the wheels.
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Boy, you just had to
put a rug here, huh?
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Uh, is everything okay?
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It's about your damn son.
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- Porter?
- How the hell do I know?
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He's got red hair and he's got a face you just
wanna slap, and he's driving my sister crazy!
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What are you talking about?
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The retirement home.
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Your kid has been staying
in your mom's room.
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What?
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Muriel thought he was just visiting,
but he's been there for a week.
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00:10:01,380 --> 00:10:05,380
Now the rules clearly state...
no visiting after dark.
169
00:10:05,630 --> 00:10:08,960
Tom, I know where porter is.
He's hiding at my mother'S.
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00:10:08,970 --> 00:10:12,040
Oh, hiding, my ass. He's not
hiding. He's living there.
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He even stole my sister's orange juice.
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I'll take re of it. Thank you.
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Call bob. Tell him we can
make the hearing tomorrow.
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Nobodyan sleep there because he's
got that tv blaring all night long.
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00:10:22,200 --> 00:10:25,050
Look, tom, I can't
talk now. Just call bob.
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I'm going over there now. Okay. Bye.
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00:10:27,220 --> 00:10:28,530
parker, I'm gonna be back in an hour.
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Mr. Fishman, thank you so much.
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well, don't just stand there.
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00:10:39,140 --> 00:10:41,810
Make me a sandwich!
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Uh, one more thing. Could you see
about having the basement cleared out?
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Yeah, e last time we went down there,
it was filled with mildewed boxes.
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Oh, I'll take care of that.
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There's nothing worse than
having old junk around.
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Edie!
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Case in point.
187
00:11:07,650 --> 00:11:10,000
edie?
188
00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:12,630
edie! Do you not hear me?
189
00:11:12,640 --> 00:11:14,710
Yeah, I heard you.
190
00:11:14,730 --> 00:11:17,090
Why do you think I kept walking?
191
00:11:17,650 --> 00:11:20,800
Looks like the mailman switched
our mail again. Do you have mine?
192
00:11:20,810 --> 00:11:25,070
Yep. T's in my garbag come by
and grab it at your convenience.
193
00:11:25,370 --> 00:11:28,010
What is wrong with you?
194
00:11:30,830 --> 00:11:36,130
I asked everyone over this morning because I had
this huge thing to share about kicking my husband out,
195
00:11:36,140 --> 00:11:41,300
and you prance in with your, "me and
jackson are moving to a fairy castle."
196
00:11:41,330 --> 00:11:42,390
I'm sorry.
197
00:11:42,420 --> 00:11:47,030
I thought we gave your latest breakup
the three seconds of shock it deserved.
198
00:11:47,060 --> 00:11:48,720
Get the hell out of here.
199
00:11:48,740 --> 00:11:50,840
Gladly.
200
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:56,640
- what have you done?
- nothing. It's locked.
201
00:11:57,770 --> 00:11:58,990
do you have a key?
202
00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:01,300
In my purse.
203
00:12:02,340 --> 00:12:04,320
Which I left in the kitchen.
204
00:12:04,330 --> 00:12:06,300
Does anyone know you're here?
205
00:12:06,310 --> 00:12:07,890
No.
206
00:12:09,060 --> 00:12:13,250
- Help!Get me out of here!
- Somebody help me!
207
00:12:16,189 --> 00:12:18,479
juanita, it's time for your bath.
208
00:12:18,509 --> 00:12:19,909
I'm watching my movie.
209
00:12:19,929 --> 00:12:21,219
You've seen it a hundred times.
210
00:12:21,249 --> 00:12:24,229
She loses her shoe, the prince
finds it--end of story. Let's go.
211
00:12:24,239 --> 00:12:27,119
I'll go when I'm ready.
212
00:12:30,749 --> 00:12:34,579
- hey, it's not finished!
- It is for you. Now move!
213
00:12:36,309 --> 00:12:38,829
Juanita solis, I am not kidding.
214
00:12:40,529 --> 00:12:44,749
Okay. That does it. Juanita.
215
00:12:47,259 --> 00:12:51,489
If you think I'm not gonna drag you
to the throom, you are sadly mistaken!
216
00:12:51,929 --> 00:12:53,009
You're never gonna make it.
217
00:12:53,039 --> 00:12:54,149
Oh, yes, I will.
218
00:12:54,169 --> 00:12:57,469
My rage is fueling me in
ways you can't imagine.
219
00:12:58,989 --> 00:13:01,409
what's wrong?
220
00:13:02,029 --> 00:13:04,559
My rage just needs to catch its breath.
221
00:13:12,699 --> 00:13:15,679
okay. Okay.
222
00:13:16,069 --> 00:13:20,749
I am willing to forget this entire incident
if you just go jump in that bathtub right now.
223
00:13:20,759 --> 00:13:22,579
What do you say?
224
00:13:26,199 --> 00:13:30,289
I am gonna scrub that smug
look right off your face.
225
00:13:34,999 --> 00:13:37,519
Oh, my back!
226
00:13:56,689 --> 00:13:59,049
where is he?
227
00:13:59,059 --> 00:14:01,229
I'm sorry. Have we met?
228
00:14:05,009 --> 00:14:06,849
wait...
229
00:14:06,879 --> 00:14:10,389
you're the girl who stuck
me here three years ago.
230
00:14:10,409 --> 00:14:13,439
You come by every christmas
and look at yo watch
231
00:14:13,459 --> 00:14:17,969
while I unwrap the socks you
bought me on the drive over.
232
00:14:18,009 --> 00:14:21,819
Do you know what's going on with
porter? The fire? The arrest?
233
00:14:22,069 --> 00:14:24,379
Yes. I read the newspapers.
234
00:14:24,389 --> 00:14:26,949
Everybody's ying for
that poor kid's blood.
235
00:14:26,969 --> 00:14:29,139
No, no. We have this great lawyer.
236
00:14:29,149 --> 00:14:31,029
He thinks he can get
the case thrown out.
237
00:14:31,059 --> 00:14:35,279
Oh, really? I didn't realize that.
238
00:14:35,289 --> 00:14:37,539
porter! Come out from under the bed!
239
00:14:37,549 --> 00:14:39,699
Mommy is here to take care of you!
240
00:14:39,719 --> 00:14:43,089
Just like she took care of me.
241
00:14:43,369 --> 00:14:45,309
Okay. I know you're mad.
242
00:14:45,319 --> 00:14:47,549
I know we have a lot
to hash out between us.
243
00:14:47,589 --> 00:14:50,989
But don't take your hate
for me out on your grandson.
244
00:14:51,009 --> 00:14:53,679
Now where is he?
245
00:14:53,689 --> 00:14:56,299
He's safe.
246
00:14:56,309 --> 00:15:00,509
I heard muriel fishman
rat me out to her brother,
247
00:15:00,539 --> 00:15:03,959
so I-I made sure that
porter cleared out.
248
00:15:03,969 --> 00:15:08,679
Mom... this is wrong. Please.
249
00:15:08,689 --> 00:15:12,689
Sucks to feel powerless,
doesn't it, lynette?
250
00:15:15,759 --> 00:15:18,969
Please, help!
251
00:15:20,889 --> 00:15:23,749
Please!
252
00:15:24,709 --> 00:15:29,489
I'm getng a really unpleasant picture
of what u're like in the ol' sackarooni.
253
00:15:30,319 --> 00:15:33,239
Face it, mer. We're stuck.
254
00:15:33,529 --> 00:15:35,109
Gotta get out.
255
00:15:35,129 --> 00:15:38,019
I'm supposed to be
meeting the moving company.
256
00:15:40,219 --> 00:15:42,279
what?
257
00:15:42,299 --> 00:15:46,069
Keep talking about how you're going
to move away and be with jackson.
258
00:15:46,099 --> 00:15:49,439
I ar stupidi makes time go faster.
259
00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:53,379
So now me wanting to be with
the man I love is stupid?
260
00:15:53,409 --> 00:15:57,719
And needy and pathetic
and... kinda hilarious.
261
00:15:57,729 --> 00:16:00,069
But there's one thing it's not, mayer.
262
00:16:00,099 --> 00:16:02,409
That's "unexpected."
263
00:16:02,419 --> 00:16:04,149
What are you getting at?
264
00:16:04,159 --> 00:16:07,379
Have you ever in your
life been without a man?
265
00:16:07,409 --> 00:16:10,139
- Of course I have.
- When?
266
00:16:10,149 --> 00:16:12,679
I don't know. I'm not sure.
267
00:16:16,809 --> 00:16:18,089
What are you doing?
268
00:16:18,119 --> 00:16:21,949
- making a calendar.
- Edie...
269
00:16:21,959 --> 00:16:26,919
oh, come on. We've got nothing but time,
and I assume you don't wanna make out, so...
270
00:16:26,929 --> 00:16:29,419
first boyfriend?
271
00:16:36,539 --> 00:16:39,319
Todd shaffer. I was 14.
272
00:16:41,239 --> 00:16:44,579
And why did you and hot toddy break up?
273
00:16:44,899 --> 00:16:47,339
He dumped me during math class.
274
00:16:47,359 --> 00:16:51,059
And how long did it take you
to start dating somebody else?
275
00:16:51,089 --> 00:16:53,229
This is a stupid
exercise.I refuse to--
276
00:16:53,239 --> 00:16:57,169
- when was it?
- Lunch. It was lunch.
277
00:17:02,909 --> 00:17:04,389
You know, I'm feeling
a bit randy tonight.
278
00:17:04,409 --> 00:17:06,599
What do you say we make a little love?
279
00:17:06,619 --> 00:17:10,439
Well, we've got 15 minutes
till the news is on. Why not?
280
00:17:14,379 --> 00:17:17,999
I still can't get over the
way alex behaved this morning.
281
00:17:18,369 --> 00:17:21,859
"Emasculating." I' never
heard such nonsense.
282
00:17:24,509 --> 00:17:25,859
Don't you think so?
283
00:17:25,879 --> 00:17:29,779
Well, I thought the matter in which
alex made his point was inappropriate.
284
00:17:29,789 --> 00:17:31,329
But?
285
00:17:31,349 --> 00:17:34,499
Well, I wouldn't say it was nonsense.
286
00:17:34,509 --> 00:17:36,959
You can be a little tough sometimes.
287
00:17:36,969 --> 00:17:41,639
"Tough"? That's not a word I
would use to describe myself.
288
00:17:41,649 --> 00:17:45,119
Nobody blames you, bree. You run a
business. You have to be formidable.
289
00:17:45,129 --> 00:17:48,469
Sometimes, if that frame of mind
carries over into your personal life,
290
00:17:48,499 --> 00:17:49,829
it's only to be expected.
291
00:17:49,849 --> 00:17:52,139
I don't think I do that.
292
00:17:52,169 --> 00:17:54,359
I know you don'T.
293
00:17:54,369 --> 00:17:56,719
It's not worth getting upset about.
294
00:17:56,749 --> 00:18:00,709
Andrew and I are used to it, and I'm sure
in time, alex will get used to it, too.
295
00:18:01,479 --> 00:18:04,509
Now... on to more pleasant things.
296
00:18:04,519 --> 00:18:08,769
Even though it's my turn, I
don't mind if you're on top.
297
00:18:16,469 --> 00:18:19,679
I think we forgot one.
298
00:18:20,309 --> 00:18:23,969
Didn't you date somebody after
you stole karl away from me?
299
00:18:23,979 --> 00:18:26,189
Ron. Dr. Ron.
300
00:18:26,739 --> 00:18:28,719
- Are we done?
- Yep.
301
00:18:28,729 --> 00:18:31,599
Here it is--the history
of your love life.
302
00:18:31,619 --> 00:18:33,289
Proof that you can't
be happy without a man.
303
00:18:33,299 --> 00:18:34,749
This is not proof of anything.
304
00:18:34,769 --> 00:18:39,359
Seven boyfriends through high
school and college-- only...
305
00:18:39,399 --> 00:18:42,269
41 days single.
306
00:18:42,289 --> 00:18:44,429
What does that tell you?
307
00:18:44,449 --> 00:18:45,849
My grades sucked?
308
00:18:45,869 --> 00:18:48,479
It's a cry for help, mayer.
309
00:18:48,489 --> 00:18:52,139
and it doesn't get much better into
the many decades of your adulthood.
310
00:18:53,979 --> 00:18:58,869
Hey, I was single for several
months after karl and after mike.
311
00:18:59,639 --> 00:19:03,219
But that wasn't of your
choosing. They dumped you.
312
00:19:05,839 --> 00:19:08,949
I know. It's hard to look in the mirror.
313
00:19:08,959 --> 00:19:11,369
Have you ever looked
in your mirror, edie?
314
00:19:11,399 --> 00:19:14,179
You're famous for the number
of men you've conquered.
315
00:19:14,189 --> 00:19:17,279
- Thank you.
- It's not a compliment, you tramp!
316
00:19:17,289 --> 00:19:22,649
Okay, i am not gonna take relationship
tips from a woman who has hooked up with...
317
00:19:22,669 --> 00:19:24,869
what is it? Over a thousand men?
318
00:19:24,879 --> 00:19:26,779
Okay, that's tE.I enjoyed the '80s
319
00:19:26,789 --> 00:19:30,749
but the difference is, I go
after men because I want them.
320
00:19:30,769 --> 00:19:33,029
You go after them because you need them.
321
00:19:33,059 --> 00:19:34,649
That is not much of a distinction.
322
00:19:34,679 --> 00:19:35,889
Yes, it is.
323
00:19:35,899 --> 00:19:40,649
You have holes in your heart that can
only be filled by a pair of trousers.
324
00:19:41,429 --> 00:19:44,829
Face it, mayer. You're weak.
325
00:19:51,479 --> 00:19:54,989
porter wasn't there, and she
won't tell me where he is.
326
00:19:55,789 --> 00:19:57,859
did you tell her that
he could end up in jail?
327
00:19:57,899 --> 00:19:59,059
Of course I did.
328
00:19:59,069 --> 00:20:02,599
Lynette, you're really upset.
Just hang up and come home.
329
00:20:02,609 --> 00:20:04,809
She's so angry at me.
330
00:20:04,839 --> 00:20:07,929
She's never gonna tell us where he is.
331
00:20:09,879 --> 00:20:13,629
lynette? Lynette?
332
00:20:18,243 --> 00:20:20,943
uh, we need to find lynette scavo.
333
00:20:20,963 --> 00:20:22,243
Let me check.
334
00:20:22,253 --> 00:20:23,543
This is all my fault.
335
00:20:23,563 --> 00:20:25,883
She was so worked up
when she left my room.
336
00:20:25,903 --> 00:20:28,763
I'm not finding a lynette scavo.
337
00:20:28,773 --> 00:20:30,253
Oh, my god. Does that mean she's dead?
338
00:20:30,263 --> 00:20:33,333
No. No.
339
00:20:33,343 --> 00:20:36,343
It means she outsmarted her mom.
340
00:20:36,973 --> 00:20:39,903
Oh, my god, porter,
we missed you so much.
341
00:20:41,353 --> 00:20:43,333
I-I don't understand. I
thought you were in an accident.
342
00:20:43,343 --> 00:20:46,733
No, sweetie. I was driving home last
night, talking with your dad on the phone,
343
00:20:46,743 --> 00:20:48,893
and two cars in front
of me had an accident.
344
00:20:48,923 --> 00:20:51,303
And I thought, damn, that could be me.
345
00:20:51,323 --> 00:20:55,373
And then I thought, that could be me.
346
00:20:55,973 --> 00:20:57,113
You scared the hell out of me.
347
00:20:57,153 --> 00:20:59,993
We are sorry, but we had to get you
back. You've gotta be in court by 5:00.
348
00:21:00,003 --> 00:21:01,463
I don't want to go to jail.
349
00:21:01,473 --> 00:21:03,713
Porter, listen to me.
Bob talked to the judge.
350
00:21:03,723 --> 00:21:06,853
He thinks he can get
them to drop the charges.
351
00:21:06,863 --> 00:21:09,093
I don't know if I should believe you.
352
00:21:09,103 --> 00:21:12,303
You're gonna have to.
353
00:21:17,293 --> 00:21:20,383
- Okay.
- great. Come on. Let's go.
354
00:21:21,473 --> 00:21:24,603
That was a rotten
thing you did, lynette.
355
00:21:27,643 --> 00:21:30,373
I thought you were dead.
356
00:21:30,383 --> 00:21:34,843
Yeah, well, what can I tell
ya? I learned from the best.
357
00:21:40,493 --> 00:21:42,723
celia! Juanita!
358
00:21:42,733 --> 00:21:45,743
I am not gonna ask you again
to pick up these clothes!
359
00:21:45,763 --> 00:21:47,883
You've got till the count of three!
360
00:21:47,913 --> 00:21:53,613
One... two... three!
361
00:21:55,413 --> 00:21:57,253
You can hear me, right?
362
00:21:57,263 --> 00:21:59,353
yeah!
363
00:21:59,363 --> 00:22:01,893
All right, that's it!
I'm calling your father!
364
00:22:02,763 --> 00:22:05,533
You are gonna get it now!
365
00:22:05,543 --> 00:22:09,563
He is gonna tear into you!
It is gonna be a bloodbath!
366
00:22:13,613 --> 00:22:14,663
hey, babe. What's up?
367
00:22:14,673 --> 00:22:17,933
- It's your children. They've run amok.
- What?
368
00:22:17,943 --> 00:22:20,433
Now that you've gone back to
work, they won't listen to me.
369
00:22:20,453 --> 00:22:23,603
They know you're not in the next room,
ready to drop the hammer. Help me!
370
00:22:23,613 --> 00:22:26,343
How? I'm in a meeting.
371
00:22:26,353 --> 00:22:29,823
O-okay. I'm gonna put you on speer,
and I want you to rip 'em a new one.
372
00:22:29,833 --> 00:22:32,253
I'm with clients. I
don't have time for this.
373
00:22:32,263 --> 00:22:34,453
- But-- -
I gotta go!
374
00:22:35,443 --> 00:22:38,153
Carlos? Carlos!
375
00:22:38,163 --> 00:22:42,353
I think he hung up, mommy.
Can you bring us a lemonade?
376
00:22:46,033 --> 00:22:47,113
hi, mike.
377
00:22:47,123 --> 00:22:49,203
- Hey, sorry I'm late.
- Where's katherine?
378
00:22:49,213 --> 00:22:51,613
Ah, headache. She ses her regrets.
379
00:22:52,903 --> 00:22:54,283
you mind if I grab a beer?
380
00:22:54,293 --> 00:22:55,933
Uh, yeah. In the test kitchen.
381
00:22:55,943 --> 00:22:59,923
Uh, beer sounds good. I think
I'll grab one, too. Excuse me.
382
00:23:04,373 --> 00:23:07,063
So... katherine not feeling well, huh?
383
00:23:07,073 --> 00:23:12,223
Yeah. Yeah, I think she also
might be a little miffed with me.
384
00:23:13,713 --> 00:23:16,313
this about baltimore?
385
00:23:17,043 --> 00:23:20,653
it's not that I want her
to go, 'cause I don'T.
386
00:23:21,833 --> 00:23:24,193
They why don't you tell her?
387
00:23:24,203 --> 00:23:28,693
I don't wanna be the guy that comes between her
and her daughter, not to mention a grandchild.
388
00:23:31,993 --> 00:23:35,593
I thought this was
because... I don't know.
389
00:23:35,603 --> 00:23:38,693
Maybe you're still
hung up on your ex-wife.
390
00:23:39,053 --> 00:23:43,293
Susan? No. No, that's over.
391
00:23:43,903 --> 00:23:46,433
You sure?
392
00:23:48,003 --> 00:23:52,233
And most guys I talk to, they say
they only really fall in love once.
393
00:23:52,263 --> 00:23:57,803
And even if it doesn't work, they spend the rest of
their lives thinking about the one that they lost.
394
00:23:58,993 --> 00:24:01,713
I always wondered if that's
how you felt about susan.
395
00:24:01,723 --> 00:24:03,683
Why would you wonder
about something like that?
396
00:24:03,693 --> 00:24:08,963
Oh, I don't know. You're
my friend. I care about you.
397
00:24:09,893 --> 00:24:11,993
well, no.
398
00:24:12,003 --> 00:24:16,223
In fact, dave, I think I might
be falling in love with katherine.
399
00:24:18,673 --> 00:24:21,823
Did you just use the "l" word?
400
00:24:23,003 --> 00:24:25,833
See, I-I didn't realize
it was that serious.
401
00:24:25,853 --> 00:24:31,193
Ll, to be honest, it didn't really
hit me until she said she might leave.
402
00:24:39,843 --> 00:24:43,283
Where are our guests?
The food's gonna get cold.
403
00:24:44,023 --> 00:24:45,373
Oh, I'll go find them.
404
00:24:45,383 --> 00:24:47,013
And bring some steak sauce.
405
00:24:47,043 --> 00:24:49,873
Oh, you're not gonna need
any sauce with these babies.
406
00:24:49,903 --> 00:24:52,143
They are seasoned to perfection.
407
00:24:52,163 --> 00:24:54,143
bring it.
408
00:24:54,153 --> 00:24:57,073
Well, there's no sense
in waiting. Dig in.
409
00:25:01,603 --> 00:25:04,593
Oh, dear. Are they overcooked?
410
00:25:04,603 --> 00:25:07,833
No, they're well-done.
That's the way I like them.
411
00:25:07,843 --> 00:25:09,733
Bree, what do you think?
412
00:25:09,773 --> 00:25:11,853
Oh, I really couldn't say.
413
00:25:11,863 --> 00:25:14,223
You couldn't say if
your meat is overcooked?
414
00:25:14,253 --> 00:25:17,903
No. I wouldn't want to upset anyone.
415
00:25:19,833 --> 00:25:22,273
Well, don't rrY. You won't upset me.
416
00:25:24,353 --> 00:25:27,783
I don't think she was referring to you.
417
00:25:29,583 --> 00:25:32,613
Well, it's just that grilling
is suca manly pastime.
418
00:25:32,633 --> 00:25:36,103
If I suggested that orson somehow
failed to produce the perfect steak,
419
00:25:36,133 --> 00:25:38,943
you might see it as another
example emasculation.
420
00:25:38,963 --> 00:25:41,463
I see. You're not gonna
let that go, are you?
421
00:25:41,473 --> 00:25:46,343
Well, for all I know, telling orson his steak
tastes like charcoal might be deballing him.
422
00:25:47,243 --> 00:25:50,703
You know, bree, you can make
your point and still be nice.
423
00:25:50,713 --> 00:25:53,003
You know what else would be nice, alex?
424
00:25:53,043 --> 00:25:56,413
Showing gratitude when people
have been generous with you.
425
00:25:56,423 --> 00:25:58,963
Don't listen to her,
alex. She's not mad at you.
426
00:25:58,973 --> 00:26:02,603
She's mad at me... and the meat.
427
00:26:03,773 --> 00:26:06,193
Gratitude? What do you mean by that?
428
00:26:06,203 --> 00:26:07,803
I mean I bought you a house.
429
00:26:07,823 --> 00:26:10,153
You'd think you'd show
me a little respect.
430
00:26:10,163 --> 00:26:12,043
seriously? You're bringing up the house?
431
00:26:12,053 --> 00:26:15,343
Well, why not? It was a fairly
grand gesture on my part.
432
00:26:15,353 --> 00:26:18,383
Yes, and one that apparently
comes with strings.
433
00:26:18,423 --> 00:26:23,563
If by "strings," you mean I won't let you
be rude to me in my own house, then yes.
434
00:26:24,383 --> 00:26:29,573
You know wha I think I'm going to
have to decline your grand gesture.
435
00:26:29,583 --> 00:26:32,293
Keep the hse.
436
00:26:37,403 --> 00:26:40,263
What's wrong?
437
00:26:40,803 --> 00:26:44,173
Orson burnt the steaks.
438
00:26:49,924 --> 00:26:53,634
Susan, how can you tell
if pickles have botulism?
439
00:26:53,644 --> 00:26:57,104
Ah, what the hell? I shoot
this stuff into my forehead.
440
00:26:59,074 --> 00:27:02,854
Forget it. I'd rather
starv for a day or two.
441
00:27:02,864 --> 00:27:07,454
By then, you'll be dead, and I can use
your remains as a source of protein.
442
00:27:09,354 --> 00:27:12,224
Oh, come on. That was funny.
443
00:27:13,704 --> 00:27:18,634
You know... maybe i do feel
incomplete without a man.
444
00:27:18,644 --> 00:27:23,984
But I... wouldn't trade places with
you for anything. You wanna know why?
445
00:27:23,994 --> 00:27:27,194
No, but I'm trapped,
so knock yourself out.
446
00:27:27,214 --> 00:27:31,244
It's the way you are with
men-- they're like tissues.
447
00:27:31,274 --> 00:27:35,024
You use one and then toss it awa
and then you're on to the next one.
448
00:27:35,034 --> 00:27:38,904
At least I'm looking for something al.
449
00:27:39,204 --> 00:27:43,734
so you think this happy ending
crap that you believe in is real?
450
00:27:44,234 --> 00:27:47,914
Please. I know what men are really like.
451
00:27:48,564 --> 00:27:50,224
Really?
452
00:27:50,254 --> 00:27:55,314
Well, when I was 16, my dad had an affair
with this woman who had a 10-year-old daughter.
453
00:27:55,344 --> 00:28:00,374
And one day, he told my mom and
me that he was leaving us for them.
454
00:28:00,394 --> 00:28:02,524
Oh, my god.
455
00:28:02,534 --> 00:28:04,614
No talking.
456
00:28:04,624 --> 00:28:08,144
A week later, he comes to
the house to get his stuff,
457
00:28:08,154 --> 00:28:12,144
and my mom didn't want to see
him, so we went to the movies.
458
00:28:12,154 --> 00:28:16,654
Now I had this, uh,
horse figurine collection.
459
00:28:16,664 --> 00:28:20,644
Plastic, glass, ceramic--
hundreds of them.
460
00:28:20,674 --> 00:28:25,914
Anyway, we come back from the movies,
and my dad had taken all his stuff.
461
00:28:25,924 --> 00:28:31,614
So... I go into my bedroom,
and something seems different.
462
00:28:31,624 --> 00:28:36,604
And then I realize all
of mhorses were gone.
463
00:28:39,514 --> 00:28:43,444
My mom called my dad and
screamed and all he said was,
464
00:28:43,454 --> 00:28:50,034
I was too old for th and that his girlfriend's
daughter would appreciate them more.
465
00:28:56,574 --> 00:29:00,314
can you believe that? What a fungus.
466
00:29:01,924 --> 00:29:04,794
oh, god. Are you crying?
467
00:29:05,134 --> 00:29:09,084
it's just... now I get it.
468
00:29:09,794 --> 00:29:11,114
Get what?
469
00:29:11,124 --> 00:29:15,214
All these years, I
have judged you, and...
470
00:29:15,234 --> 00:29:18,794
it is not your fault. Oh, come here.
471
00:29:19,474 --> 00:29:23,234
you are the way you are
because of your father.
472
00:29:26,094 --> 00:29:28,264
Edie, what the hell?
473
00:29:28,294 --> 00:29:30,544
Don't psychoanalyze me, you simp!
474
00:29:30,564 --> 00:29:33,334
I was just trying to tell
you how selfish men are.
475
00:29:33,374 --> 00:29:39,654
And I was just trying to be nice and give
you a free pass for being such a big slut!
476
00:29:43,914 --> 00:29:46,194
Edie!
477
00:29:46,574 --> 00:29:50,304
Okay, girls. Pick up your toys and
put 'em in the basket before dinner.
478
00:29:50,314 --> 00:29:53,964
Dinner's not for two hours.
479
00:29:57,874 --> 00:30:00,664
I've had enough of your
crap. Now pick up these toys!
480
00:30:00,674 --> 00:30:02,204
No!
481
00:30:02,224 --> 00:30:05,534
Okay, juanita. What is going on
here? Why are you being so difficult?
482
00:30:05,544 --> 00:30:08,274
When daddy asks you to do
something, you just do it.
483
00:30:08,284 --> 00:30:11,304
That's because I love daddy mo.
484
00:30:17,004 --> 00:30:19,194
Fine.
485
00:30:35,194 --> 00:30:37,024
everything okay, mrs. Solis?
486
00:30:37,044 --> 00:30:39,794
Yeah. just my kids.
487
00:30:39,804 --> 00:30:42,674
They really know how push my buttons.
488
00:30:42,684 --> 00:30:46,324
Oh, yeah. I got a couple
monsters at home, too.
489
00:30:46,334 --> 00:30:49,414
The key is, you gotta
be the bigger monster.
490
00:30:49,434 --> 00:30:53,184
Well, unfortunately,
they're not afraid of me.
491
00:30:53,204 --> 00:30:57,904
Ooh, that's bad. Fear is the
foundation of all good parenting.
492
00:30:57,914 --> 00:30:59,974
You gotta practice your big voice.
493
00:30:59,994 --> 00:31:02,234
finish that broccoli now!
494
00:31:02,244 --> 00:31:03,884
you see how that works?
495
00:31:03,914 --> 00:31:06,314
Yeah. It's very effective.
496
00:31:06,324 --> 00:31:08,424
well...
497
00:31:09,074 --> 00:31:12,394
hey, you got an extra 15 minutes?
498
00:31:12,404 --> 00:31:16,084
do it! Faster! Faster! Faster!
499
00:31:16,094 --> 00:31:19,134
I wanna see this place sparkle!
500
00:31:19,144 --> 00:31:20,994
Mommy...
501
00:31:21,004 --> 00:31:22,194
it's out of my hands, girls.
502
00:31:22,214 --> 00:31:25,444
Word got out that you were
disobeying, and they sent reggie over.
503
00:31:25,454 --> 00:31:27,534
Who sent reggie over?
504
00:31:27,564 --> 00:31:30,964
Well, I know how much
you love him, but...
505
00:31:30,974 --> 00:31:33,574
it was your daddy.
506
00:31:33,904 --> 00:31:36,734
Enough chatter. Ke moving!
507
00:31:41,384 --> 00:31:42,944
when they're done, you
want me to make them vacuum?
508
00:31:42,964 --> 00:31:45,494
- If you wouldn't mind.
- Nah.
509
00:31:48,174 --> 00:31:49,224
Gues
510
00:31:49,254 --> 00:31:53,754
- aw, come on, edie. I said I was sorry.
- Guess
511
00:31:53,764 --> 00:31:55,824
July?
512
00:31:55,854 --> 00:31:58,304
Wrong. March!
513
00:31:58,314 --> 00:32:01,074
Man, you're bad at this.
514
00:32:01,614 --> 00:32:04,244
Guess.
515
00:32:04,704 --> 00:32:06,344
oh, hey, mrs. Williams. I
didn't know you were down here.
516
00:32:06,354 --> 00:32:10,154
Oh, thank god! We've been
locked in here all night.
517
00:32:10,164 --> 00:32:13,724
Really? Good thing I came by
to check the rat traps then.
518
00:32:13,734 --> 00:32:17,094
I'm glad I forgot about those until now.
519
00:32:17,104 --> 00:32:18,954
uh, mayer?
520
00:32:18,984 --> 00:32:25,004
I, uh, would appreciate it if you
wouldn't talk about what we talked about.
521
00:32:26,204 --> 00:32:28,024
I wasn't planning to.
522
00:32:28,044 --> 00:32:30,794
Good, because I'll deny it if you do.
523
00:32:31,324 --> 00:32:32,514
I won'T.
524
00:32:32,534 --> 00:32:35,014
And... I'll kill you.
525
00:32:35,024 --> 00:32:37,544
Good-bye, edie.
526
00:32:37,934 --> 00:32:40,944
oh, I'll bring your mail
over when I get home.
527
00:32:41,284 --> 00:32:44,164
Thks.
528
00:32:47,039 --> 00:32:48,879
Hey, mom.
529
00:32:50,369 --> 00:32:54,019
I just came by to tell you that the judge
threw out porter's case for lack of evidence.
530
00:32:54,029 --> 00:32:56,489
Isn't that great?
531
00:32:58,359 --> 00:33:00,419
Mom...
532
00:33:00,439 --> 00:33:03,659
I did not put you in here to punish you.
533
00:33:03,679 --> 00:33:07,109
I didn't have a choice.
534
00:33:07,119 --> 00:33:09,529
- You had a choice.
- No, I didn'T.
535
00:33:09,539 --> 00:33:13,309
From the moment glen died,
u were out of control.
536
00:33:13,319 --> 00:33:16,189
It's true you lost all
that money in vegas.
537
00:33:16,209 --> 00:33:17,749
You started drinking again.
538
00:33:17,779 --> 00:33:19,679
D how many times did I go to your condo,
539
00:33:19,699 --> 00:33:23,849
only to finyou asleep on the sofa
with a cigarette in your mouth?
540
00:33:23,869 --> 00:33:26,729
No, I won't apologize
for bringing you here.
541
00:33:26,739 --> 00:33:29,149
I did it because I love you.
542
00:33:29,159 --> 00:33:31,659
Then why don't you come visit me?
543
00:33:31,679 --> 00:33:34,349
It's not a very pleasant experience.
544
00:33:34,369 --> 00:33:36,039
So I yell a little.
545
00:33:36,059 --> 00:33:40,059
So I toss a few curse
words your way. Big deal!
546
00:33:40,069 --> 00:33:42,379
Last time I came, you
threw pudding at me.
547
00:33:42,399 --> 00:33:45,509
I'm an angry old woman,
lynette! What do you expect?
548
00:33:45,519 --> 00:33:47,779
Here's a thought--
stop being angry.
549
00:33:47,789 --> 00:33:49,319
How?
550
00:33:49,329 --> 00:33:54,529
I can't make a friend in this place without having
them drop dead of a stroke five minutes later.
551
00:33:54,559 --> 00:33:59,079
I-I feel like hell. Every time I
look in the mirror, I wanna scream.
552
00:33:59,449 --> 00:34:03,119
My anger is all I've got left, baby.
553
00:34:04,729 --> 00:34:08,159
If I let go of that,
it's over. I know it.
554
00:34:08,169 --> 00:34:10,739
The ball game will be over.
555
00:34:11,499 --> 00:34:16,719
The ball game is going to end
whether you like it or not.
556
00:34:18,209 --> 00:34:22,659
I would like to be here with you
for whatever time you have left.
557
00:34:24,129 --> 00:34:28,169
But for that to happen,
things have to change.
558
00:34:34,179 --> 00:34:36,959
Would you come visit me more often?
559
00:34:36,969 --> 00:34:41,219
At least twice a week, and
sometimes I'd bring the kids.
560
00:34:46,519 --> 00:34:52,479
I'd like that. You know,
they turned out really good.
561
00:34:54,909 --> 00:34:58,059
How'd you learn how
to be such a good mom?
562
00:34:59,939 --> 00:35:02,629
I have no idea.
563
00:35:06,599 --> 00:35:10,419
Well, now that you're here, why don't
you stay, and we can talk a while?
564
00:35:10,429 --> 00:35:13,729
I--and get my flask
out of the drawer.
565
00:35:14,529 --> 00:35:18,979
Hey, I can't be nice, forgiving
and sober all at the same time.
566
00:35:26,399 --> 00:35:28,819
- Daddy!
- daddy!
567
00:35:30,079 --> 00:35:31,829
Missed you guys.
568
00:35:31,849 --> 00:35:34,999
You're really helping
mommy, huh? That's great.
569
00:35:35,009 --> 00:35:38,439
The scary man told us we had to.
570
00:35:41,559 --> 00:35:44,279
We don't even know the guy.
He left a flier in our mailbox.
571
00:35:44,289 --> 00:35:45,699
You left him do your parenting?
572
00:35:45,709 --> 00:35:47,989
Hey, you're the one who
told me to get creative.
573
00:35:47,999 --> 00:35:49,929
This wasn't what I meant!
574
00:35:49,949 --> 00:35:51,889
Easy for you to say.
575
00:35:51,919 --> 00:35:54,499
They told me they love you more than me.
576
00:35:55,759 --> 00:35:58,879
And when I was running things,
they said they loved you more.
577
00:36:00,309 --> 00:36:02,609
Really?
578
00:36:03,549 --> 00:36:07,709
So don't get your feelings hurt, and stop
asking strangers to discipline our kids.
579
00:36:07,729 --> 00:36:10,599
Well, I wouldn't have
to if you would do it.
580
00:36:13,119 --> 00:36:16,939
so you want me to go twork all
day, go out on business trips,
581
00:36:16,959 --> 00:36:20,809
and what little time I have here with the
girls, you want me to spend screaming at them?
582
00:36:20,839 --> 00:36:23,439
Just for the first 15 minutes
after you walk in the door.
583
00:36:23,449 --> 00:36:24,909
Then it's carlos time.
584
00:36:24,939 --> 00:36:28,739
Forget it! This was the arrangement
you wanted. You made me take this job.
585
00:36:28,749 --> 00:36:31,719
I just wanted us to have a normal life.
586
00:36:31,729 --> 00:36:34,599
Well, guess what, sweetie?
Dad's unhappy at work.
587
00:36:34,609 --> 00:36:38,449
Mom's home with the
screaming kids. You got one.
588
00:36:44,969 --> 00:36:47,869
Oh, good. You're back.
589
00:36:48,729 --> 00:36:50,869
Can we talk?
590
00:36:50,889 --> 00:36:52,739
If it's about work, yes.
591
00:36:52,769 --> 00:36:56,279
If it's about what happened
at the barbecue, no.
592
00:36:56,289 --> 00:36:57,839
Fine.Then as my employee,
593
00:36:57,849 --> 00:37:01,359
I authorize a 5-minute break so we
can talk about my son's boyfriend
594
00:37:01,379 --> 00:37:04,509
and his absurd
overreaction this afternoon.
595
00:37:04,519 --> 00:37:05,829
Th's it. I'm out of here.
596
00:37:05,839 --> 00:37:08,679
Andrew, please. You were there.
Alex started the whole thing.
597
00:37:08,689 --> 00:37:11,789
You need to tell him
to stop criticizing me.
598
00:37:11,809 --> 00:37:13,759
I'm--I'm not getting
in the middle of this.
599
00:37:13,789 --> 00:37:16,179
If you have a problem
with alex, you tell him.
600
00:37:16,199 --> 00:37:18,569
I tried. He won't listen to me.
601
00:37:18,579 --> 00:37:21,209
Don't you mean obey?
602
00:37:21,489 --> 00:37:25,849
He's not your son. He's not your
husband. He's not your employee.
603
00:37:26,179 --> 00:37:29,029
Not everyone has to listen to you.
604
00:37:30,899 --> 00:37:33,929
I'll--I'll do
this tomorrow.
605
00:37:54,389 --> 00:37:57,169
I got the flowers.
606
00:38:02,919 --> 00:38:05,139
They were from you, right?
607
00:38:05,149 --> 00:38:07,419
Oh, yeah.
608
00:38:24,328 --> 00:38:27,428
I just have a minute, and I don't want
to get into a whole thing with you.
609
00:38:27,448 --> 00:38:29,508
This won't take long.
610
00:38:29,538 --> 00:38:33,328
I don't want to fight anymore.
Please, just take the house.
611
00:38:37,118 --> 00:38:40,058
I don't know how else to say this.
612
00:38:40,068 --> 00:38:43,008
What happened yesterday
is gonna happen again.
613
00:38:43,038 --> 00:38:46,768
It's not gonna be the last time
we fight, 'cause that's who we are.
614
00:38:48,888 --> 00:38:52,298
Let's not make it worse by
living on top of each other.
615
00:38:54,288 --> 00:38:57,348
Alex...
616
00:38:57,908 --> 00:39:03,918
I'm gonna tell you something I haven't told
anybody-- not orson, not andrew, just you.
617
00:39:10,418 --> 00:39:16,468
I know that I've changed since my business
took off, but I didn't want to admit it.
618
00:39:17,008 --> 00:39:22,188
I've watched myself become
selfish, impatient, rude.
619
00:39:23,008 --> 00:39:28,608
I was never thtype to suffer fools gladly,
but now I seem to find fools everywhere.
620
00:39:28,978 --> 00:39:32,258
And I don't want to be that way.
621
00:39:33,158 --> 00:39:36,778
I need someone who isn't
afraid to speak out,
622
00:39:36,788 --> 00:39:40,498
to call me out when I cross those lines,
623
00:39:40,508 --> 00:39:44,188
and I would love it if
you would be that person.
624
00:39:47,368 --> 00:39:51,298
Did my mother-in-law just give
me permission to criticize her?
625
00:39:51,308 --> 00:39:53,738
Yes, I did.
626
00:39:57,218 --> 00:40:00,558
I'm a lucky guy.
627
00:40:06,808 --> 00:40:09,078
Edie.
628
00:40:09,658 --> 00:40:11,878
Listen, um...
629
00:40:11,888 --> 00:40:17,758
I'm not happy about you lying to me,
but I think what we have is real, A...
630
00:40:18,658 --> 00:40:22,258
I'm not ready to throw it away.
631
00:40:22,948 --> 00:40:25,548
Really?
632
00:40:26,218 --> 00:40:30,248
And don't tell anyone, but
I'm at the point in my life
633
00:40:30,288 --> 00:40:34,128
where I could use a happy ending.
634
00:40:35,728 --> 00:40:38,298
I'll get my stuff.
635
00:40:52,068 --> 00:40:53,288
hello?
636
00:40:53,308 --> 00:40:55,408
Jackson, hi. Do you have a sec?
637
00:40:55,418 --> 00:40:56,998
Sure. Is something wrong?
638
00:40:57,008 --> 00:40:59,838
Uh, no, nothing's wrong. Just...
639
00:41:00,958 --> 00:41:04,228
we need to talk about this move.
640
00:41:06,408 --> 00:41:09,188
At 5:15 that afternoon,
641
00:41:09,198 --> 00:41:13,048
edie williams began calling
her friends to inform them
642
00:41:13,058 --> 00:41:16,228
that her husband had come home.
643
00:41:16,238 --> 00:41:20,908
Sadly, she never got
through to any of them.
644
00:41:21,338 --> 00:41:23,508
gabrielle never picked up.
645
00:41:23,538 --> 00:41:28,988
She was too busy watching her children
being told they had to obey their mother...
646
00:41:29,398 --> 00:41:32,238
and trying not to smile.
647
00:41:33,658 --> 00:41:37,028
Lynette wasn't home when edie called.
648
00:41:37,338 --> 00:41:43,228
she was with her mother, laughing and
sharing stories about the old days...
649
00:41:43,738 --> 00:41:46,878
and enjoying every minute of it.
650
00:41:47,918 --> 00:41:52,828
Bree was outside showing her
future son-in-law color samples
651
00:41:52,838 --> 00:41:55,648
for the home she had bought him...
652
00:41:55,658 --> 00:41:59,568
and smiling politely
when they disagreed.
653
00:42:00,608 --> 00:42:04,198
And susan-- well,
she didn't answer
654
00:42:04,208 --> 00:42:08,598
because she was sittinin her
favorite chair with a cup of tea...
655
00:42:08,608 --> 00:42:13,208
learning to enjoy, for
the first time in her life,
656
00:42:13,218 --> 00:42:17,338
what it was like to be alone.
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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