1 00:00:00,958 --> 00:00:04,613 My name is B. J. Novak. I wanna tell you about this show I made. 2 00:00:04,656 --> 00:00:07,050 It's a completely different episode every time. 3 00:00:07,094 --> 00:00:08,138 - Pop culture. - Sex. 4 00:00:08,182 --> 00:00:09,226 Revenge. 5 00:00:09,270 --> 00:00:10,271 Here it is. Is that it? 6 00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:12,012 That's it. 7 00:00:22,457 --> 00:00:25,329 - Attention! - The party bus will be leaving 8 00:00:25,373 --> 00:00:26,852 - in a moment! - We have 9 00:00:26,896 --> 00:00:29,594 a massive backlog of Vampiric Council business, 10 00:00:29,638 --> 00:00:31,944 and you all pick now to go on a trip? 11 00:00:31,988 --> 00:00:35,339 All work, no play makes Colin Robinson a dull guy. 12 00:00:35,383 --> 00:00:36,906 Guillermo, there are two missing. 13 00:00:39,256 --> 00:00:40,214 Great. 14 00:00:40,257 --> 00:00:41,867 Holiday time! 15 00:00:41,911 --> 00:00:43,608 It has been several decades since we have taken 16 00:00:43,652 --> 00:00:45,306 an excursion away from our home. 17 00:00:45,349 --> 00:00:46,611 But Sean and Charmaine... 18 00:00:46,655 --> 00:00:48,396 Seanie! 19 00:00:48,439 --> 00:00:50,789 Yes, exactly. Sean and Charmaine from next door 20 00:00:50,833 --> 00:00:52,530 have organized a group getaway 21 00:00:52,574 --> 00:00:53,836 to celebrate their anniversary. 22 00:00:53,879 --> 00:00:55,098 - Yeah. - And... 23 00:00:55,142 --> 00:00:56,969 - they've invited us! 24 00:00:57,013 --> 00:00:58,841 For vampires, traveling away 25 00:00:58,884 --> 00:01:00,582 from home can be very difficult. 26 00:01:00,625 --> 00:01:02,453 It's not the same as just flashing 27 00:01:02,497 --> 00:01:05,630 a few papers or wanking off Morris from steerage. 28 00:01:05,674 --> 00:01:07,154 There's a lot more to it. 29 00:01:07,197 --> 00:01:09,286 Most important rule-- you must 30 00:01:09,330 --> 00:01:12,115 take with you the homeland soil of your coffin. 31 00:01:12,159 --> 00:01:14,465 -Without this ancestral earth... - Thank you. 32 00:01:14,509 --> 00:01:15,858 ...you cannot sleep, you cannot leave, 33 00:01:15,901 --> 00:01:16,902 - Come. -...you cannot hypnotize, 34 00:01:16,946 --> 00:01:18,643 and your powers go 35 00:01:18,687 --> 00:01:20,297 to absolute liquid shit. 36 00:01:20,341 --> 00:01:23,039 Take the soil with me. All of it. 37 00:01:23,083 --> 00:01:25,302 - Tie a knot. Very safe. - There we are. 38 00:01:25,346 --> 00:01:26,782 Ready to travel! 39 00:01:27,913 --> 00:01:29,350 Some call our destination 40 00:01:29,393 --> 00:01:31,308 a mecca of the depraved. 41 00:01:31,352 --> 00:01:34,181 America's premier nocturnal playground 42 00:01:34,224 --> 00:01:36,139 of hedonistic debauchery. 43 00:01:36,183 --> 00:01:38,968 Sin City, U.S. of A., baby! 44 00:01:39,011 --> 00:01:42,537 ♪ Viva Atlantic City♪ 45 00:01:42,580 --> 00:01:45,931 -♪ Viva Atlantic City♪ - Atlantic City, baby! 46 00:01:45,975 --> 00:01:47,237 - Atlantic City, baby. -♪ Viva...♪ 47 00:01:47,281 --> 00:01:48,804 Not you, Guillermo. 48 00:01:48,847 --> 00:01:49,892 -♪ Viva♪ -♪ Atlantic♪ 49 00:01:49,935 --> 00:01:51,633 ♪ City!♪ 50 00:01:56,594 --> 00:01:59,380 ♪ Don't sing if you want to live long♪ 51 00:01:59,423 --> 00:02:01,382 ♪ They have no use for your song♪ 52 00:02:01,425 --> 00:02:03,775 -- Atlantic City, baby! 53 00:02:03,819 --> 00:02:06,082 - ♪ You're dead, you're dead, you're dead♪ 54 00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:08,215 ♪ You're dead and out of this world♪ 55 00:02:10,086 --> 00:02:12,088 ♪ Now your hope and compassion is gone♪ 56 00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:14,264 ♪ You sold out your dream to the world♪ 57 00:02:14,308 --> 00:02:18,268 ♪ Stay dead, stay dead, stay dead, you're dead♪ 58 00:02:18,312 --> 00:02:20,531 -♪ And out of this world.♪ - Come on, guys, get off the bus! 59 00:02:20,575 --> 00:02:21,489 Yeah! 60 00:02:30,237 --> 00:02:32,021 Here you go, my darling. 61 00:02:32,064 --> 00:02:34,937 Your home away from home. 62 00:02:38,288 --> 00:02:40,029 I'll be honest-- I'm jealous. 63 00:02:40,072 --> 00:02:41,944 That cot looks pretty sweet. 64 00:02:41,987 --> 00:02:43,728 Really? Do you want to trade? 65 00:02:43,772 --> 00:02:46,122 No, I was just being polite. It's obviously very shitty. 66 00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:47,776 Thank you for the tiny bed. 67 00:02:47,819 --> 00:02:50,039 I hereby present you, the innkeeper, 68 00:02:50,082 --> 00:02:52,346 with a feather from a female crow, 69 00:02:52,389 --> 00:02:54,043 as is customary amongst travelers. 70 00:02:54,086 --> 00:02:56,219 Uh, sir, sorry, no, this is for you. 71 00:02:56,263 --> 00:02:58,961 - I'll take that, thank you. - I'm going to spread my soil. 72 00:02:59,004 --> 00:03:01,964 Hey, Nadja, Laszlo, you guys hitting the skins in there? 73 00:03:02,007 --> 00:03:03,748 Yes, Colin Robinson, we are! 74 00:03:03,792 --> 00:03:05,315 Oh. 75 00:03:05,359 --> 00:03:07,665 - ♪ Al Qolnidar.♪ 76 00:03:07,709 --> 00:03:10,015 It smells like shit. Okay, so 65% off, Nordstrom Rack. 77 00:03:10,059 --> 00:03:11,843 - No! - Yes. 78 00:03:11,887 --> 00:03:13,932 - What are you doing? - Stop. - On my mother. 79 00:03:13,976 --> 00:03:16,500 - Norway? Wow. - No, well, Nordstrom Rack, yeah. 80 00:03:16,544 --> 00:03:17,849 Ding, ding, ding. Ding, ding, ding. 81 00:03:17,893 --> 00:03:19,242 Ding, ding, ding! 82 00:03:19,286 --> 00:03:21,244 Now, anyone who knows me 83 00:03:21,288 --> 00:03:23,464 knows that I am not much for speeches. 84 00:03:23,507 --> 00:03:26,249 - Seanie! - Hey! There he is! 85 00:03:26,293 --> 00:03:28,251 But, uh, I just want to say to my wife... 86 00:03:28,295 --> 00:03:29,252 That's me. 87 00:03:29,296 --> 00:03:31,254 ...that I adore you. 88 00:03:31,298 --> 00:03:32,951 -- Yeah. - I mean, look at us. 89 00:03:32,995 --> 00:03:34,953 You know? It's 11 friends, 90 00:03:34,997 --> 00:03:36,346 all together. 91 00:03:36,390 --> 00:03:38,348 - It's pretty amazing, you know? - Yeah. 92 00:03:38,392 --> 00:03:41,264 Holy shit. It's just like Ocean's Eleven! 93 00:03:41,308 --> 00:03:42,918 --"What, did you guys get a group rate 94 00:03:42,961 --> 00:03:44,833 - or something?" - Yes! 95 00:03:46,051 --> 00:03:47,314 I love this woman! 96 00:03:47,357 --> 00:03:48,837 Okay, okay. 97 00:03:48,880 --> 00:03:50,447 I've always been a Twelve man at heart. 98 00:03:50,491 --> 00:03:52,754 But, recently, we rewatched Eleven, 99 00:03:52,797 --> 00:03:55,496 and I have to say that it's, uh, not just a prequel. 100 00:03:55,539 --> 00:03:58,150 It's, uh... it's got a lot of world-building, too. 101 00:03:58,194 --> 00:04:00,240 All right, let's bring it up a little bit. 102 00:04:00,283 --> 00:04:02,111 Let's give a shout-out to my best buds. 103 00:04:02,154 --> 00:04:04,113 - My main man Laz. - Seanie! 104 00:04:04,156 --> 00:04:07,072 To my guy. Frankie, we played peewee together. 105 00:04:07,116 --> 00:04:09,074 - Frankie! - Yeah, you remember that? 106 00:04:09,118 --> 00:04:12,295 Hey, Mikey! Wake up! We played peewee together, too, right? 107 00:04:12,339 --> 00:04:14,123 - Oh! Holy shit! - Mikey! 108 00:04:14,166 --> 00:04:15,690 - What, are you drunk already?! - Oh, no. 109 00:04:15,733 --> 00:04:17,431 - There's glass in all our food. 110 00:04:17,474 --> 00:04:18,910 - We can't eat it. - Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up. 111 00:04:18,954 --> 00:04:21,435 Gizmo, be a good familiar and fetch a broom. 112 00:04:21,478 --> 00:04:23,175 Well, I'm not a familiar anymore, so... 113 00:04:23,219 --> 00:04:24,655 Fetch a broom from the hostess now, Guillermo. 114 00:04:26,962 --> 00:04:28,616 Ooh, ah. 115 00:04:28,659 --> 00:04:30,357 Cheeky prick. 116 00:04:30,400 --> 00:04:32,315 Yeah, the transition 117 00:04:32,359 --> 00:04:35,927 from familiar to bodyguard has been, um... 118 00:04:37,712 --> 00:04:40,192 ...not much of a transition, I guess? 119 00:04:40,236 --> 00:04:42,238 Guillermo is no longer a familiar. 120 00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:45,197 So just make him feel like he's part of the team. 121 00:04:45,241 --> 00:04:49,027 No, no, Nandor is right. I mean, at every office I've worked at, 122 00:04:49,071 --> 00:04:52,030 they always say, "We're a big family here." 123 00:04:52,074 --> 00:04:53,902 And it does motivate people to work harder 124 00:04:53,945 --> 00:04:56,208 and neglect their actual families 125 00:04:56,252 --> 00:04:57,645 and put up with all sorts of degrading shit. 126 00:04:57,688 --> 00:04:59,168 Okay. 127 00:04:59,211 --> 00:05:01,170 They are going to bring a mop and a broom. 128 00:05:01,213 --> 00:05:02,519 Oh. 129 00:05:02,563 --> 00:05:04,173 - Hmm? 130 00:05:04,216 --> 00:05:05,305 Um... 131 00:05:05,348 --> 00:05:06,828 Hello, Guillermo. 132 00:05:06,871 --> 00:05:10,614 Um, do you have any, um... 133 00:05:10,658 --> 00:05:12,486 - interests? - That's a great question. 134 00:05:12,529 --> 00:05:14,139 I was wondering that, too. 135 00:05:14,183 --> 00:05:16,272 - Do I have any interests? - Hmm. 136 00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:18,100 - Yes, of course I... - Wow! Very cool. 137 00:05:18,143 --> 00:05:21,190 He's got interests and he knows what's... interesting. 138 00:05:21,233 --> 00:05:24,106 - Yeah. I've got interests, too. - Hmm. 139 00:05:24,149 --> 00:05:26,108 It's important. 140 00:05:26,151 --> 00:05:27,718 - Okay. - We are the same. 141 00:05:27,762 --> 00:05:29,024 - All with interests. - Mm. 142 00:05:29,067 --> 00:05:30,678 Uh, you've got interests, don't you, 143 00:05:30,721 --> 00:05:32,244 - Colin Robinson? - I like to walk around. 144 00:05:32,288 --> 00:05:34,421 - I like to stare. - Did I... 145 00:05:34,464 --> 00:05:35,465 did I miss something? 146 00:05:35,509 --> 00:05:36,945 We're all a big family here. 147 00:05:36,988 --> 00:05:38,381 Right. 148 00:05:38,425 --> 00:05:39,991 These interests that you have, 149 00:05:40,035 --> 00:05:41,384 - do they involve the fairer sex? 150 00:05:41,428 --> 00:05:43,038 I'm not gonna do that. 151 00:05:43,081 --> 00:05:44,431 - I'm not talking... - Guillermo, do you have yourself 152 00:05:44,474 --> 00:05:46,433 a little cutie, chubby little girlfriend? 153 00:05:46,476 --> 00:05:48,043 Why does she have to be chub-- You know what... 154 00:05:48,086 --> 00:05:50,393 - Maybe a boyfriend? - Yes. Have you got 155 00:05:50,437 --> 00:05:52,003 a little secret, you little sick fuck? 156 00:05:52,047 --> 00:05:54,615 Yeah, come on, you stinky bitch. The library is open. 157 00:05:54,658 --> 00:05:56,268 -- Definitely not gonna talk about... 158 00:05:56,312 --> 00:05:58,967 - Oh, one of each, you dirty dog. - Ooh, yes, he does. 159 00:05:59,010 --> 00:06:02,449 No, I... I just-- I guess I grew up in a family where, you know, 160 00:06:02,492 --> 00:06:04,146 talking about your private life 161 00:06:04,189 --> 00:06:05,582 is... that. 162 00:06:05,626 --> 00:06:07,845 - It's private. - Oh, please. 163 00:06:07,889 --> 00:06:10,282 Do you know what the most beautiful thing in the world is? 164 00:06:10,326 --> 00:06:11,327 What? 165 00:06:11,371 --> 00:06:12,459 Fucking. 166 00:06:12,502 --> 00:06:14,461 The kaleidoscopic entwining 167 00:06:14,504 --> 00:06:16,811 of limbs and genitalia. 168 00:06:16,854 --> 00:06:18,900 Men, women. Women, men. 169 00:06:18,943 --> 00:06:20,336 Women, women, women, 170 00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:22,730 women, men, men, men, men. 171 00:06:22,773 --> 00:06:23,774 Anything gets me hard. 172 00:06:23,818 --> 00:06:25,602 Sometimes it's a problem. 173 00:06:25,646 --> 00:06:27,125 Not to me. 174 00:06:27,169 --> 00:06:28,866 Everyone fucks and sucks, 175 00:06:28,910 --> 00:06:30,955 - thousands of chaps and chap-esses... - Mm. 176 00:06:30,999 --> 00:06:33,436 ...before they meet the one. But if they're lucky, 177 00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:36,657 they can go off and fuck millions of others, like we do. 178 00:06:36,700 --> 00:06:38,876 Don't think that was the case with my parents. 179 00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:39,921 Tell us more about that. 180 00:06:39,964 --> 00:06:41,575 You really want to know? 181 00:06:41,618 --> 00:06:42,880 - Yeah, yeah. Yes. - Mm. 182 00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:46,188 Uh, well, yeah. 183 00:06:46,231 --> 00:06:48,886 It is tough. I mean, I remember being ten or 11 184 00:06:48,930 --> 00:06:51,367 - when I first realized that I was... 185 00:06:51,411 --> 00:06:54,457 Frankie put glass in the piccata and the restaurant comped us, 186 00:06:54,501 --> 00:06:56,503 so we got all these chips. Let's hit the casino. 187 00:06:56,546 --> 00:06:58,505 - All right. - Come on, Nadia. Let's go watch this Rat Pack show 188 00:06:58,548 --> 00:07:00,507 - with the girls. - Did you say "the Rat Pack"? 189 00:07:00,550 --> 00:07:02,073 - Yeah, they're good. - They're here? 190 00:07:02,117 --> 00:07:04,075 Yeah, yeah, it's the Rat Pack. 191 00:07:04,119 --> 00:07:05,686 Chips ahoy! 192 00:07:05,729 --> 00:07:07,775 -- Yeah! 193 00:07:07,818 --> 00:07:09,472 Atlantic City, baby! 194 00:07:12,867 --> 00:07:14,346 - We're actually seeing the Rat Pack? - Yeah! 195 00:07:14,390 --> 00:07:16,131 I couldn't bloody believe it 196 00:07:16,174 --> 00:07:18,089 when Charmaine said we were seeing the Rat Pack. 197 00:07:18,133 --> 00:07:19,961 I mean, what a coincidence. 198 00:07:20,004 --> 00:07:23,051 My old mateys, performing here, tonight! 199 00:07:23,094 --> 00:07:25,488 Oh, we used to have such fun together. 200 00:07:25,532 --> 00:07:28,143 Hanging with the who's who of the local 201 00:07:28,186 --> 00:07:30,014 Cosa Nostra in the back room. 202 00:07:30,058 --> 00:07:31,755 What can I say? 203 00:07:31,799 --> 00:07:33,540 We were just a bunch of night cats, 204 00:07:33,583 --> 00:07:36,325 and nobody was playing for keeps. 205 00:07:36,368 --> 00:07:38,370 -- I used to scream, 206 00:07:38,414 --> 00:07:40,329 "Ain't That a Kick in the Head!" 207 00:07:40,372 --> 00:07:43,419 at every show because it was my favorite number and also, 208 00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:45,813 you know, what a stupid name for a song. 209 00:07:45,856 --> 00:07:48,511 Frankie used to say that they should callme the Voice. 210 00:07:48,555 --> 00:07:50,034 He'd say, uh, 211 00:07:50,078 --> 00:07:52,341 "Nadja, I don't know what's more of a problem, 212 00:07:52,384 --> 00:07:55,823 your voice or my taste in blondes." 213 00:07:55,866 --> 00:07:58,390 - Cheers, ladies! - I love alcohol. 214 00:07:58,434 --> 00:08:00,567 I have to drink it. Um, num, num, num. 215 00:08:00,610 --> 00:08:02,525 -- Okay, here they-they are! 216 00:08:02,569 --> 00:08:04,222 Frankie! Deanie! 217 00:08:04,266 --> 00:08:06,137 Oh, this is amazing for me! 218 00:08:06,181 --> 00:08:08,052 It's me, Nadja! Hello! 219 00:08:08,096 --> 00:08:10,446 ♪ How lucky can one guy be?♪ 220 00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:12,709 Oh, wow. I mean, they haven't changed at all. 221 00:08:12,753 --> 00:08:15,407 Nadja from Antipaxos! Hello! 222 00:08:15,451 --> 00:08:17,540 They did say, uh, "Ring-a-ding-ding" a lot. 223 00:08:17,584 --> 00:08:19,803 - Ring-a-ding-ding! - Which is one of their catchphrases. 224 00:08:19,847 --> 00:08:21,805 It's Nadja! Do you remember?! 225 00:08:21,849 --> 00:08:23,154 All right. 226 00:08:23,198 --> 00:08:24,547 But, you know, crooners 227 00:08:24,591 --> 00:08:25,766 gonna croon. 228 00:08:25,809 --> 00:08:26,941 ♪ Tell me quick♪ 229 00:08:26,984 --> 00:08:28,682 ♪ Ain't that a kick♪ 230 00:08:28,725 --> 00:08:33,164 ♪ In the head...?♪ 231 00:08:33,208 --> 00:08:34,470 Oh, boy. All right. 232 00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:35,950 We got some live ones tonight. 233 00:08:37,299 --> 00:08:38,648 So, who do you guys 234 00:08:38,692 --> 00:08:40,520 favor for Monday night's fight? 235 00:08:40,563 --> 00:08:42,652 -- I understand 236 00:08:42,696 --> 00:08:44,611 you're indicating that you want me to proceed. 237 00:08:44,654 --> 00:08:46,264 But I'm still assessing my cards, 238 00:08:46,308 --> 00:08:47,788 which is within my right. 239 00:08:47,831 --> 00:08:50,834 Rodriguez, of course, has that uppercut. 240 00:08:50,878 --> 00:08:54,142 But Jackson has the reach. 70 inches. That's no slouch. 241 00:08:54,185 --> 00:08:56,144 -- Yes. 242 00:08:56,187 --> 00:08:58,320 - He hasn't moved for hours. 243 00:08:58,363 --> 00:09:00,061 I've actually never seen him like this, to be honest. 244 00:09:00,104 --> 00:09:01,279 Let's go. Come on. 245 00:09:01,323 --> 00:09:04,152 I am playing a game called 246 00:09:04,195 --> 00:09:05,632 The Big Bang Theory game. 247 00:09:05,675 --> 00:09:07,547 So hypnotic. 248 00:09:07,590 --> 00:09:09,592 Really has me in its grips. 249 00:09:11,159 --> 00:09:13,509 Two Leonards and a Raj. I need three Rajs! 250 00:09:13,553 --> 00:09:14,902 Again. 251 00:09:14,945 --> 00:09:16,556 I won! 252 00:09:16,599 --> 00:09:19,515 - Bazinga...! 253 00:09:22,039 --> 00:09:25,129 "Bazinga" is the war cry of Sheldon, 254 00:09:25,173 --> 00:09:27,044 their tall leader. 255 00:09:27,088 --> 00:09:29,264 - I haven't seen them in so long. 256 00:09:29,307 --> 00:09:30,874 Frankie, Deanie, Sammy, 257 00:09:30,918 --> 00:09:32,615 my sweet paisans. 258 00:09:32,659 --> 00:09:33,660 It's me, 259 00:09:33,703 --> 00:09:36,010 it's your "luck be a lady"! 260 00:09:36,053 --> 00:09:37,620 - Oh. - Oh, 261 00:09:37,664 --> 00:09:39,404 you were the aces of clubs tonight. 262 00:09:39,448 --> 00:09:41,189 - Ring-a-ding-ding! 263 00:09:41,232 --> 00:09:42,930 There it is! 264 00:09:42,973 --> 00:09:45,149 I don't think it's gonna be a classic match. 265 00:09:45,193 --> 00:09:46,194 Anyway, it-- Let's see. 266 00:09:46,237 --> 00:09:48,631 We got a six and a fi-- 267 00:09:48,675 --> 00:09:50,894 I don't really know how to play this. 268 00:09:50,938 --> 00:09:52,983 - Come on, Sheldon. - Yeah, I know they're still having fun, 269 00:09:53,027 --> 00:09:54,898 but it's almost sunrise. 270 00:09:54,942 --> 00:09:56,987 It's very important for a bodyguard 271 00:09:57,031 --> 00:09:59,555 to be on top of when it's time for nap-naps. 272 00:09:59,599 --> 00:10:00,904 Do it for me, Raj. 273 00:10:00,948 --> 00:10:02,689 -- They get a little aggravated 274 00:10:02,732 --> 00:10:05,082 - when they don't get their night... - Fucking game! 275 00:10:06,736 --> 00:10:08,433 See? 276 00:10:08,477 --> 00:10:10,740 - Time for night-night. - Come on. Guillermo, not now. 277 00:10:10,784 --> 00:10:13,134 - Give me more quarters. I need more quarters. - No, I think-- I think it's time 278 00:10:13,177 --> 00:10:14,178 - for night-night. - No. 279 00:10:14,222 --> 00:10:15,527 The sun is about to come up. 280 00:10:15,571 --> 00:10:17,268 - You can't make me. - Aw. Come on. 281 00:10:17,312 --> 00:10:19,053 - No, these are my new friends. - We should go. 282 00:10:19,096 --> 00:10:20,532 - This way. Over here. This way. - What does this one do? 283 00:10:20,576 --> 00:10:21,751 No, it doesn't do anything. 284 00:10:24,885 --> 00:10:26,843 I still cannot slumber. 285 00:10:26,887 --> 00:10:28,845 Colin Robinson, are you slumbering? 286 00:10:28,889 --> 00:10:30,891 No. And stop asking me. 287 00:10:30,934 --> 00:10:32,806 Are you slumbering in there?! 288 00:10:32,849 --> 00:10:35,417 We are having a very hard time trying to slumber! 289 00:10:35,460 --> 00:10:38,159 Yes, we are also unable to slumber! 290 00:10:38,202 --> 00:10:39,769 Guillermo, are you slumbering? 291 00:10:39,813 --> 00:10:41,684 Guillermo. 292 00:10:41,728 --> 00:10:45,209 Guillermo, wake up! I asked you, are you slumbering? 293 00:10:46,384 --> 00:10:48,343 What is this? 294 00:10:48,386 --> 00:10:49,823 Oh, shit. 295 00:10:49,866 --> 00:10:51,389 Shit. No. 296 00:10:52,434 --> 00:10:54,262 Shit. Shit! 297 00:10:54,305 --> 00:10:55,698 My ancestral soil! 298 00:10:55,742 --> 00:10:57,091 It is gone! 299 00:10:57,134 --> 00:10:59,136 Our ancestral soil is also gone! 300 00:10:59,180 --> 00:11:01,878 What the piss in hell is happening?! 301 00:11:01,922 --> 00:11:04,098 You know how it is when you have 302 00:11:04,141 --> 00:11:06,404 the binge-watch blinders on. 303 00:11:06,448 --> 00:11:09,190 I got caught up in a show that I'm obsessed with, 304 00:11:09,233 --> 00:11:10,191 and they only air it 305 00:11:10,234 --> 00:11:12,106 here at the hotel. 306 00:11:12,149 --> 00:11:13,585 ♪ Roll the dice♪ 307 00:11:13,629 --> 00:11:15,109 ♪ Spin that wheel...♪ 308 00:11:15,152 --> 00:11:17,720 Anyway, housekeeping came in, and... 309 00:11:17,764 --> 00:11:19,766 I-I didn't notice what she was doing. 310 00:11:19,809 --> 00:11:21,419 ♪ The sushi's raw♪ 311 00:11:21,463 --> 00:11:24,422 ♪ Catch a show and hit the spa.♪ 312 00:11:25,815 --> 00:11:27,861 - This is very bad. - "Very bad"?! 313 00:11:27,904 --> 00:11:29,732 This is a fucking catastrophe! 314 00:11:29,776 --> 00:11:31,516 If our ancestral soil is gone, 315 00:11:31,560 --> 00:11:33,301 then we cannot rest! If we cannot rest, 316 00:11:33,344 --> 00:11:34,389 then our powers... 317 00:11:34,432 --> 00:11:35,869 I can't even say it. 318 00:11:35,912 --> 00:11:38,001 Our powers are poof! Gone! 319 00:11:38,045 --> 00:11:39,699 I can feel my powers fading. 320 00:11:39,742 --> 00:11:40,830 Bat! 321 00:11:42,745 --> 00:11:44,747 A fucking sparrow. 322 00:11:44,791 --> 00:11:46,618 -- The lamest of all birds. 323 00:11:46,662 --> 00:11:47,924 There is but one solution. 324 00:11:47,968 --> 00:11:49,665 Guillermo, 325 00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:51,972 you must go on a journey, 326 00:11:52,015 --> 00:11:53,016 a quest. 327 00:11:53,060 --> 00:11:54,322 How do you feel about that? 328 00:11:54,365 --> 00:11:55,410 Uh... 329 00:11:55,453 --> 00:11:56,933 Good. Will the roads 330 00:11:56,977 --> 00:11:59,283 - be treacherous? Yes. - Yes. - Yes! 331 00:11:59,327 --> 00:12:00,589 - Maybe I shouldn't... - Will there 332 00:12:00,632 --> 00:12:02,069 be foes at every turn? 333 00:12:02,112 --> 00:12:03,766 - Most certainly. - Yes. Yes. 334 00:12:03,810 --> 00:12:05,376 - I have a lot of enemies. - Don't like that. 335 00:12:05,420 --> 00:12:07,901 But you are the only one that can save us. 336 00:12:07,944 --> 00:12:09,076 Are you man enough? 337 00:12:09,119 --> 00:12:10,077 Uh... 338 00:12:10,120 --> 00:12:11,252 Good. 339 00:12:11,295 --> 00:12:12,819 - He's my best friend. - Please. 340 00:12:12,862 --> 00:12:14,168 No, I'm your best friend. 341 00:12:14,211 --> 00:12:15,735 My hypnosis powers are buggered. 342 00:12:15,778 --> 00:12:17,388 So I have to look elsewhere 343 00:12:17,432 --> 00:12:19,564 to secure Gizmo's travel money. 344 00:12:19,608 --> 00:12:23,351 Could this ruin the greatest friendship of my life? 345 00:12:23,394 --> 00:12:25,788 - Seanie! - Hey. 346 00:12:25,832 --> 00:12:28,356 Hey, Laz. What are you doing?! Get the "D" back! 347 00:12:28,399 --> 00:12:31,228 I need to borrow your credit card and not tell you why. 348 00:12:32,229 --> 00:12:34,188 You can't tell me why 349 00:12:34,231 --> 00:12:36,016 you need to borrow my credit card? 350 00:12:37,060 --> 00:12:39,410 No explanation necessary. 351 00:12:39,454 --> 00:12:41,064 - Really? - You're my best friend. 352 00:12:41,108 --> 00:12:43,153 Oh, Marone. Are you kidding me? 353 00:12:43,197 --> 00:12:45,155 Fucking Knicks. They'll break your heart every time. 354 00:12:45,199 --> 00:12:46,809 But I can't quit 'em. You know what I mean? 355 00:12:46,853 --> 00:12:47,767 Yeah. - Hey, listen, you're gonna have 356 00:12:47,810 --> 00:12:48,724 to pay me back, like, 357 00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:50,334 right away. ASAP, okay? 358 00:12:50,378 --> 00:12:53,381 'Cause the Patrick Ewing commemorative Discover Card, 359 00:12:53,424 --> 00:12:54,730 that's for emergencies only. 360 00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:56,558 Get it back soon. Listen, I trust you. 361 00:12:56,601 --> 00:12:58,212 You're my main man. I'd die for you. 362 00:12:58,255 --> 00:12:59,648 -- Thanks again. 363 00:13:01,563 --> 00:13:04,522 Yeah, I know that collecting dirt is shit work, but... 364 00:13:04,566 --> 00:13:06,829 I've never been to Europe before, so... 365 00:13:09,353 --> 00:13:10,790 - Seanie. - Yeah. 366 00:13:10,833 --> 00:13:13,531 The past 20 years have not always been easy. 367 00:13:13,575 --> 00:13:16,143 We are trapped in an eternal limbo 368 00:13:16,186 --> 00:13:19,668 at the Monaco Grand Hotel and Casino facility. 369 00:13:19,711 --> 00:13:21,235 ...our roses and our thorns. 370 00:13:21,278 --> 00:13:22,932 Oh, look at that. 371 00:13:22,976 --> 00:13:25,848 Oh, she already drank so much. 372 00:13:25,892 --> 00:13:27,545 Our powers are waning, and our minds 373 00:13:27,589 --> 00:13:30,026 are turning into a thick, lumpy soup. 374 00:13:30,070 --> 00:13:31,549 Yes, you have to say you're... 375 00:13:31,593 --> 00:13:34,814 It is like hot onion water. 376 00:13:34,857 --> 00:13:37,860 And then you put that in my head and that's my brain now. 377 00:13:37,904 --> 00:13:38,861 In the name 378 00:13:38,905 --> 00:13:39,862 of Jesus Christ. 379 00:13:41,864 --> 00:13:43,997 As the pages fall from the calendar, 380 00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:45,868 we can do nothing but wait... 381 00:13:45,912 --> 00:13:47,870 - No! 382 00:13:47,914 --> 00:13:50,699 ...amongst the broken tulips 383 00:13:50,742 --> 00:13:52,396 in the Garden State. 384 00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:54,268 Vow renewal 385 00:13:54,311 --> 00:13:55,878 ceremonies. 386 00:13:55,922 --> 00:13:57,880 Too long. They're too long. 387 00:13:57,924 --> 00:13:59,839 And I pronounce you man and wife. 388 00:13:59,882 --> 00:14:01,057 Pointless. 389 00:14:01,101 --> 00:14:02,711 It has been weeks since any of us 390 00:14:02,754 --> 00:14:05,105 have had even a moment of slumber. 391 00:14:05,148 --> 00:14:07,542 It's actually been only, like, 14 hours, 392 00:14:07,585 --> 00:14:09,544 but they get a little punchy 393 00:14:09,587 --> 00:14:11,285 when they don't get their sleep. 394 00:14:11,328 --> 00:14:12,808 Three, two, one. 395 00:14:12,852 --> 00:14:14,549 - Cheese. - Cheese. Let's do it. 396 00:14:14,592 --> 00:14:16,246 Cheese! 397 00:14:16,290 --> 00:14:19,771 Okay, here we are in... jolly ole England. 398 00:14:19,815 --> 00:14:21,164 I'm in London, mate. 399 00:14:21,208 --> 00:14:22,383 Oh, that's not good. 400 00:14:22,426 --> 00:14:23,688 Just got to get this dirt. 401 00:14:23,732 --> 00:14:25,168 So I'm gonna put you guys down here. 402 00:14:25,212 --> 00:14:28,345 I'm just here for British dirt for Laszlo. 403 00:14:28,389 --> 00:14:29,825 All right. 404 00:14:29,869 --> 00:14:32,001 Back on the plane. 405 00:14:32,045 --> 00:14:34,874 This Big Bang Theory is really very good. - Bazinga. 406 00:14:34,917 --> 00:14:37,093 Very faithful to the slot machine. 407 00:14:37,137 --> 00:14:38,703 - Yeah. - Yeah. - For the last time, 408 00:14:38,747 --> 00:14:43,752 can you turn this TV down?! 409 00:14:43,795 --> 00:14:46,668 Laszlo can be a real Leonard sometimes, 410 00:14:46,711 --> 00:14:48,148 - can't he? - Mm-hmm. 411 00:14:48,191 --> 00:14:50,063 Laszlo is feeling very badly 412 00:14:50,106 --> 00:14:54,023 for taking $7,539 413 00:14:54,067 --> 00:14:56,896 from Sean for the airplane tickets. 414 00:14:56,939 --> 00:14:58,114 Like a cheap thief. 415 00:14:58,158 --> 00:14:59,550 - I need to sort this... - Yeah. 416 00:14:59,594 --> 00:15:01,117 ...and I need to sort it now. 417 00:15:01,161 --> 00:15:02,379 Bazinga! 418 00:15:02,423 --> 00:15:04,033 Shut up! 419 00:15:04,077 --> 00:15:06,035 What are you doing, playing Ping-Pong or basketball?! 420 00:15:06,079 --> 00:15:07,907 - Come on! - Seanie... 421 00:15:07,950 --> 00:15:09,212 Yeah. Hey, Laz. 422 00:15:09,256 --> 00:15:10,344 Good to see you. 423 00:15:10,387 --> 00:15:11,388 Fuck! Fuck me! 424 00:15:11,432 --> 00:15:13,390 Are you fucking kidding me?! 425 00:15:13,434 --> 00:15:15,479 Learn how to use the board! 426 00:15:15,523 --> 00:15:16,480 Geez... 427 00:15:16,524 --> 00:15:18,004 - Are you okay? 428 00:15:18,047 --> 00:15:19,875 Listen, Laz, can I be honest with you? 429 00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:20,963 Of course. 430 00:15:21,007 --> 00:15:23,139 I used to have a... 431 00:15:23,183 --> 00:15:25,011 big-time gambling problem. 432 00:15:25,054 --> 00:15:26,795 - Right. - Like, big-time. You know, I promised Charmaine, 433 00:15:26,838 --> 00:15:29,058 you know, I said, "Hey, listen, we go down to AC, 434 00:15:29,102 --> 00:15:31,017 - I'll be good this time." - Right. 435 00:15:31,060 --> 00:15:32,670 And then I have just blown all the money 436 00:15:32,714 --> 00:15:34,759 that we were gonna use for the new deck. 437 00:15:34,803 --> 00:15:37,545 And we still owe money for that stupid vow renewal. 438 00:15:37,588 --> 00:15:39,112 And I've lost all of our money. 439 00:15:39,155 --> 00:15:41,157 There's no money, Laz. 440 00:15:41,201 --> 00:15:42,637 I got to make it back. 441 00:15:44,378 --> 00:15:45,901 Hey, hey, hey, hey. 442 00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:48,730 She's gonna leave me, Laz. 443 00:15:48,773 --> 00:15:49,992 She's gonna leave me. 444 00:15:50,036 --> 00:15:52,473 - Yeah, yeah. 445 00:15:52,516 --> 00:15:55,911 What good is some soil from your homeland 446 00:15:55,955 --> 00:15:59,045 when your best friend in the whole world is suffering? 447 00:15:59,088 --> 00:16:01,525 Seanie...! 448 00:16:02,483 --> 00:16:04,050 And then it hit me. 449 00:16:04,093 --> 00:16:06,791 I know a few bambinos who are absolutely rolling 450 00:16:06,835 --> 00:16:08,358 in the dough-re-mi. 451 00:16:08,402 --> 00:16:10,578 Surely they won't miss a few clams. 452 00:16:10,621 --> 00:16:13,102 Oh, this has been such a scream, 453 00:16:13,146 --> 00:16:16,018 catching up with you old so-and-sos. 454 00:16:16,062 --> 00:16:18,542 Unfortunately, I cannot hypnotize them 455 00:16:18,586 --> 00:16:20,501 due to my weakened state. But... 456 00:16:20,544 --> 00:16:24,679 I can definitely use my greatest non-vampiric power, 457 00:16:24,722 --> 00:16:27,464 my irresistible charms. 458 00:16:27,508 --> 00:16:30,598 How's about you guys give me all the money you have? 459 00:16:30,641 --> 00:16:31,468 Hey, boys? 460 00:16:31,512 --> 00:16:33,035 I don't think so, sugar. 461 00:16:33,079 --> 00:16:35,211 You don't think so? 462 00:16:35,255 --> 00:16:36,865 Well, I do think so! 463 00:16:36,908 --> 00:16:39,433 'Cause if you don't empty your motherfucking wallets 464 00:16:39,476 --> 00:16:40,869 right now, I'm going 465 00:16:40,912 --> 00:16:42,914 to empty all of you of your lives! 466 00:16:42,958 --> 00:16:44,873 Kill you! Kill you dead! 467 00:16:44,916 --> 00:16:46,831 That's right. 468 00:16:46,875 --> 00:16:47,919 Uh... 469 00:16:47,963 --> 00:16:50,270 Just do it. She's... not well. 470 00:16:50,313 --> 00:16:53,360 - Yeah. - Here you go, sugar. My sweet maraschino 471 00:16:53,403 --> 00:16:55,536 - cherry babies. - Bye. - Yeah. 472 00:16:55,579 --> 00:16:57,581 - Laszlo, get the fuck out of here. - Yeah, yeah. I say, 473 00:16:57,625 --> 00:16:59,061 Mr. Sinatra, 474 00:16:59,105 --> 00:17:01,150 forgive me, my mind's a little foggy, but... 475 00:17:01,194 --> 00:17:02,586 last time I looked, 476 00:17:02,630 --> 00:17:04,632 you weren't Chinese. 477 00:17:05,894 --> 00:17:07,069 Ring-a-ding-ding. 478 00:17:07,113 --> 00:17:09,071 I stand corrected. 479 00:17:09,115 --> 00:17:12,205 You guys work with those people? I need that dough. 480 00:17:13,554 --> 00:17:14,816 Here we go. 481 00:17:14,859 --> 00:17:16,513 Okay. 482 00:17:16,557 --> 00:17:17,514 $20. 483 00:17:17,558 --> 00:17:19,342 $100. What? 484 00:17:19,386 --> 00:17:21,344 This is about $300. 485 00:17:21,388 --> 00:17:24,478 - Oh, fucking... - 300 shitting dollars! 486 00:17:24,521 --> 00:17:26,045 My darling, don't explode, 487 00:17:26,088 --> 00:17:28,438 but are you quite sure they're the real Rat Pack 488 00:17:28,482 --> 00:17:29,874 that you met years ago? 489 00:17:29,918 --> 00:17:32,007 What exactly are you trying to say? 490 00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:33,574 Nothing. All good. 491 00:17:33,617 --> 00:17:36,185 Hello. I'm in Greece. 492 00:17:40,363 --> 00:17:42,539 Aeropuerto-- airport-- can we go to the airport, please? 493 00:17:42,583 --> 00:17:44,063 Thank you. 494 00:17:46,543 --> 00:17:47,631 Hey. 495 00:17:47,675 --> 00:17:49,416 Look at that. 496 00:17:49,459 --> 00:17:51,766 You got a couple Koothrappalis, 497 00:17:51,809 --> 00:17:54,247 a Hofstadter, and four Wolowitzes. 498 00:17:54,290 --> 00:17:56,031 Oh, and Penny. Not bad. 499 00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:58,512 Do you know what I have been wondering, Colin Robinson? 500 00:17:58,555 --> 00:18:03,082 - What's that? - Why do they call it The Big Bang Theory? 501 00:18:03,125 --> 00:18:05,606 It's about the creation of the universe. 502 00:18:05,649 --> 00:18:07,869 The what? 503 00:18:07,912 --> 00:18:09,566 And in 504 00:18:09,610 --> 00:18:10,828 a single instant, 505 00:18:10,872 --> 00:18:13,918 my world was turned upside down. 506 00:18:13,962 --> 00:18:16,660 ...hence the Shaminovich-Cohen conjecture. 507 00:18:16,704 --> 00:18:19,315 I-I gave him the broad strokes, 508 00:18:19,359 --> 00:18:21,448 the heliocentric nuts and bolts, 509 00:18:21,491 --> 00:18:22,971 uh, if you will. 510 00:18:23,014 --> 00:18:24,929 Has nothing to do with cats, like you thought. 511 00:18:24,973 --> 00:18:26,931 But what about the four elephants? 512 00:18:26,975 --> 00:18:29,064 For 750 years, 513 00:18:29,108 --> 00:18:31,153 I believed I knew the truth: 514 00:18:31,197 --> 00:18:33,242 that the Earth rested upon the shoulders 515 00:18:33,286 --> 00:18:35,679 of four mighty elephants... 516 00:18:35,723 --> 00:18:37,464 Forget about the four elephants. 517 00:18:37,507 --> 00:18:40,336 ...who stood on a shell of a large and noble turtle. 518 00:18:40,380 --> 00:18:41,468 Look at the turtle. 519 00:18:41,511 --> 00:18:42,904 - Uh-huh. - And then 520 00:18:42,947 --> 00:18:44,514 - four more elephants. -...around which 521 00:18:44,558 --> 00:18:47,865 the sun and the moon and all the stars revolve. 522 00:18:47,909 --> 00:18:51,042 But now, thanks to modern science, 523 00:18:51,086 --> 00:18:54,611 Nandor understands that we're all just temporary aggregations 524 00:18:54,655 --> 00:18:56,396 of dust and fluid 525 00:18:56,439 --> 00:18:58,180 camping out on a big rock 526 00:18:58,224 --> 00:19:00,574 that's just one of an infinite number 527 00:19:00,617 --> 00:19:02,010 of equally unspecial 528 00:19:02,053 --> 00:19:05,318 big rocks that make up part 529 00:19:05,361 --> 00:19:07,624 of this vast and uncaring universe. 530 00:19:07,668 --> 00:19:09,017 This is science. 531 00:19:09,060 --> 00:19:11,150 - But this is a turtle. - The world 532 00:19:11,193 --> 00:19:14,979 which I have known for seven and a half centuries... 533 00:19:15,023 --> 00:19:17,068 is a lie. 534 00:19:21,464 --> 00:19:22,857 Okay, so we're here at the border, 535 00:19:22,900 --> 00:19:24,641 and he's just talking to the soldier. 536 00:19:24,685 --> 00:19:26,165 While he's doing that, I'm gonna go... 537 00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:27,427 Okay. 538 00:19:27,470 --> 00:19:29,037 Just gonna get some dirt right here. 539 00:19:29,080 --> 00:19:30,256 Just gonna get... 540 00:19:30,299 --> 00:19:32,214 We got to go. 541 00:19:33,650 --> 00:19:35,217 Hours pass, 542 00:19:35,261 --> 00:19:37,350 but the cosmic words of Colin Robinson 543 00:19:37,393 --> 00:19:40,396 are still bouncing around my slumberless head. 544 00:19:40,440 --> 00:19:42,572 Really makes you think. 545 00:19:42,616 --> 00:19:45,401 What's the point of it all? 546 00:19:45,445 --> 00:19:47,751 What does it mean to be a vampire? 547 00:19:47,795 --> 00:19:50,754 I mean, we have no real families. 548 00:19:50,798 --> 00:19:53,670 Some of us don't even have girlfriends. 549 00:19:53,714 --> 00:19:56,934 Even Sheldon had a girlfriend. 550 00:19:56,978 --> 00:19:58,284 But me? 551 00:19:58,327 --> 00:20:00,111 I am all alone, 552 00:20:00,155 --> 00:20:03,811 floating through the cold, dark universe like... 553 00:20:03,854 --> 00:20:06,422 a little grain of furry sand. 554 00:20:10,774 --> 00:20:12,254 I got 'em. 555 00:20:12,298 --> 00:20:14,038 One, two, three. 556 00:20:14,082 --> 00:20:15,039 - I got them al... - Something to drink? 557 00:20:15,083 --> 00:20:16,650 No, thank you! 558 00:20:19,870 --> 00:20:21,742 I'm back! And I brought every-- 559 00:20:21,785 --> 00:20:24,135 What happened... here? 560 00:20:24,179 --> 00:20:26,964 I have caused my best human friend Sean 561 00:20:27,008 --> 00:20:29,880 to be on the brink of financial ruin and heartache. 562 00:20:29,924 --> 00:20:32,187 We are just like my beloved Rat Pack-- 563 00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:34,711 once glorious, now pathetic peasants. 564 00:20:34,755 --> 00:20:36,800 And, also, I have never felt 565 00:20:36,844 --> 00:20:39,542 so small, and what is the point of anything? 566 00:20:39,586 --> 00:20:41,457 They won't let me watch my favorite TV show 567 00:20:41,501 --> 00:20:42,632 with the sound up. 568 00:20:42,676 --> 00:20:44,678 Okay. 569 00:20:44,721 --> 00:20:47,028 First things first, you need to slumber. 570 00:20:47,071 --> 00:20:49,465 Huh? - Here you go. And while you're slumbering, 571 00:20:49,509 --> 00:20:52,076 - I'll think of a plan. - But, first, 572 00:20:52,120 --> 00:20:55,166 scatter the soil around our insignificant bodies. 573 00:20:55,210 --> 00:20:58,474 No. First, turn up the sound on my fancy casino show. 574 00:21:00,041 --> 00:21:01,695 - ♪ Roll the dice♪ 575 00:21:01,738 --> 00:21:03,436 ♪ Spin that wheel♪ 576 00:21:03,479 --> 00:21:06,221 ♪ Double down on a lucky deal♪ 577 00:21:06,265 --> 00:21:07,918 ♪ Feel the breeze where♪ 578 00:21:07,962 --> 00:21:11,226 ♪ The boardwalk meets the shore...♪ 579 00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:13,097 Before we get started, should we go around the group, 580 00:21:13,141 --> 00:21:14,577 see how everyone's energy is doing? 581 00:21:14,621 --> 00:21:16,840 - No. Fuck off. - Okay. Back to normal then. 582 00:21:16,884 --> 00:21:19,756 So, at 6:47, I'm gonna go down to the box office. 583 00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:21,280 I'm gonna buy our tickets for the fight. 584 00:21:21,323 --> 00:21:23,325 - Yes, Guillermo, we've got it. - Okay, okay. 585 00:21:23,369 --> 00:21:25,240 - Just want to make sure everyone knows what the plan is. - Honestly, 586 00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:26,981 sometimes I just think you love the sound of your own voice. 587 00:21:27,024 --> 00:21:28,548 You know what? Let's go. 588 00:21:28,591 --> 00:21:30,419 Let's-let's do the plan. 589 00:21:30,463 --> 00:21:32,856 I wasn't really listening, so if you wouldn't mind repeating it. 590 00:21:34,336 --> 00:21:36,338 Master, what are you gonna do? 591 00:21:36,382 --> 00:21:39,123 I am to meet my mark-- Eli Jackson the boxer-- 592 00:21:39,167 --> 00:21:42,562 by the main elevator at 6:52 in the p.m.'s. 593 00:21:42,605 --> 00:21:44,825 Shit. 594 00:21:44,868 --> 00:21:46,435 Going down. 595 00:21:46,479 --> 00:21:49,046 Into my hypnotic trance. 596 00:21:50,657 --> 00:21:52,223 - Laszlo? - At 6:55, 597 00:21:52,267 --> 00:21:54,791 I hypnotize "Arturio" Rodriguez. 598 00:21:54,835 --> 00:21:58,317 Mr. Rodriguez, could I have a self-portrait photograph? 599 00:21:59,361 --> 00:22:00,362 Splendid. 600 00:22:01,363 --> 00:22:02,451 Piece of piss. 601 00:22:02,495 --> 00:22:05,149 It is 6:59. 602 00:22:05,193 --> 00:22:07,369 Time to place a nice, simple bet. 603 00:22:07,413 --> 00:22:08,544 Hello! 604 00:22:08,588 --> 00:22:11,025 And in the red corner, 605 00:22:11,068 --> 00:22:12,896 - heavyweight champion... And at 8:00 p.m., we all take our seats 606 00:22:12,940 --> 00:22:14,115 at the fight. 607 00:22:16,073 --> 00:22:18,902 Ten seconds into round six, 608 00:22:18,946 --> 00:22:19,903 I trigger the hypnosis of the two 609 00:22:19,947 --> 00:22:20,904 very large warrior men 610 00:22:20,948 --> 00:22:22,210 by crying out... 611 00:22:22,253 --> 00:22:24,734 ♪ Ain't that a kick in the♪ 612 00:22:24,778 --> 00:22:27,824 ♪ Head...?♪ 613 00:22:31,480 --> 00:22:32,568 - No! 614 00:22:32,612 --> 00:22:35,179 - It worked! - Yes! 615 00:22:35,223 --> 00:22:37,094 - Look at that! - Yes! 616 00:22:37,138 --> 00:22:40,315 And that is why Frankie said that I should be the Voice. 617 00:22:42,665 --> 00:22:45,059 23... 618 00:22:45,102 --> 00:22:46,452 Benjamin Franklin. 619 00:22:46,495 --> 00:22:48,715 A lot of people think he was president. 620 00:22:48,758 --> 00:22:50,238 They're wrong. He was an ambassador. 621 00:22:50,281 --> 00:22:51,761 24... Stay with me. 622 00:22:51,805 --> 00:22:53,415 Stay-- I-- 623 00:22:53,459 --> 00:22:55,896 Shoot. Now I lost my spot. 624 00:22:55,939 --> 00:22:58,420 - Uh, how does it...? - You have to step on it. 625 00:22:58,464 --> 00:23:00,204 - I'm on. I'm on! - Just... 626 00:23:00,248 --> 00:23:02,293 - What is happening? Am I flying? - Just hold on to this. 627 00:23:02,337 --> 00:23:04,165 - Possessed by witches. - Nadja, turn around, turn around. 628 00:23:04,208 --> 00:23:05,427 - Jump, jump, jump, jump. - Keep moving. Leap. 629 00:23:05,471 --> 00:23:07,864 There he is. Sean. 630 00:23:07,908 --> 00:23:09,213 Hey, Laz. What's going on? 631 00:23:09,257 --> 00:23:10,476 A gentleman's debt, 632 00:23:10,519 --> 00:23:13,435 repaid in full. 633 00:23:13,479 --> 00:23:15,872 Oh! 634 00:23:15,916 --> 00:23:17,483 Oh, my God! 635 00:23:17,526 --> 00:23:19,354 Laz, you're a lifesaver! 636 00:23:19,398 --> 00:23:21,443 Thank you. You don't know what you just did. 637 00:23:21,487 --> 00:23:23,489 I could kiss you. And I promise you, 638 00:23:23,532 --> 00:23:25,795 I'm never, ever, ever gonna do this again. 639 00:23:25,839 --> 00:23:27,536 - I promise you guys. That's it. I'm done. - Mm. 640 00:23:27,580 --> 00:23:29,886 - I'm never gambling again. I'm a new man. - Good. 641 00:23:29,930 --> 00:23:31,975 - Good man. - All right. You guys are lifesavers. 642 00:23:32,019 --> 00:23:34,108 - Oh, thank God. - We just did such a wonderful thing, my love. 643 00:23:34,151 --> 00:23:35,936 I think we did. 644 00:23:41,202 --> 00:23:44,248 Put it all on lucky number 12! 645 00:23:44,292 --> 00:23:48,905 ♪ Life spins like a wheel♪ 646 00:23:48,949 --> 00:23:50,559 ♪ You bet♪ 647 00:23:50,603 --> 00:23:53,257 ♪ Just what you feel♪ 648 00:23:53,301 --> 00:23:55,912 ♪ The chance♪ 649 00:23:55,956 --> 00:23:58,567 ♪ Life is the chance...♪ 650 00:23:58,611 --> 00:24:00,264 I didn't want a pine deck, and now I'm stuck 651 00:24:00,308 --> 00:24:01,352 with a freakin' pine deck. 652 00:24:01,396 --> 00:24:03,442 Oh, that's a hell of a beaver. 653 00:24:03,485 --> 00:24:04,965 - Charmaine... What the fuck? You bet the deck? 654 00:24:05,008 --> 00:24:06,749 You did a very good job, Guillermo. 655 00:24:06,793 --> 00:24:08,272 Oh. Thank you. 656 00:24:08,316 --> 00:24:10,753 This is from all of us. 657 00:24:11,928 --> 00:24:12,929 What-what is this? 658 00:24:12,973 --> 00:24:14,365 Surprise. 659 00:24:14,409 --> 00:24:16,629 "You are a very good familiar." 660 00:24:16,672 --> 00:24:19,936 And "familiar" is crossed out and replaced with "bodyguard." 661 00:24:19,980 --> 00:24:21,547 - You are the bodyguard. - Bodyguard. 662 00:24:21,590 --> 00:24:23,462 We're all a big family here. 663 00:24:45,092 --> 00:24:47,529 ♪ With the turn of a card and the flip of a coin♪ 664 00:24:47,573 --> 00:24:49,052 ♪ You're in love♪ 665 00:24:50,097 --> 00:24:53,056 ♪ With the turn of a card, ha♪ 666 00:24:53,100 --> 00:24:55,058 ♪ Flip of a coin, ha♪ 667 00:24:55,102 --> 00:24:57,104 ♪ Ha, love!♪ 668 00:25:40,321 --> 00:25:45,544 I did not have sexual relations with that woman. 669 00:25:53,595 --> 00:25:56,990 I think this is gonna be the perfect place to work without distraction. 670 00:25:57,599 --> 00:25:59,862 This place inspires us. 671 00:26:02,517 --> 00:26:03,866 We're not safe here. 672 00:26:05,389 --> 00:26:08,436 It takes pain to make beautiful things. 673 00:26:08,479 --> 00:26:10,481 I'm trying to keep his family together 674 00:26:10,525 --> 00:26:13,310 under very difficult circumstances 675 00:26:23,625 --> 00:26:25,409 You're probably wondering what we're doing. 676 00:26:25,453 --> 00:26:26,933 Short answer, saving the earth. 677 00:26:26,976 --> 00:26:28,587 Again. 678 00:26:28,630 --> 00:26:29,805 I'm not leaving without you. 679 00:26:29,849 --> 00:26:32,112 I need something soft to land on. 680 00:26:39,032 --> 00:26:41,991 We've heard rumors that some men survived. 681 00:26:42,035 --> 00:26:43,906 Those people will jump at anything 682 00:26:43,950 --> 00:26:45,778 that has a whiff of conspiracy. 683 00:26:45,821 --> 00:26:46,953 So you'd better be sure.