(swishing)
It's 1 :00. It's 1 :00 in the afternoon.
I got a game!
What the hell happened to the alarm? I'm supposed to be on the ice.
You say, nein.
(woman speaks German)
- Yeah, nine. 9:00. What happened? - Yeah, nein.
Badge. Shirt.
You say, "Nein alarm." Is mistake?
No. No mistake.
This is great. Late for the Olympics. I'm just about four hours late, Rita.
- "Rita"? - I don't believe this.
(laughs) "Rita"?
- Leta? - "Leta"?
Anita.
Namen, Gita.
Gita!
(grunts)
(classical music plays)
- (man) This is the Olympics, Kate. - (groaning)
Thirty million people called their families in from the kitchen
to watch the replay. What do you think this is, Kate?
Junior Pairs '82?
No. As I recall, in '82 you were still humiliating me in private.
Maybe because you were still listening.
If I'm going deaf, it's because I've had you screaming in my ear for nine years!
He's not giving me anything to work with.
Rick, this is impossible.
I wanna see your ass in the air.
Until Hercules here learns how to lock his grip, this will have to do.
(laughter)
- (man) Name, son? - Dorsey, US hockey.
(man) Hell, son, they're just about to start.
Kate, this has to stop right now.
Rick knows what's best, honey. He got us here.
How sweet. He lets us tag along.
You're gonna go back out there, you're going to apologize
and you're gonna get to work.
I wouldn't bet the ranch, Dad.
- Where do you think you're going? - (Kate) I'll be in my cell.
(♪ "The Star-Spangled Banner")
(grunting)
(Kate) What... What are you...?
Does this go up to the ice? Does this go up to the ice?
- What? - Does this go up to the ice?
Is that all you have to say? Were you raised in a barn?
Honey, where I'm from, we stand for the national anthem.
(announcer) If you're just joining us from the men's downhill,
you're in for a big surprise.
West Germany was supposed to be an easy game for the United States,
but here in the third period and West Germany is up by a goal.
Doug Dorsey, just about down to the last dime of a two-minute penalty
- for high-sticking. He can't wait. - Come on!
- Neither can the fans. - Come on.
(crowd) Four, three, two, one.
(announcer) Dorsey running out of the box. They'll hit him with the breakaway.
It's offside.
Doug Dorsey, the phenom from Mayhorn, Minnesota.
(announcer 2) What a super story. Here's a junior from Minnesota State.
Talk about being on the fast track.
There are at least 12 NHL clubs
that would love him on their roster before the season's over.
An incredible young athlete. If you haven't seen him before,
you're in for a real treat.
(announcer 1) No question, we're talking about one of the finest
in amateur hockey today.
There was a piece this week. One writer called him the "Minnesota Machine".
(crowd chanting) USA, USA, USA!
(crowd cheering)
(grunting)
(classical music plays)
(whimpering)
(cameras clicking)
(man) For the record...
...you've lost 18 degrees of peripheral vision in your right eye.
Now, in most cases, this would be considered an inconvenience.
- But for a hockey player... - So how long before it comes back?
You've had extreme trauma to your occipital lobe.
Doc, how long?
You got a blind side, Doug.
It's a permanent condition.
- So there's an operation, right? - I'm afraid not.
Some micro-laser thing. You open me up and...
Doug, I've specialized in ophthalmic surgery for over 15 years.
OK, you don't do it, but somebody, somewhere.
Down in Mexico City, they shoot shark piss up your nose,
make you sit in traction for eight months.
Doug... I'm sorry.
I don't see professional hockey in your future.
- See you at the game tonight, Doug. - Not if I see you first.
- See you, Mike. - Mike.
- Anybody seen my wife? - See you guys later.
(woman on radio) Ice-time meltdown.
You're listening to WICV, Duluth, Minnesota.
We're gonna warm you up...
- Hi, Doug. - In a hurry. Any mail?
- No. - I got a game. Make me a sandwich.
Hey, little brother, Snyder can't make it. I need a hand.
- I got a game. - Hi, Dougie.
- It's Friday night. - Make me a sandwich.
- I need a hand. - I need a sandwich.
Dougie, wait a minute.
Doug, I got no place else to go.
You're my brother, not my boss, OK?
Douglas, I'm not asking you, I'm telling you.
Will you get off my back? I'm no bartender. Get used to it.
What the hell's that supposed to mean? What makes you so special?
You're playing in a goddamn bar league.
Hey, Walt, at least I'm playing.
Hey. Your twenty-third letter? Arrived today.
Detroit Red Wings.
It's over, little brother. Everybody knows it but you.
- Give me that. - "Doug, sorry about the eye.
- Next time you're in town, call." - Give me that letter.
- "We'll buy you a ticket." - Give me that goddamn letter!
What are you gonna do?! You gonna fight me?
Are you gonna fight the world? Everybody?
Well, put me on the list, pal. Come on, let's go.
You want something to eat, make it yourself.
(ice swishing)
(man) All right, Kate. Enough.
Lovely. Let's do it again.
Do we or do we not have eight minutes left?
Enough for today.
Perhaps you are wanting to take shower?
All right.
What he needs is a ride to the airport.
I've got laundry that can skate better than that.
He lasted a month.
You should've been making her singles skater.
So where do we go from here?
Two years, eight partners.
This one too small. That one too big. Too loud.
Too much sweat. Not enough sweat.
Jack, she is tremendous skater. Everyone is saying this.
Petite. Powerful. Intelligent.
But always is coming the big "B".
What a bitch.
- What about Spindler? - Spindler?
Spindler say before he skate with her
he wear garlic from neck and sleep with cross.
Who is left? (speaks Russian)
I am at bottom of barrel.
Then you find another barrel.
(rock music plays)
You are bigger than I think.
- What? - You are much bigger than I think.
I'm spending much time watching video of you, Mr. Douglas Dorsey.
You are very exciting skater.
Look, if you're a reporter, you're a little late. The story's been done.
No. I am coach.
What's the deal? You goof on me, my brother buys you a beer?
What means "goof"?
- Are you the Swede? - No, I'm Russian.
My name is Anton Pamchenko.
From the Leafs. I can't believe it. You got my letter.
You couldn't have come at a better time. I'm in the best shape of my life.
I'm skating five, six hours a night, speed drills, stick drills, roadwork.
I am not hockey coach.
- What is this? - Maybe nothing.
Here... You try.
(horn honking)
Those are figure skates, pal.
Whoa! I should've held out for more.
This way.
(classical piano music plays)
- You got your own rink. - We have ice every day.
That's not Spindler.
Where the hell is Spindler?
- I thought you said he'd be here. - No. You said Spindler.
This is Dorsey. Mr. Douglas Dorsey.
- Dorsey? Never heard of him. - Douglas is beautiful skater.
Oh. You're that hockey player.
How you doing?
- Nice to meet you. - (Pamchenko) Is tryout.
Is tryout.
Oh, my God.
What, my hand?
What do you do? Soak them in battery acid?
I know they're rough, but I've never had any complaints before.
Oh, I'm terribly impressed.
What is this, final stages of Ukrainian alcohol psychosis?
Who's checking out who here?
I don't know how many slap shots you've taken to the brain,
but this was your audition. And let me assure you, it's over.
Snow White, I'm no figure skater. I'm a hockey player.
Then what are you doing here?
Get him out of my building.
- What? - Get him out of my building.
Temperamental? I can think of another word for it.
- Is that what you told him? - It's a big secret?
- Who do you think you are? - I know exactly who I am.
A guy who came a long way for lunch.
Please don't let me keep you from the trough.
I'm sorry, buddy. I wouldn't wish this on a snake. I'm out of here.
(shouts in Russian) Enough.
Introduction is over. Conversation finished.
Mouths closed. Ears to be opened.
Pairs means two. You have no partner.
You're skating nowhere.
And where are you going? Oh, back to Siberia?
Skating on small pond is big excitement.
Believe me, Gretzky...
...I am last person who's coming to look for you.
Good.
We skate.
(Pamchenko) You are taking her left hand,
and your right hand is at her waist.
Good. The line is beautiful.
Now, I am counting a beat. You push off on four.
- Katya will lead. - Hey, hold on.
What's the deal with these claws up front here?
- (Pamchenko) Is toe pick. - Toe pick?
Let me guess. It has something to do with personal hygiene.
- I wouldn't let that get in your way. - I don't let anything get in my way.
- Count it off. - (Pamchenko speaks Russian)
And one and four.
Good. Good. Head up.
Yes. Arms up.
Katya, keep in line with him.
Is not race, Katya. Together. Together.
- What, you shower once a week? - Is that an invitation?
(Pamchenko) Douglas, bend knees more.
- Good. - Hey. Hey!
- (grunts) - Oh, shit.
Toe pick.
(Kate laughing)
(Pamchenko) Katya, lift arms, please.
Go on. Lift arms.
Douglas, please to pick her up.
- Yeah? - Yes. Pick up.
OK. Enough.
- We are finish. - I told you this was ridiculous.
Would you please put me down?
Ah!
Oh!
You... You cretin!
- Guess that move needs some work. - (groans)
(Doug) What a waste of good ice.
(Kate grunts)
Ridiculous.
(Jack) Stare at it long enough,
you'll start to see an Olympic gold medal in there.
Jack Moseley. Sit down. Sit down, please.
Look, I've spoken with Anton.
First of all, I want you to know the simple fact that he brought you out...
You should feel proud. We're talking about probably the greatestjudge
of skating talent in the world.
Central Soviet Army Sports Club, Moscow Ice Ballet, the works.
I saw you skate in Calgary.
You were a great, great hockey player.
So I don't want you to feel as though this were a complete waste of time.
It was worth a shot.
- What, the eye? - No, the eye's not a problem.
Is it your daughter?
Kate is Kate.
She's an only child, raised without a mother.
The strain of competition.
Sudden changes tend to bring out her... color.
Oh, is that what that was?
Frankly, the idea's just a little too bizarre for me.
I believe you're on a 10:30 flight, first class.
There's a check in there for your trouble.
This is what you call giving me a shot?
I don't have time to screw around. I can't afford to be wrong about you.
We were 45 seconds away from the gold medal.
Our boy dropped the ball. That goddamn glass box is empty for one reason:
We can't find a go-to guy.
Thirty-five male skaters.
These boys have been doing this for years and couldn't cut it.
Wagner, no stamina.
Myersohn, no rhythm.
Leone, Parnes, Hudler.
Not one single pressure player in the bunch.
Lucky shot.
Double or nothing.
You're on.
(laughter)
Katie, there you are.
Hi. I was just coming to say goodbye.
Hold that thought. Doug is staying with us for a while.
- Good talking to you, Jack. - Doug.
Catch your act tomorrow.
That's the end of the line, honey.
(Doug) If we're gonna work together, try being polite.
(Kate) You're not gonna be here long enough to make it worth the effort.
- Think I can't put up with your shit? - I don't think you can skate.
There's two things I do really well, sweetheart.
And skating's the other one.
God. You really are a Neanderthal.
I hate to tell you, but I'm from Minnesota.
That's south of Neanderthal.
What do you do for fun, polish your knife collection?
I'm sure there's nothing I do that you'd find exciting.
I don't open beer bottles with my toes.
I don't sit around and count what's left of my teeth.
Hey, I don't even enjoy a good tractor pull.
Limited existence, but I've gotten used to it.
Life of the party. Place must be crawling with guys.
As a matter of fact, I do have a boyfriend.
A rough gig. You keep him chained up in the basement?
Hale, at the moment, is working in my father's London office.
He's an MBA. Harvard.
You might've heard of it. They do have a hockey team.
- He must be a very smart guy. - (Pamchenko) First position.
Bet you look good from a few thousand miles away.
(Pamchenko) OK, Douglas.
Come. Shoulders back.
Good, good. Now, chest out. Yes.
Shoulders back. Head higher.
When we're through, can we teach it how to breathe with its mouth closed?
(Doug grunts)
(laughs) Don't quit your day job.
(Pamchenko) Man and woman together make flower.
Douglas, you are stem.
Katya, you are petal.
Together, we make flower.
- (♪ Nia Peeples "Street of Dreams") - Toe pick.
- (grunts) - Toe pick.
(high-pitched) Toe pick. (laughs)
Whoa!
Dorsey back to Gretzky, over to Esposito.
LaFontaine to Dorsey. Dorsey to Gretzky.
Gretzky to Dorsey. Dorsey shoots. He scores!
Yes!
If you're so bored, why don't you read?
You mean a book?
It is a traditionally accepted format, yes.
Is this the beginning of a conversation here?
I was just simply asking if you knew how to read.
Yes. Doug can read.
What was the last book you read?
You were in college.
Last thing I read was a letter canceling my scholarship
when I couldn't play anymore.
- OK. High school. - I was a hockey player.
The only thing I had to read was a scoreboard.
- And they graduated you? - They revered me. I was a god.
What a tragic commentary on our times.
State championships, my last game,
300 people carried me around their shoulders on the ice.
It took the state police two hours to break it up.
What were you planning on doing when your gladiating days were over?
You can bet your tights I never thought I'd be working a freak show like this.
I'm surprised you don't chuck it all and start your own think tank.
So where'd you matriculate from?
You were in college?
I had tutors.
Excellent tutors.
Would you please find someplace else to put your clubs?
Man, would I love to see you play hockey.
Any day.
(♪ Chris Isaak "Diddley Daddy")
You can do better than that. Come on.
(Kate) Hey.
- (laughs) Come on. - Oh!
(Doug) That's one.
Come on, take it. Take it.
Cut it out.
(Doug) That's two.
Stop it, you...
(Doug) Three.
(Doug) Four.
(groans)
You make me ill.
(Kate screaming)
(hospital PA announcement)
It's not like his nose was perfect.
He's the one who wanted to play.
He's like those morons who go around insisting you hit them in the stomach
as hard as you can.
I don't know why I'm explaining this to you. All I did was play his stupid game.
Next you'll be telling me how guilty I sound.
- Is not guilt. - Well, at least we agree on that.
- Is fear. - You've gotta be kidding me.
What do I have to be afraid of?
Because finally you have found yourself a partner.
(laughs)
Oh, my God. I thought you said it was just his nose.
- What? What's wrong? - (man) He's all yours.
- Toe pick. - (chuckles)
Oh!
- What's her problem? - I think she is nervous about rematch.
Hm...
(♪ Black Box "Ride On Time")
Kate.
Mm-hm?
(♪ Arrow "Groove Master")
You want my hands where?
You gotta be kidding.
- How am I doing? - Maybe in about five years
you'll get it up to half-speed.
Hey.
Hey, come on!
(Pamchenko) Douglas? Douglas, come back.
You have the mentality of a rock, you know that?
(♪ Malcolm McLaren "Lauretta")
(alarm beeping)
(♪ Arrow "Groove Master")
(muted dialogue)
Yes.
(Doug) Yes. Yes. Yes. Ah!
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!
(Doug) She's got everything.
A house, the rink.
I don't get it.
You know something? I don't even think she likes to skate.
You worked in factory. You were happy there?
Hey, I worked there because I had to.
Uh-huh.
(knocking on door)
Just a moment, please.
- (Doug) Kate. Oh, you're... - What the hell are you doing?
- Did I say come in? Get out! - No.
Get out. Get out this second.
I handle this stuff all the time. It's not that big a mystery.
- What's that? - Open it up.
Go on. I wrapped it myself.
I looked in all the stores. What do you get for the girl who has everything?
An old shirt.
An old shirt? Bobby Hull wore that sweater.
That's Bobby Hull's game sweater. That...
I've had that 15 years. Bobby Hull.
- Forget it. I'll take it... - No, no. I like it.
- I'll get something else. - No, I like it.
- You'll tear it! - Then let go!
Thank you.
So anyway, merry Christmas.
Well, wait a minute.
Merry Christmas.
(chuckles)
Great Expectations.
Well, it was either that or Curious George Plays Hockey.
I took a chance.
- Thanks. - You're welcome.
(♪ Rosemary Butler "Love Shack")
(♪ Rosemary Butler & John Townsend "It Ain't Over Till It's Over")
- Hale? - Kate.
I was looking at your stuff. Great pictures in here.
That's your mom, right? Boy, she was a knockout.
Yes, she was very pretty. She was a show skater.
There's one over here. You look too young to walk yet.
You got skates on.
What is this expression on your face? Is that a smile?
I never knew you had so many teeth.
We usually keep this door closed during a party.
Am I some guy off the street?
You probably didn't recognize me in my rig here. It's pretty sharp, huh?
$69.95.
Turn around.
- What are you doing? - Turn around.
(scoffs) Thank you.
- Done? - Yes.
That book you gave me, it's pretty good.
Really? Using it as a doorstop or a coaster?
Very funny. Here.
- No, I don't drink. - It's only champagne.
- I've never had a drink in my life. - You're kidding.
- You afraid you're gonna get fat? - I hardly expect you to understand.
- Kate. - Hale.
There you are.
- Doug Dorsey, Hale Forrest. - Well... finally.
The secret weapon.
In the flesh.
(Doug chuckles)
- I guess this calls for a toast. - Let's drink to the little people.
I understand you were at Minnesota State.
For a while.
I used to play a little hockey myself. For fun.
Let me know. We'll slap it around sometime.
(chuckles) Sure. And maybe you can stop by the office.
- Help me with currency arbitrage. - If you will excuse me,
naked male insecurity really leaves me cold.
(Doug) Must be tough to stay away.
(Hale) I understand you're giving Kate a rough time.
(Doug) You know Kate.
Yes, I do. And I don't like to see her upset.
If I was you, I'd invest in blindfolds.
(♪ John Townsend "Walking The Dog")
(crowd) Seven, six, five,
four, three, two, one.
Happy New Year!
(all cheering)
(♪ Rosemary Butler & Warren Wiebe "Auld Lang Syne")
Happy New Year!
(man) Happy New Year, sweetheart.
Happy New Year!
(music fades)
(knocking on door)
- Who is it? - It's me, Kate.
- Hi. - Hi.
I spoke to Anton. He said you were leaving for the weekend.
- What, that's a problem? - No, I think it's great.
You haven't been home since you got here.
They probably think we've got you under lock and key.
- Come on in. - I haven't been up here in a while.
Not since Brian. Brian had mirrors up all over.
Yeah, I took them down.
It's kind of a mess. I wasn't expecting any company.
What's this?
(Doug) That's me smelling the ice.
I told this guy once I loved how ice smelled.
It became this thing. Somebody got a camera.
- I never thought about it. - I'm not surprised.
What's that supposed to mean?
- (car horn honking) - (Hale) Kate.
I'll be right there. What did you mean by that?
I think you'd skate even better if you'd let yourself enjoy it a little.
Wait. What's this? I come up to say, "Have a nice weekend,"
and you're gonna give me pointers?
- You brought it up. - No, I didn't.
- Yes, you did. - No, I didn't.
- Yes, you did. - No...
I came to give you this.
- What's that? - It's our greatest hits.
It's a video for your family of us skating.
- Thanks. - My dad booked some extra rooms
in Chicago, and we'd love them to stay with us.
- My family? - Yes. To the Nationals.
- They're coming, aren't they? - I don't know.
Look at all you've done. They must be really excited.
(Hale) Honey, it's a 7:30 show.
- You better go. - Why wouldn't they come?
They'll come, they're coming. Hale's waiting.
How do you know if you haven't told them?
- I'm gonna tell them. - When?
- Now. This weekend. - You sure?
- Yeah, I'm sure. - Really?
Kate, believe me. I'm dying to tell them.
(horn honking)
(♪ Johnny Winter "Shame Shame Shame")
Dougie? Dougie!
What?
(man) Doug. Hey, you're a captain now.
Come on, come on.
Hey, would you let him up for air, dear. Come on.
I'll be a son of a bitch.
(laughing)
Man, it's good to see you.
Yeah, it's good to see you, too.
Hey! My brother Doug, home from the Merchant Marine.
(cheering)
Did you forget how to use the phone?
Come on. Move back, move back.
He's been cruising all over the world
and he can't even get to the bar. Come on.
Hey, Ensign Dorsey. No, no... Lieutenant, Captain Dorsey, huh?
- Cool it with the Merchant Marine. - What? Sh, sh!
- What? - I didn'tjoin the Merchant Marine.
- (man) Still got your sea legs? - Sh!
If you weren't with the Merchant Marine, where were you?
Let's go outside and talk about this.
- We're all family here. - (man) Tell us about it.
Come on. Tell me now.
(man) Come on, chief.
Well, actually, it's kind of interesting.
Tell him.
I've been doing a little....
Been doing a little figure skating.
- Damn. - (man) What'd he say?
You been doing what?
(man) Finger painting?
These people, they think we can go all the way.
All the way to where?
To the Nationals. Walter, the cham...
You just don't understand.
Was it me? Was it something I did?
I'm telling you, I'm good.
Come on, Doug, you're a hockey player. How good can you be?
Face it. If you're lucky, a year from now
you're gonna be in a Snoopy costume in the frigging Ice Capades.
You know me better than that. You think I'd spend 15 hours a day, every day,
to win some consolation prize?
- I'm talking an Olympic gold medal. - It's the girl.
You're mixed up with this broad. That's it, isn't it?
- It's a great opportunity. - It's figure skating.
And I like it!
It's a lot goddamn harder than playing hockey, I can tell you that.
And the stuff we're doing, it's gonna be different.
The costumes, the music. Everything is gonna be different.
You'll see.
Are they gonna make you shave your legs?
Screw this. I don't even know why...
(laughing)
Gotcha.
(man) Ah!
Good. This is looking good. Now.
- Oh, I like it. - It's not too low, is it?
(man) Well, we don't want him to hide his light under a basket, do we?
Now, where to put this? Here. Here.
I know.
(beads falling on ground)
Let's put it here.
- What do you think you're doing? - Just getting started.
(rock music plays)
(switches to classical music)
This is Mozart.
- It's not us. - The deal was that we had to listen.
Kate, this is tired.
Ten thousand other skaters will be cueing up the same boring crap.
This doesn't get it done. It's like the costumes.
- Let's be different. - (switches to rock music)
Let's kick a little ass.
If you wanna see some asses kicked,
why don't you throw on some jeans and skate to this.
(switches to classical, turns up volume)
If you wanna win, you play it straight.
This is boring.
(rock music, turns up volume)
- Unacceptable! - (classical music, turns up volume)
(rock music, turns up volume)
- (Kate) Would you stop? - Didn't work for you last time!
What?
- You heard me! - (classical music, turns up volume)
- You have some nerve! - Just listen to my music one second!
- (Kate) Stop turning it! - (loud rock music)
- (switching music) - Guys.
Hey!
(turns off music)
It's after midnight.
I have a 6:30 appointment.
We were just wrapping up.
Play him the Mozart. You'll be asleep in no time.
Katya, please try to understand. Douglas is not boy. He is man.
- Is young, vigorous man. - I don't care what you call him.
He has three months to qualify for the Nationals. He needs every minute.
Sure, sure. This I know. And he is back on Monday.
- And he will be working much better. - Really?
Katya, please, you know.
Solitude is... Too much is not good, eh?
It's Christmas, we skate. I have the flu, we skate.
I have a boyfriend in London that I never see.
I skate every day so that you can play Dr. Frankenstein with this guy.
I show up every morning for seven months
so that you can give him two days to go offwhoring in New York City?
Is not entirely correct.
He went to Boston.
(Doug) If I get her any higher,
they'll need a putty knife to scrape her off the ceiling. Am I right?
(laughter)
- Are we ready for Nationals or what? - (Pamchenko) We will be.
- (Kate) Celebrating? We haven't won. - To you, Doug.
(Kate) Who's ready to order? I think I'll start with some vichyssoise.
Five weeks to go. Everything's starting to click. We're gonna kick some tail.
- Am I right? - (Kate) "Tail"? Excuse me?
- (Pamchenko) Some beluga. - I'm eligible.
Doug Dorsey, licensed to thrill.
Slow down, champ. We've got a long way to go.
- Trying to rain on my parade? - Don't let her beat you down.
Hasn't happened by now, he's in the clear.
You're standing there doing nothing. Get our menu.
- Now is not the time. - (Doug) Any specials or what?
(Hale) Everyone's in such a great mood.
- I'll throw another log on the fire. - Hale, now is not the time.
(Hale) They'll find out sooner or later. The fact is
I've asked Kate to marry me, and she's accepted.
- (Pamchenko) Fantastic. - (Jack) Oh, Hale, congratulations.
- (Hale) Thank you. - (Jack) Congratulations.
- That's great. - (Pamchenko) Katya, I want my kiss.
- (Hale) Show them the ring, Kate. - That's just great.
(Jack) Now, there's a piece of ice.
Hale, I think I'm paying you altogether too much.
- (Pamchenko) What are you doing? - (Kate) We ready to order?
- Yeah. - (Jack) Sure.
(♪ Sally Dworsky "Turning Circles")
(Rick) Still dropping that shoulder.
I thought you'd retired.
I changed my mind.
You know what I think is the saddest thing about sports?
People who stay too long at the party.
- What are you doing here, Rick? - I'd like to see you go out a champion.
That's my plan.
If you wanted to skate so badly, why didn't you come to me?
- I know we've made some mistakes. - Mistakes?
You spent the last ten years tying me into knots.
You were always difficult.
You know what the first thing you said to me was?
I was nine years old, and you came into my building.
And I was skating.
And when I was finished, I turned around,
and, oh, my God, there was Rick Tuttle.
And you know what you said?
You said, "Boy, do we have our work cut out for us."
Still blaming Calgary on Brian?
You meant a lot to this sport, Kate. You still do.
But Nationals? I mean, now, after all this time?
I just hate to see you... humiliated.
- Humiliated? - (chuckles) Oh, come on. This guy.
A hockey player? Let's face it.
Trusting partners was never your strong suit.
This guy, this hockey player,
is the best skater I've been on the ice with.
He gonna make you cry, he's so good.
You know your way out.
I swear, you let me down, it'll take them a month
to count the blade marks up your back.
Do me a favor, take off the rock while we work.
It's cutting the hell out of my hand.
(announcer) The United States Figure Skating Association
welcomes you to the National Skating Championships in Chicago.
Congratulations, and the best of luck.
Douglas, free leg must be high. Katya, head low.
Yes, your body must be tight.
- (Doug) Like rush hour out here. - (Kate) Spindler and Nyman.
They cry on command.
Ah. The Weiderman twins. Don't get too close. You'll go into sugar shock.
- Hey, isn't that...? - (Kate) Brian Neuman.
- My old partner. - The ex-husband.
Who's the new wife?
(Kate) Pekurovsky. Lorie Pekurovsky.
Tell me how you really feel.
(Brian) Well, Kate.
- Surprise, surprise. - Hello, Brian.
No wonder you've been keeping him to yourself.
- (Kate) What's the matter? - Nothing.
Don't worry. You'll get used to it.
Yeah, right.
(elevator dings, door opens)
Going down?
You talked me into it.
(Lorie laughing)
- Hello. - Hey.
- (Doug) How you doing? - I'm well.
- See you around. - OK. Just get in?
- (Hale) Yes. - I thought you were napping.
I couldn't sleep. I wasn't tired.
God! He has the self control of a rabbit.
Kate, what are you looking for?
Nothing. My earring.
I spend four years working my way back to Nationals
and what happens? I'm skating to weird music
with a partner who can't even follow the simplest of instructions.
Maybe he's got a problem sleeping.
The only problem that he has is finding his zipper fast enough.
I thought they looked good together.
You think this is funny? We have to skate tonight.
- Now is the time to rest. - Like you, huh?
That's it. That is it.
Call the front desk and get a room of your own!
I knew this wouldn't work out. I can't even concentrate.
I can't even find my lucky earring!
Hello.
This hasn't got anything to do with skating.
- What does that mean? - You're falling for him.
- What? - Doug.
- (laughs) Yes. - You are. You're falling for him.
- That's crazy. - You think so?
- You're nuts. - Am I?
- You see how we act together. - Yes, I do.
We never get along. I mean, we're always fighting.
Foreplay.
- OK, we're all in. - You are not waiting for Hale?
He's not coming. He had to go up to Boston. Business problems.
Is OK with you?
If you wanna worry about something, worry about ramjet the rookie here.
Who?
Let's go.
(woman) So here we are at night number four of the US National Championships.
The country's 12 best couples are in the arena tonight.
(man) Only two of these couples
will go on to the Olympics in Albertville, France six weeks from now.
(woman) Tonight we're seeing two and a half minutes in the compulsory moves
before tomorrow night's long program.
(jazz plays)
(classical music plays)
(applause)
(laughs) You look nervous.
You look really nervous.
How nervous are you?
(applause)
(retching)
(Doug continues retching)
(whispers) I feel better.
What is wrong with you?
I always get tight before a game.
Put it this way. When I played hockey, I used to have two helmets.
One for the game, and one forjust before.
- This just coming up now? - Bad choice ofwords.
(applause)
Beautiful skating. Just beautiful.
I don't believe this.
I'm fine. No problem.
(Kate) Don't sweat it.
- Look at me. - (man) Miss Moseley, Mr. Dorsey,
- you're on. - Look at my eyes, look at my eyes.
That's good. OK. Now, smile.
Concentrate on my forehead.
OK. Now, look at me and smile.
There you go. There. Bigger.
OK. Now, breathe.
Breathe!
Just don't breathe on me, OK?
Look, it goes away.
The worst it was, I went out and scored six goals in the first two periods.
(announcer) Next to skate, Kate Moseley, Douglas Dorsey.
- (applause) - (man) Miss Moseley, Mr. Dorsey,
- please. - You're saying once we get out there
everything will be fine?
It usually only took me about ten minutes to relax.
Our program is two and a half minutes.
So eight minutes after we're done, I'll be fine.
(applause)
(man) So here they are, former US champion Kate Moseley
and ex-hockey star Doug Dorsey at their first Nationals.
And what a place to make your competitive debut.
(engine revving)
(♪ Yello "The Race")
(woman) Side by side double axels. Here they come.
(man) And they nailed them. They nailed them just beautifully.
What a night for US pairs skating. It's extraordinary.
Brian Neuman and Lorie Pekurovsky into first place.
Johnny and Jodie Weiderman skate safely into the number two spot.
And out of nowhere, Kate Moseley and Doug Dorsey grab the number three.
(woman) Two couples are all the United States
are allowed to send to the Olympic Games.
Tomorrow night's long program should be very exciting.
Man, this overnight thing is brutal. Why can't it be a double-header?
Short program, long program, same night. Boom.
- We're out of here. Know what I mean? - I know what you mean.
It's like, enough already. It's like... What's the word?
- You know what word I'm looking for? - I don't know. Expectation?
- No, no. When you, uh... - Anticipation?
- Excitement? - Foreplay.
- Foreplay? - Yeah, you know. Like foreplay.
Yeah, I know what it means.
Well, wouldn't you rather just get right to it?
- What? - Skating. Long program.
Chicago. Nationals.
Flowers?
Sleep. I'd rather sleep.
- (door shuts) - Sleep?
(woman) Brian Neuman and Lorie Pekurovsky.
Beautiful skating. This assures them a place on the Olympic team.
(man) The remaining spot will go to one of the two teams left to skate:
Moseley-Dorsey or the Weidermans.
(woman) Kate Moseley and Doug Dorsey.
What a performance. Look at that sit spin.
This crowd knows it's seeing history in the making.
We're in for a major upset tonight.
(applause)
(woman) Oh, yes. That was great skating.
(man) Clean, powerful, and the crowd just loved it.
- Fantastic. - Are those for me?
Hey. You were great.
- (announcer) 5.4, 5.4, 5.4... - (man) These are not great marks.
- I expected much higher. - (woman) Evidently, so did the crowd.
- (booing) - It's hard to explain,
sometimes scores reflect more than what's on the ice.
The judges have their favorites. And they don't include Moseley and Dorsey.
The Weidermans will join Neuman and Pekurovsky on the Olympic team.
(announce continues)
This is horseshit!
What crap are they trying to pull? We skated our asses off out there!
You call this a sport? Bullshit.
(cheering)
(polka plays)
(crowd groans)
(woman) Just terrible. She stepped into the spin, then, I'm not sure,
but it looked like she got caught in his lederhosen.
(man) You know what this means.
We are in.
Yeah! Yeah! We're going to France!
Parlez-vous Olympics?
(♪ The Dan Reed Network "Baby Now I")
- Sure you wanna do this? - Whatever you're having.
- All right. We're here. - (Kate laughing)
(Kate) Oh, boy.
- (Kate laughs) - OK.
Whoo! Whoa. (laughs)
You wanna dance?
- No, I don't think so. - Aw, Doug. (laughs)
Douglas, you silly thing.
Please don't think. (chuckles)
That's what I like about the way I feel. Even if I tried to think, I couldn't.
And I think too much, and I think so long. And it's so tiring.
The world is spinning and spinning and spinning.
(Doug) Look.
Did you ever play with magnets?
You used to have to push them around and they'd push away
and you push them around the table? All you really had to do
was just flip them over, and suddenly...
Don't you see? That's why everything's been so awful.
All we needed was a little flip.
Kate, it's not right. What about Hale?
(Kate) Oh, Hale-shmale. (laughs)
We're through.
Our engagement is off.
Flip. (laughs)
Come on. Not tonight. Not like this.
Not like what?
Not like me? (laughs)
- Kate, you're bombed. - What do you mean? (giggles)
That means that it's time for you to go to bed.
God, just what I need. Someone else telling me what to do.
In case you've missed it, I am throwing myself at you.
I am tearing off my clothes
and you are giving me a rundown on drinking dos and don'ts.
- Hey. Why don't you calm... - I get enough coaching on the ice.
- Get out. - You've got this all wrong.
Do I ever.
Excuse my surprise, but really, what a disappointment.
- What is that supposed to mean? - Well, look at you.
God's gift to reckless abandon
revealed as nothing but a prude in wolf's clothing.
You're a lousy drunk.
And you're a lousy date!
It didn't have to be like this.
I said get out.
(door opens, closes)
(♪ Delbert McClinton "I've Got Dreams To Remember")
(knocking on door)
Hi.
I watched your program.
You've got a great sit spin.
I thought maybe we could trade secrets.
(sighs)
It's a little early for practice, isn't it?
I'm sorry. I must have the wrong room.
(Doug) Ask her for more towels, will you?
Kate.
Kate!
Kate, will you wait a minute? Kate.
Kate. Kate!
- Kate. - Don't. Don't even try it.
Looking at you makes me sick.
To think I was coming to apologize. Lorie Pekurovsky.
Were you or were you not engaged until last night?
- Hardly the point. - You threw me out of your room.
Count your blessings, she may not have waited.
- That's not how it happened. - Spare me the details.
- Where the hell do you get off? - Me?
This is my fault? From the first day, you treated me like a hired hand.
Then one night you get drunk, I'm supposed to thank my lucky stars?
I'm sorry. I don't downshift that fast.
- Get out of my way. - No problem.
I've been practicing that move for a year and a half!
(chuckles)
Blind date.
So we have little problem, huh?
Good. We skip little problem,
and go straight line to big problem.
"And what is big problem, coach?"
Smilkov and Brushkin.
"Who?"
Smilkov and Brushkin.
Last night they win European Championship.
Perfect scores.
Everybody's been blown away. Contest is over.
Smilkov and Brushkin are unbeatable.
So, hello, Soviet surprise package.
Goodbye, gold medal.
Of course, there is a possible solution.
But... it's probably too dangerous.
Where did these come from?
For 20 years, I've been working on this.
But you know, to have skaters, to have situation,
to have desire, is not ready until now.
What is this? Is this a bounce spin into a throw?
(Pamchenko) Mm-hm.
- You can't do that. - The key to this is release.
- There can be no halfway. - No. No. It's illegal.
(laughs, speaks Russian) Is gray area.
Bounce spin to a throw twist. Then I catch her?
Well, sort of.
We can't do this.
Why not? We have all the pieces.
We have five weeks.
The Pamchenko Twist.
- Absolutely not. - You expect us to name it after you?
No, no. Is mistake.
- Is not right time. - This is good stuff. I can do this.
- What are you saying? I can't? - Hey, if the shoe fits.
Hey, listen. I have been competing for 13 years
and nobody tells me what I can or cannot do.
Don't quit your day job.
OK, again.
Again.
Again, again. Again. Again.
Katya, head up.
Higher. Higher. She has to fly.
- Are they gonna get it? - Eventually.
Before they kill each other?
Release. Release must be total. Is no halfway. Halfway is bullshit.
You go halfway, you get hurt.
Higher. Much higher.
We are needing an explosion.
(Kate) Oh! Oh!
Kate?
I was just looking at the pictures of Mother.
(Jack) I can hear her now:
"The Olympics."
It's what she always dreamed of.
Look at this thing. Just sitting here empty.
We're almost there, honey.
- I can taste it. - What if it stays empty?
Mm. Not this time. Go to bed. You need your rest.
I'm not tired.
- Kate. - No. What are we doing?
Why am I doing this?
It's what you've always wanted.
Always?
- Kate... - I know.
I'm going. These little pep talks can be so exhausting.
(classical music plays on TV)
(music plays backwards)
(woman) Opening ceremonies, you enjoyed yourself?
- (Brian) It was great. - Cold and great.
So, Doug, what's the difference between this and hockey?
- The women. - (laughter)
What's the feeling? Everybody out for themselves
or is there a team spirit building?
- Oh, we're definitely a team. - Definitely.
There's a real sense of togetherness.
- Spirit. - Spirit.
Family. It's sort of...
It's almost...
- It's almost... - Orgasmic.
(woman) What did she say?
- The Russians. - The Russians.
(man) Nikolai?
- (man) Nikolai? - (woman) Can we get a photo?
You guys gonna be here a while?
(classical music plays)
(applause)
You forgot a button.
No, I like it open.
Well, it looks terrible.
It pulls at my neck.
You should've mentioned that in Chicago.
(speaks Russian) Enough.
(announcer speaking French)
(speaking French)
Button it.
- We're on. - (speaks Russian) Good luck.
(woman) Representing the United States of America, Moseley and Dorsey.
- Button the goddamn button. - Get over it.
You are an immature asshole of the lowest order.
(♪ Yello "The Race")
If it was 40 below and that button meant the difference
between a long satisfying life and a horrible death from hypothermia,
I still wouldn't give you the satisfaction.
Skate.
(man) A technically superior program,
but did you feel there was something missing?
(woman) Absolutely. They delivered all the short program required moves,
but it seemed very cold.
(man) As if we were seeing two strangers, rather than a fluid pair.
Itjust didn't look like they were having fun out there.
(woman) Hey, Doug.
- Was the altitude a problem tonight? - No.
Long program. We've been hearing all week about your new surprise move.
- What's it called? - The Pamchenko.
- The Pamchenko. Is it named after...? - We're not doing it.
- What? - We've taken it out of the program.
- It's not ready. - Doug?
(Pamchenko) A button?
- What in hell are you thinking of? - Me?
Yes, you. What the hell is in your head?
- He's making like this is my fault. - You didn't deliver.
What, you want a pat on the back?
When did I become the designated asshole?
What happened? Ask the ice queen.
- That'll be enough of that. - Let me know when you're done, Jack,
you can tell me why I spent five weeks on a move she was never gonna do.
- You're out of line. - I needed the gold medal!
Forget it! We can win without the move.
- (Pamchenko) Impossible. - Where were you when this was going on?
(Pamchenko) Where was I? I was babysitting!
Loud and clear, folks: Losing gracefully does nothing for me!
- Think about that in the future! - That what you told Brian in Calgary?
You can kid all you want about what happened. I've seen the tapes.
Brian was getting it done. Ask him. He'll tell you.
All right, Douglas, is enough.
Today, it's about a button. You people are all excuses.
- You wanna point a finger... - You goddamn son of a bitch.
Gotta find that go-to guy.
You should've started with a go-to girl, Jack.
- That cuts it! - He's right.
What?
He's right. He is.
All of it.
We worked so hard for two years.
And I just went and threw it all away.
- Why did you stay with me? - Kate, don't.
Don't what? Tell the truth?
We can't buy back what happened today.
(Kate) We can't start over.
Do you think I look at myself, at what I've become,
and do you think I'm proud?
- What do you want? - I don't know.
I guess I would like to go back to the beginning
and have you say, win or lose, I could just be your daughter.
You came every day, and you skated.
This must've been like a nightmare for you.
I didn't know it was gonna end up like this.
I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry. For everything.
Please excuse me.
I'm going for a walk.
(maid speaks French)
Kate. What's this?
I'm going over with my father. Anton has the other car.
He'll take you when you're ready to go.
- No, I'm talking about the bags. - I was gonna catch the 6:30 flight.
Tonight? After we skate?
The house is paid up for two weeks, so feel free to stay as long as you like.
Kate, wait. What are you saying? If this is about yesterday...
I'm retiring.
What?
This afternoon is my final skate.
- Kate, come on... - You'll be fine.
You won't have any trouble finding another partner.
Of course, they won't have my wonderful slap shot. (laughs)
I gotta go get ready.
(instrumental music plays)
(orchestral music plays)
(woman) Beautiful extension. Very classy.
(man) Executed very nicely.
I hope they can keep it going to the finish.
(woman) Neuman and Pekurovsky looking well-positioned for a medal.
Still to skate are Smilkov-Brushkin and Kate Moseley and Doug Dorsey.
- (Russian music plays) - (audience clapping)
Do you know what I think would be wonderful?
If you would go out there today and skate for these people...
...the way I have seen you skate.
Enjoy each other.
(speaking Russian)
(applause)
(cheering)
(Kate) What's the matter?
- Nothing. - Are you all right?
Fine.
- (music ends) - (applause, cheering)
Kate, I'm sorry. My timing, I know it stinks, but...
I just keep thinking this thing with us... it's gonna go away.
I keep thinking if I can just keep moving and checking,
I'll get clear, but...
Do you understand what I'm telling you?
- I don't wanna fight anymore. - No. I mean, yeah, I don't wanna fight.
- Look, we have to skate. - This won't wait.
Kate, maybe I wasn't ready. Maybe...
Maybe you didn't give me much of a chance. Maybe...
I don't know. I just... I just...
(announcer) Nine-six. Nine-three.
(woman speaking French)
Kate, somewhere in the middle of all this, I fell in love with you.
- (woman speaking French) - You may take the ice.
I'm saying I love you. I'm saying it out loud.
(announcer speaking French)
(woman speaking French)
Don't say we're not right for each other. We may not be right for anybody.
- (woman) You have to go on. - Will you shut up a minute!
It can't be any harder to stay together than it was to stay apart.
- (woman) Thirty seconds. - (Doug) Will you wait a minute?!
Kate... I need you.
I need you.
We're doing the Pamchenko.
- What? - Oh, you heard me.
Think I'm doing this to get a program out of you?
You wanna win, don't you?
No. It's no good, Kate. It's too dangerous.
Then we agreed. We're putting it in.
- (woman speaking French) - (applause)
- It's out. - It's in.
- Out. - In.
- What difference does it make? - The difference is...
...I'm in the mood to kick a little ass.
(anthemic instrumental music plays)
(cheering)
(cheering, applause)
- You didn't have to. - Yes, I did.
Why?
Because I love you.
Just remember who said it first.
(cheering, applause)
(♪ Joe Cocker "Feels Like Forever Them From 'The Cutting Edge"')