1
00:00:54,283 --> 00:00:58,867
أنتي أخيل
والسلحفاة هزةُ الجماع.

2
00:00:59,033 --> 00:01:01,867
أوه،هيا.
- لا، لا، لا. إستمعْي.

3
00:01:02,033 --> 00:01:03,825
أخيل والسلحفاة
سَيَتسابقُان،

4
00:01:03,992 --> 00:01:06,075
وأخيل واثقُ من الربح،

5
00:01:06,242 --> 00:01:10,200
لذا سيَعطي السلحفاةَ
مائة متر كافضليه للبدايه.

6
00:01:10,367 --> 00:01:13,325
الآن المشكلة الحسابيه
تكمن هنا

7
00:01:13,492 --> 00:01:15,950
يُمْكِنُ أَنْ تعْبرَ السلحفاة
قبل أخيل

8
00:01:16,117 --> 00:01:17,325
يتوجب عليه أَنْ يَصلَ الى نقطةَ الوصول

9
00:01:17,492 --> 00:01:21,075
حيث السلحفاة بَدأتْ
بعد مائة متر.

10
00:01:21,242 --> 00:01:24,492
لكن عندما وصل اخيل إلى هناك،
إنتقلتْ السلحفاةُ،

11
00:01:24,658 --> 00:01:26,658
وبعد ذلك عليه
الوُصُول الى النقطةِ القادمةِ،

12
00:01:26,825 --> 00:01:28,283
والسلحفاة
إنتقلَت ثانيةً

13
00:01:28,450 --> 00:01:31,200
وهكذا وهكذا وهكذا.

14
00:01:31,367 --> 00:01:34,617
لذا أخيل لا يُمْكِنُه أبَداً الوُصُول
للسلحفاة ولا يمكنه ابدا عبورها.

15
00:01:34,783 --> 00:01:38,950
وبالطّريقة نفسها،
لأنك كُنْتَي تُطارديُ،

16
00:01:39,117 --> 00:01:41,992
أنتي لا تَستطيعُين أَنْ تَصلَي الى ارضاءَ.
ذلك التناقضُ.

17
00:01:42,158 --> 00:01:45,492
أَنا آسفُه، لَكنَّ يَبْدو كما لو أنَّ أنك
لا تْاخذُ هذا بجديّة كبيرة.

18
00:01:45,658 --> 00:01:48,575
انا أُخبرُك عن أسوأ
شيء حَدِثُ لي،

19
00:01:48,742 --> 00:01:53,950
بأنّني في تلك النقطةِ، خلال ثواني،
فَقدَت كُلّ الإحساس الجنسي.

20
00:01:54,117 --> 00:01:56,367
تَخدّرَ مهبلُي ببساطة.

21
00:01:56,533 --> 00:01:58,617
وفوراً و ببساطه
يَجِبُ أَنْ اسْمعَ عن

22
00:01:58,783 --> 00:02:01,242
هذا الهراء
حول المشكلة الحسابيه تلك.

23
00:02:01,408 --> 00:02:05,908
في الحقيقة، اني  اشَكِّ
انك كنت من الأصل تستمع.

24
00:02:06,075 --> 00:02:08,450
لماذا تَشْكُّين في ذلك؟

25
00:02:11,617 --> 00:02:14,867
هذه لَيستْ قصّة احببت ان اخبرها
من قبل لاي احد،

26
00:02:15,033 --> 00:02:19,492
لكن حينما أخبر رجالَ آخرينَ
حول خبرتي،

27
00:02:19,658 --> 00:02:22,700
وتجاربي في حياتي الجنسيةِ،

28
00:02:22,867 --> 00:02:25,992
كَانَ من الواضح للرُؤية
بأنّهم أصبحوا متحمّسينَ جداً.

29
00:02:26,158 --> 00:02:28,700
لقد تحمست .

30
00:02:28,867 --> 00:02:32,158
نعم، حول الحسابات الرياضيةِ،
ولَيسَ حول القصّةِ.

31
00:02:40,033 --> 00:02:43,867
أي نوع من الاشخاص
أنت، في الحقيقة؟

32
00:02:52,283 --> 00:02:54,367
أنتي لا تَعْرفَي.

33
00:03:00,492 --> 00:03:02,075
لا، لَكنِّي يُمْكِنُني أَنْ أَحْزرَ.

34
00:03:05,742 --> 00:03:08,576
لماذا أنا لَمْ أَحصَلْ عَلى ذلك في السابقِ؟

35
00:03:08,743 --> 00:03:13,784
في الحقيقة أنت غير  متحمّسِ
حول قصتي القذرةِ

36
00:03:13,951 --> 00:03:15,993
لأنك لا تَستطيعُ التواصل
معهم.

37
00:03:18,409 --> 00:03:20,951
لم يسَبَقَ لك أَنْ كُنْتَ مَع إمرأة.؟

38
00:03:32,576 --> 00:03:36,201
ذلك دقيقُ جداً.

39
00:03:36,368 --> 00:03:38,701
لَم اكن مَع اي رجل، ايضا.

40
00:03:47,159 --> 00:03:49,493
هَلْ أنت آسف على ذلك؟

41
00:03:54,118 --> 00:03:59,618
حَسناً، نعم، بدافع الفضول. . .

42
00:04:00,909 --> 00:04:04,243
لَيسَ خارج الرغبةِ،
كما أنتي تَعتقدينُ.

43
00:04:09,993 --> 00:04:14,951
أَعتبرُ نفسي لاجنسيَ.

44
00:04:15,118 --> 00:04:19,868
بالطبع، جرّبتُ
الإستمناء عندما كُنْتُ مراهقا،

45
00:04:20,034 --> 00:04:24,284
لَكنَّه لم يعني الكثير لي.

46
00:04:26,743 --> 00:04:30,451
لذا، ليس هناك اي شيء جنسي
عنيّ.

47
00:04:36,076 --> 00:04:38,868
هذا لَيسَ بشكل عام
كما أنت تَعتقدُين.

48
00:04:39,034 --> 00:04:43,743
وبالطبع، قَرأتُ الكثير
حول القصص الجنسيةِ. . .

49
00:04:43,909 --> 00:04:49,076
'Decameron'
'قصص كانتربري'،
'أَلْفُ لَيْلَةٍ وَلَيْلَةٍ'.

50
00:04:49,243 --> 00:04:53,076
انتي تطلقين عليه اسما وانا سوف اقراه
باهتمامِ عظيمِ

51
00:04:53,243 --> 00:04:55,618
ومتعة،

52
00:04:55,784 --> 00:04:58,493
لكن المتعةَ الأدبيةَ فقط.

53
00:05:00,451 --> 00:05:02,909
لكن. . . لكن أعتقد
لَرُبَّمَا يَجْعلُني

54
00:05:03,076 --> 00:05:05,743
مستمع أفضل
إلى قصّتِكَ، . . .

55
00:05:05,909 --> 00:05:12,618
لَيْسَ لِدي أفكارُ مُدركةُ
أَو تفضيلات.

56
00:05:12,784 --> 00:05:16,368
في الحقيقة انا أفضل حكم
يُمْكِنكُ أَنْ تخبريه قصّتَكَ .

57
00:05:16,534 --> 00:05:19,576
وعندما استمع الى ذلك  سوف أرى واحكم سواء
كنتي إنسان سيئ أَو جيد،

58
00:05:19,743 --> 00:05:22,951
. . . لَيْسَ لِدي مشكلُه مع ذلك.

59
00:05:23,118 --> 00:05:26,118
لأنني لا أَنْظرُ إليك
من خلال الأقداحِ

60
00:05:26,284 --> 00:05:30,451
لَوّنتْ بالجنسِ
أَو التجربة الجنسية.

61
00:05:32,576 --> 00:05:34,701
أَنا  لا زلت بتولا.

62
00:05:36,368 --> 00:05:38,493
أَنا بريءُ.

63
00:05:59,034 --> 00:06:01,326
انها تَنْظرُ  الي.

64
00:06:01,493 --> 00:06:04,368
نعم.

65
00:06:04,534 --> 00:06:08,326
هي أيقونةُ.
هل هي روسيه؟

66
00:06:08,493 --> 00:06:09,826
نعم، هي كذلك ,. . .

67
00:06:09,993 --> 00:06:15,034
هذه نسخة رائعه،
لَرُبَّمَا بطريقة عمل( Rublev.)

68
00:06:20,368 --> 00:06:23,826
الأيقونات لديها ارتباط
مع الكنيسةِ الشرقيةِ.

69
00:06:23,993 --> 00:06:25,201
الكنيسة الشرقية؟

70
00:06:26,409 --> 00:06:28,951
أنا قَدْ أُصبحُ نظري نوعاً ما.

71
00:06:30,493 --> 00:06:35,201
ربما بمقدورك. ان تخبرني
حول صورتِكَ.

72
00:06:35,368 --> 00:06:40,284
بالرغم من أن الكنيسةِ المسيحيةِ
إنفصلَت عن بعضها في سنه 1054

73
00:06:40,493 --> 00:06:41,826
بسبب الإختلافاتِ في الرأي

74
00:06:41,993 --> 00:06:44,743
بين الكنيسةِ الشرقيةِ
والكنيسة الغربية،

75
00:06:44,909 --> 00:06:51,118
التي نَدْعوها الكنيسةَ الأرثذوكسيةَ اليوم
والكنيسة الكاثوليكية الرومانية،

76
00:06:51,284 --> 00:06:54,909
هذه  أيقونة كنيسةِ شرقيةِ مثاليةِ.

77
00:06:55,076 --> 00:06:58,076
يُصوّرُ مريمَ العذراء

78
00:06:58,243 --> 00:07:00,243
والرضيع السيد المسيح
وذلك نادراً جدا،

79
00:07:00,409 --> 00:07:02,201
على سبيل المثال، الصلب،

80
00:07:02,368 --> 00:07:05,493
الذي في الكنيسةِ الغربيةِ
كَانَ سائدَ أكثر بكثيرَ.

81
00:07:05,659 --> 00:07:09,118
إذا كنت تعممين، يُمْكِنُك أَنْ تَقُوليينَ
ان الكنيسة الغربية

82
00:07:09,284 --> 00:07:10,868
كنيسةُ معاناة،

83
00:07:11,034 --> 00:07:14,701
والكنيسة الشرقية
كنيسةُ السعادةِ.

84
00:07:17,368 --> 00:07:20,118
لماذا تنظر مباشره الي؟

85
00:07:21,701 --> 00:07:23,368
حَسناً، انها تُخبرُ قصّة.

86
00:07:23,534 --> 00:07:25,159
الأيقونات كَانتْ أصلاً نوع مِنْ

87
00:07:25,326 --> 00:07:28,284
كُتب التوراة التصويرية للأُمّيينِ.

88
00:07:28,451 --> 00:07:30,493
هناك البعض الذين يَقُولونَ لك. . .

89
00:07:30,659 --> 00:07:34,201
قَرأتَ أيقونةً، لم تكن مكتوبه

90
00:07:36,243 --> 00:07:40,952
هناك أنواع مختلفة مِنْ الأيقوناتِ.
هذه   ( Hodegetria.)

91
00:07:41,119 --> 00:07:43,452
إنّ الإتّجاهاتَ مهمة جداً.

92
00:07:43,619 --> 00:07:47,869
هي تَنْظرُ إليك، لَكنَّها
إشارة الى الطفل الرضيعِ السيد المسيح.

93
00:07:48,035 --> 00:07:51,035
وهو يَنْظرُ إليك
ويُشيرُ اليها.

94
00:07:52,244 --> 00:07:57,369
هَلْ تَرى الى أي درجه سطحيه؟
ليس هناك. . . أي شيىء غير منظورَ.

95
00:07:59,285 --> 00:08:02,452
هذا  لأنها صورةُ الخلودِ.

96
00:08:03,535 --> 00:08:06,285
والخلود لَيسَ ثلاثي الابعاد.

97
00:08:07,327 --> 00:08:11,369
لَكنَّك قُلتَ الكنيسةَ الشرقيةَ
كَانتْ كنيسة البهجةِ؟

98
00:08:12,410 --> 00:08:14,994
نعم، القداسة
الكنيسةِ الشرقيةِ

99
00:08:15,160 --> 00:08:17,619
كَانتْ كلّ شيء عن بهجة الإيمانِ

100
00:08:17,785 --> 00:08:21,660
بينما الكنيسة الغربية تَمرّغتْ
في. . . في المعاناة والموتِ.

101
00:08:21,827 --> 00:08:26,202
إذا تَتخيّلُين عقلي
سافرْ مِنْ روما شرقاً،

102
00:08:26,369 --> 00:08:29,994
تَشْعرُين كَمْ ابتعدتي
عنْ الذنبِ والألمِ

103
00:08:30,160 --> 00:08:31,660
نحو البهجةِ والضوءِ.

104
00:08:31,827 --> 00:08:34,494
لَكنَّك تَقُولُ
أنت لَمْ تُؤمنْ بالله.

105
00:08:34,660 --> 00:08:39,910
لا، لكن مفهومَ الدينِ
مثيرُ.

106
00:08:40,077 --> 00:08:43,244
مثل مفهومِ الجنسِ.

107
00:08:43,410 --> 00:08:45,244
لَكنَّك لَا تريدين ان تَجدَينني
على رُكَبِي

108
00:08:45,410 --> 00:08:47,827
فيما يتعلق بلامر.

109
00:08:47,994 --> 00:08:52,035
دعينا نَدْعو هذا الفصلِ،

110
00:08:52,202 --> 00:08:55,077
' الكنيسة الشرقية
والكنيسة الغربية. '

111
00:08:55,244 --> 00:08:56,869
لَكنَّه لَنْ يَكُونَ. . .

112
00:08:57,035 --> 00:09:00,285
هي لَنْ تكُونَ قصّة حول السفر
الى الشرق من روما

113
00:09:00,452 --> 00:09:03,702
نحو الضوءِ،
لكن بالأحرى الى النظيرَ.

114
00:09:03,869 --> 00:09:07,285
لذا، بالترتيب
لن  اَجْعلَه حزينا جداً،

115
00:09:07,452 --> 00:09:10,785
سوف اضع  فوق
الفصل عناوينِ إضافيِه.

116
00:09:17,119 --> 00:09:19,077
ينبغي أنْ أعود إلى الوراء قليلاً.

117
00:09:19,244 --> 00:09:23,827
كُنْتُ بعمر 12 سنةً في رحله
مع  المدرسةِ على التلالِ.

118
00:12:02,910 --> 00:12:05,869
هَلْ تَسْخرُين مِني؟
- ماذا تَعْنين؟

119
00:12:06,035 --> 00:12:07,869
عِنْدَكَ هذه هزةِ الجماع،
لَيسَت فقط هزةَ جماع

120
00:12:08,035 --> 00:12:11,328
لكن هزة جماع تلقائية.
- نعم، هي كَانَت هزةَ جماع،

121
00:12:11,495 --> 00:12:15,536
و مع ذلك الطبيب وَصفَه
كنوبة صرع.

122
00:12:15,703 --> 00:12:18,995
وأثناء هزةِ الجماع هذه،
تولدت عِنْدَكَ هذه الرؤيةِ؟

123
00:12:19,161 --> 00:12:22,953
تلك الإمرأتين
على كُلّ جانب منك.

124
00:12:23,120 --> 00:12:26,536
الامراه على يميني كانت تكتسي بلباس ؟
127
00:12:26,703 --> 00:12:28,870
من الأرجوانِ والقرمزي

125
00:12:29,036 --> 00:12:32,036
مرصع في  الكثير مِنْ الذهبِ واللآلئِ.

126
00:12:33,078 --> 00:12:36,203
كَانتْ تَحْملُ قدح ذهبي
في يَدِّها.

127
00:12:36,370 --> 00:12:41,620
و كَانتْ تَجْلسُ
على حيوانِ غريبِ.

128
00:12:41,786 --> 00:12:46,495
وبعد ذلك الإمرأة الأخرى
لُبِاسَها كان الملابسِ الرومانيةِ،

129
00:12:46,661 --> 00:12:48,453
مع طفل رضيع على ذراعِها

130
00:12:48,620 --> 00:12:53,495
وشَعرها كَما الموج يتمايل
تحت حجابها.

131
00:12:57,078 --> 00:13:00,453
كَانَت تَحْملُ الحجابَ
بأصبعين هكذا؟

132
00:13:01,536 --> 00:13:02,786
والإمرأة الأخرى،

133
00:13:02,953 --> 00:13:07,578
كَانَت تَجْلسُ على حيوانِ
بسبعة رؤوسِ وعشَر قرونِ؟

134
00:13:07,745 --> 00:13:12,245
الحيوان كَانَ عِنْدَهُ رئسُ واحد فقط.
هو كَانَ يشبه الثور.

135
00:13:16,661 --> 00:13:19,161
ما المسألة؟

136
00:13:20,786 --> 00:13:22,286
أنتي تَتصنعين هذا.

137
00:13:22,453 --> 00:13:25,870
لا، لا اتصنع انما اخبرك
حول هزةِ جماعي الأولى،

138
00:13:26,036 --> 00:13:28,495
اللتي حدثت معي
بدون أي لمسه

139
00:13:28,661 --> 00:13:32,245
في بَعْض الطرقِ الغريبةِ
فوق احدى  الجبالِ.

140
00:13:32,411 --> 00:13:35,036
لم اتوصل من قبل الى
هزة جماع كهذه،

141
00:13:35,203 --> 00:13:36,286
بالرغم من أنَّي قد  إستمنيتُ من قبل

142
00:13:36,495 --> 00:13:39,411
كما لو أنَّ حياتي إعتمدتْ على هذا
خلال تلك الفترة.

143
00:13:43,703 --> 00:13:48,828
قصّتكَ هذه  مثل. . .
إعادة الرواية بطريقه كافرة

144
00:13:48,995 --> 00:13:52,995
كتبدلِ الهيئة
للسيد المسيح على الجبلِ،

145
00:13:53,161 --> 00:13:58,120
كواحده من الاعتقادات للكنيسةِ الشرقيةِ
حول الممرات االمقدسه.

146
00:13:58,286 --> 00:14:01,745
هي عندما إنسانيةُ السيد المسيح
تحولت الى نور

147
00:14:01,911 --> 00:14:04,286
وامتلات بالضوءِ القدسيِ للخلودِ.

148
00:14:04,453 --> 00:14:08,286
السيد المسيح، بطرس والتابعان
تسلقا الى الجبل.

149
00:14:08,453 --> 00:14:10,745
وفجأة،
يَرى التوابعُ هذا الضوءِ

150
00:14:10,911 --> 00:14:13,286
إنبِثاق مِنْ رئسِ السيد المسيح.

151
00:14:13,411 --> 00:14:16,161
وموسى وأليجه
قد ظهراْ بجانبِه.

152
00:14:16,328 --> 00:14:20,870
وهم يَسْمعونَ صوتَ الله،
يدَعوه إبنه.

153
00:14:21,036 --> 00:14:26,203
العلاقة بين. . .
بين الإمرأتين وبينك

154
00:14:26,370 --> 00:14:28,745
سَتكُونُ نفس
العلاقة

155
00:14:28,911 --> 00:14:33,411
بين موسى وأليجه
والسيد المسيح.

156
00:14:33,578 --> 00:14:36,203
وهكذا ستتحول الى قصه كافرَه.

157
00:14:37,828 --> 00:14:39,203
اني أَرى.

158
00:14:39,370 --> 00:14:40,786
أنت لا حتى. . .

159
00:14:40,953 --> 00:14:43,828
أنت لا تَعْرفُ حتى مَنْ
هؤلاء النِساءِو من كُنّ، أليس كذلك؟

160
00:14:46,828 --> 00:14:50,536
لا، لكن أحداهمَ
مثل مريمِ العذراء،

161
00:14:50,703 --> 00:14:51,995
الآن بدات تتخيل الامر.

162
00:14:52,161 --> 00:14:54,078
حَسناً، هي لم تكن مريمَ العذراء،
أنا يُمْكِنُني أَنْ أُخبرَك ذلك.

163
00:14:55,453 --> 00:14:56,703
مِنْ وصفِكَ،

164
00:14:56,870 --> 00:14:59,245
هي
فاليريا ماسيلينا،

165
00:14:59,411 --> 00:15:01,828
زوجة الإمبراطورِ كلوديوس،

166
00:15:01,995 --> 00:15:05,620
الشبق السيئ السمعة الأكثر
في التأريخِ.

167
00:15:08,286 --> 00:15:10,745
إعتقدتُ بأنّها
تشبه أيقونتِكَ.

168
00:15:10,911 --> 00:15:14,036
عِنْدَنا تلك الصورةِ
مِنْ تمثال في متحف اللوفرِ.

169
00:15:14,203 --> 00:15:19,453
هو كانه هودجيتريا، لَكنَّه
لَيسَ شخصا متدينا، انه بعيد كل البعد عنه.

170
00:15:20,661 --> 00:15:24,370
والإمرأة الأخرى،
اللتي تركب المخلوق ،

171
00:15:24,536 --> 00:15:27,453
انها لم تكن الا
العاهرةَ العظيمةَ لبابل،

172
00:15:27,620 --> 00:15:31,536
الركوب على النمرود
على شكل ثور.

173
00:15:35,620 --> 00:15:38,203
لو انأي شخص آخر
أخبرَني بهذهّ القصّةِ،

174
00:15:38,370 --> 00:15:41,370
كنت لاراها
نكتة كافرة،

175
00:15:41,536 --> 00:15:43,203
كثير التوابل فوقها مَع لمحه توراتيه

176
00:15:43,370 --> 00:15:47,828
إنبِثاق مِنْ لا شيءِ وأقل
مِنْ هزة جماع تلقائية.

177
00:15:49,995 --> 00:15:51,911
حسبي الله.

178
00:15:52,078 --> 00:15:54,786
هذا تَطْلبُ الكثير
منك للاستماع.

179
00:15:55,995 --> 00:15:59,453
أَعِدُ بأنّني أَني بريء
فيالإعتباراتِ الدينيه

180
00:15:59,620 --> 00:16:02,578
كما انت عندما يتعلق الأمر بلجنسَ.

181
00:16:04,453 --> 00:16:07,203
تبدله الهيئة
على جبلِ الزهرةَ.

182
00:16:09,953 --> 00:16:13,995
وبعد ذلك لاحقاً،
فَقدتَي هزةَ جماعكَ.

183
00:16:19,370 --> 00:16:21,661
Wagner. ' Das Rheingold '.

184
00:16:21,828 --> 00:16:26,328
الهبوط إلى نيبلهيم.
هَلْ كان ذلك يهذا السوء؟

185
00:16:26,495 --> 00:16:29,661
حاولْ أَنْ تَتخيّلَ ذلك
كله انتهى في سقوط واحد،

186
00:16:29,828 --> 00:16:32,036
فَقدتَ كُلّ الرغبة للقِراءة

187
00:16:32,203 --> 00:16:35,536
وكُلّ حبّكَ وعاطفتكَ
للكُتُبِ والرسائلِ.

188
00:16:35,703 --> 00:16:38,578
أنا لا أَعْرفُ حتى
إذا يُمْكِنُ أَنْ أَتخيّلَ ذلك.

189
00:17:00,871 --> 00:17:02,412
هَل أستَطِيِعُ مُسَاعَدَتُكُ؟

190
00:18:04,371 --> 00:18:06,579
لكن كلذا في أغلب الأحيان حدث
قبل ذلك في حياتِي،

191
00:18:06,746 --> 00:18:11,204
قليلاً مِنْ الأملِ َ
لعله حدث باطني.

192
00:18:11,371 --> 00:18:12,537
أَنها كانت؟

193
00:18:12,704 --> 00:18:17,287
كثلاث أوراقِ ميتةِ
باليه غريبة.

194
00:18:17,454 --> 00:18:21,537
لقد أعطوك أملَ؟
لأي غرض؟

195
00:18:21,704 --> 00:18:26,079
للاحتفاظ بحسي الجنسِي.
- كيف؟

196
00:18:28,537 --> 00:18:31,037
لإستعادته بِالقوة.

197
00:18:58,912 --> 00:19:01,537
بالرغم مِنْ جُهودِي المتعبه،

198
00:19:01,704 --> 00:19:04,912
مهبلي أخفقَ في الاستجابه كلياً.

199
00:19:06,246 --> 00:19:08,662
لكن في الحقيقةَ
المبادرة إنتقلتْ

200
00:19:08,829 --> 00:19:11,746
بَدات في تَشجيع جيروم كثيراً.

201
00:19:11,912 --> 00:19:13,787
يَجِبُ أَنْ أَعترفَ
لقد جائت علي اوقات

202
00:19:13,954 --> 00:19:16,746
عندما قَضينَا وقتاً ممتعاً سوية.

203
00:19:20,662 --> 00:19:22,871
سَوف أَعطيك خمسة باوندات.

204
00:19:23,162 --> 00:19:25,037
اجل.

205
00:19:25,537 --> 00:19:28,162
إذا أنت تُمْكِنُت أَنْ تَضعَي هذه. . .

206
00:19:28,329 --> 00:19:30,662
في داخل مهبلِكَ.

207
00:19:30,829 --> 00:19:34,329
خمسة باوندات؟
- حقّا.

208
00:19:47,996 --> 00:19:49,912
اللعنه.

209
00:20:32,537 --> 00:20:35,537
شكراً لك.
- اهلا و سهلا.

210
00:20:38,912 --> 00:20:42,579
هَلْ حصلتو عَلى أيّ ملاعق؟
- لا، نحن لَمْ.

211
00:21:39,330 --> 00:21:41,830
ماذا ذلك يُخبرُنا؟

212
00:21:41,997 --> 00:21:45,080
ذلك الحبِّ والجنسِ لَيْسَ لهُما شيء
ليَعمَلُان مَع بعضهم البعض، أَو. . .

213
00:21:45,247 --> 00:21:48,163
أَو بأنّهم بالتأكيد
يعملْ أحدهما ضدالآخر؟

214
00:21:48,330 --> 00:21:51,580
الشيء الأكثر تشوّهاً
كَانَ خلال هذه الفتره،

215
00:21:51,705 --> 00:21:55,955
حيث كُلّ إحساس جنسي
حُرِمَني , لفترة،

216
00:21:56,122 --> 00:21:59,913
يَجِبُ أَنْ أَعترفَ،احسست بلامان
والراحة.

217
00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:02,913
تنقلنا سويه
وهكذا،

218
00:22:03,080 --> 00:22:04,497
وقد أصبحتُ حاملاً،

219
00:22:04,663 --> 00:22:07,622
لأنني كُنْتُ مهملَه
حول حبوبِ منع الحمل.

220
00:22:07,788 --> 00:22:10,788
شعورياً أَو بشكل غير واعي،

221
00:22:10,955 --> 00:22:13,955
كَانَ من المهمَ لي
أَنْ اولد ولاده قيصريه.

222
00:22:14,122 --> 00:22:17,080
أَعْني، بأنّ مهبلَي
كَانَ ذاهِباً إلى عملِ داعرِ ثانيةً،

223
00:22:18,163 --> 00:22:20,955
لقد شَعرتُ
بانها ولادة عشوائية

224
00:22:21,122 --> 00:22:23,955
لا تجْعلَ الأشياءَ بشكل أفضل.

225
00:22:24,122 --> 00:22:26,330
لقد كُنْتُ أَتخيّلُ الأشياءَ،

226
00:22:26,497 --> 00:22:29,538
لكن كما سمعت هناك،
الضوضاء مِنْ الآلاتِ

227
00:22:29,705 --> 00:22:33,038
دَقَّ خارجا في حبل مثل
الواحد مِنْ القطيعِ الصَغيرِ.

228
00:22:34,997 --> 00:22:38,163
نعم. لم يكن خوفاً.

229
00:22:38,330 --> 00:22:41,872
لكنه نوع مِنْ إلاشمئزازِ.

230
00:22:55,997 --> 00:22:59,288
استطيع ان أقسمَ
بأنّني رايته يَضْحكُ.

231
00:22:59,455 --> 00:23:01,497
إبن ضاحك.

232
00:23:01,663 --> 00:23:03,247
الدكتور فوستوس'
توماس مان يَصِفُ

233
00:23:03,413 --> 00:23:05,913
ولادة إبنِ نوح،حام

234
00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:07,872
الذي كَانَ يَضْحكُ عندما ولدَ.

235
00:23:09,955 --> 00:23:11,538
الطالع الشيطاني الآخر.

236
00:23:15,413 --> 00:23:20,288
على سبيل المصادفة، الطفل البريء
سُمّى مارسيل بعد مارس،

237
00:23:20,455 --> 00:23:21,830
الله للحربِ للرومان.

238
00:23:21,997 --> 00:23:24,080
والأمومة؟

239
00:23:24,247 --> 00:23:28,455
أَفترضُ حبَّ ألاموميَ لَمْ
يَرتفعُ إلى مستوى توقّعاتِه تماماً.

240
00:23:28,622 --> 00:23:31,330
لا، أنا لم يكن عِنْدي
أيّ توقّعات.

241
00:23:31,497 --> 00:23:34,122
والحبّ ألامومي
لم يكن مشكلة.

242
00:23:35,205 --> 00:23:38,705
لقد كان فقط ذلك كُلّما
نَظرتُ في عيونِ الطفلَ،

243
00:23:39,455 --> 00:23:43,955
كَانَ عِنْدي هذا الشعور المقلقِ
من الإكتشافَ.

244
00:23:47,330 --> 00:23:50,622
انه من المحتمل
شيء غريب لقَولذلك حول طفل. . .

245
00:23:50,788 --> 00:23:54,038
بأنّ حبّي لم يكن يعود أالى.

246
00:23:54,205 --> 00:23:57,122
لَكنَّه كَانَ مفهومي.

247
00:23:59,330 --> 00:24:02,413
إذا تَمنّى جيروم إستراحة
مِنْ الذي كَانَ لَهُ

248
00:24:02,580 --> 00:24:06,372
عمل نشيط في الغالب الآن،
هو يُمْكِنُ أَنْ يَنْسيه.

249
00:24:06,538 --> 00:24:10,247
أخيل كَانَ يُطاردُ ثانيةً
السلحفاة.

250
00:24:13,622 --> 00:24:16,788
إملأْ كُلّ فتحاتي.
- أنا لا أَستطيعُ، جو.

251
00:24:21,497 --> 00:24:23,247
أَنا آسفُ.

252
00:24:25,913 --> 00:24:27,788
أُحاولُ.

253
00:24:33,747 --> 00:24:36,747
هَلّ بالإمكان أَنْ نَتكلّمُ قليلاً؟
- بالطبع.

254
00:24:41,955 --> 00:24:46,747
أَحبُّك. أَحبُّ طيشَكَ
ورغبتكَ. أَحبُّك، جو.

255
00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:50,788
في الوقت الحاضر،
أنا لا استطيع إرْضائك

256
00:24:50,955 --> 00:24:53,038
في الطريقهِ اللتي اودها.

257
00:24:54,330 --> 00:24:55,205
لا تنزعَجُ، جو.

258
00:24:55,372 --> 00:24:56,872
هذا لا يَعْني بأنّنا لَنْ نَستمرَّ
في حياتنا الجنسيةِ،

259
00:24:57,038 --> 00:24:59,372
هذا مهمُ جداً لي.

260
00:25:00,747 --> 00:25:02,872
مهم جداً لي.

261
00:25:04,663 --> 00:25:07,872
عندما تَشترين نمر، حقّا،

262
00:25:08,038 --> 00:25:09,997
يتوجب عليك أيضاً أَنْ تَغذّيه.

263
00:25:10,163 --> 00:25:14,830
عليك ان  ترضيه، صحّ؟

264
00:25:21,580 --> 00:25:23,830
القصّة الطويلة قصيرة.

265
00:25:24,455 --> 00:25:25,955
لديّ نمر بين يديّ

266
00:25:26,122 --> 00:25:28,663
تقصد أنّني أفوق إمكانياتك.
- لا.

267
00:25:28,830 --> 00:25:31,288
أنتِ فقط ما يجب أنْ تكوني عليه

268
00:25:31,455 --> 00:25:33,122
كنت أفكر أنْ تراعي حصولي على قليل

269
00:25:33,288 --> 00:25:36,330
من المساعدة بالتغذية، هذا كل ما أريده

270
00:25:39,705 --> 00:25:43,330
تعني أنّه ينبغي أنْ أمارس
.الجنس مع آخرين كذلك

271
00:25:49,498 --> 00:25:53,831
هذه وسيلة قاسية لأخذ الأمر
...هكذا يا جو، ولكن

272
00:25:53,998 --> 00:25:56,373
ولكن بالضبط -
.بالضبط –

273
00:26:08,373 --> 00:26:10,831
كنت لفترة طويلة أتحايل
...على فكرة أنّ مفهوم

274
00:26:10,998 --> 00:26:14,331
ارتداء الملابس المثيرة يمكن أنْ يُحسِّن

275
00:26:13,498 --> 00:26:14,623


276
00:26:15,956 --> 00:26:17,414
.تبدين رائعة

277
00:26:17,581 --> 00:26:20,706
وأصبحَت معلّمَه بيانو.

278
00:26:43,414 --> 00:26:46,456
.أأنتِ على ما يرام؟ ؟
- لا.

279
00:26:46,664 --> 00:26:49,498
ما المشكلة؟
حسناً, إنّني حمقاء مع السيارات.

280
00:26:49,664 --> 00:26:51,748
أنا لا أَعْرفُ حقاً ما العمل.
لاأعرف حقاً ما ينبغي فعله هلا ساعدتني ؟

281
00:26:53,789 --> 00:26:57,456
بالطبع هي لَنْ يَعْملَ.
قبَّعات شمعةِ القدح قد أُزيلتْ.

282
00:26:57,623 --> 00:27:01,581
نعم، أنا عَمِلتُ ذلك.
أكان ذلك خطأ؟ ؟

283
00:27:01,748 --> 00:27:03,789
لأول مرّة أتيحت لي فرصة الاستمتاع

284
00:27:03,956 --> 00:27:05,831
بامتلاك سيارة ذات 8 أسطوانات.

285
00:27:05,998 --> 00:27:07,748
المجموعات المحتملة

286
00:27:07,914 --> 00:27:10,789
للثمانية رؤوس
على ثماني شمعات إشعال

287
00:27:10,956 --> 00:27:13,706
40,320,

288
00:27:13,873 --> 00:27:16,581
إذا أَتذكّرُ
رياضياتي بشكل صحيح.

289
00:27:16,748 --> 00:27:20,248
وواحدة فقط منها هي التي
،ستجعل السيارة تشتغل ،

290
00:27:20,414 --> 00:27:22,623
.الأمر الذي يمنحني
كل الوقت الذي أريده

291
00:27:22,789 --> 00:27:25,664
بيتهوفن، أليس كذلك؟
كان بالتأكيد جيّد جداً, ،

292
00:27:25,831 --> 00:27:27,539
ولكن كما تعلمون
،لا يمكنه أنْ يكتب نغمة متعددة

293
00:27:27,706 --> 00:27:32,498
اتَعتقدُ ذلك؟
- جسنا، نعم، أعتقد ذلك.

294
00:27:47,498 --> 00:27:50,956
سيكون أكثر دقة
القول بأنّ بيتهوفن

295
00:27:51,123 --> 00:27:53,706
قام بتجديد النغمة المتعددة

296
00:27:55,039 --> 00:27:58,414
كانت تلك بمثابة بصيرة
ذلك بأنّ أصوليو ،

297
00:27:58,581 --> 00:28:01,748
.باخ القدماء، اتهموه بعدم إتقانها

298
00:28:23,956 --> 00:28:25,956
أكان يوماً جيّداً؟

299
00:28:33,914 --> 00:28:36,581
لم نتكلم كلمه واحده

300
00:28:36,748 --> 00:28:40,039
بيني و بين جيروم حول دروس البيانو

301
00:28:54,248 --> 00:28:56,164
المره الاوله الرسائل الغامضه

302
00:28:56,331 --> 00:28:57,373
معنونه باسمي قد وصلت

303
00:28:57,539 --> 00:29:00,164
لقد خفت ان تكون رسائل غراميه

304
00:29:00,331 --> 00:29:03,539
من شخص قد نسيته او اخاف ان القاه

305
00:29:03,706 --> 00:29:07,539
لكي لاتنجرح مشاعر جيروم عندما يراهم

306
00:29:14,373 --> 00:29:17,748
لكن كان جيوم يقدم لي كهديه عندما احصل على البريد

307
00:29:17,914 --> 00:29:21,081
لكن الظروف كانت دائما فارغه

308
00:29:21,248 --> 00:29:23,289
لقد فهمت ان الرسائل في الحقيقه

309
00:29:23,456 --> 00:29:27,456
كانت ترسل من جيروم بنفسه كانه يمتحنني

310
00:29:29,498 --> 00:29:31,331
قراري كان اخفائهم عنه

311
00:29:31,498 --> 00:29:34,123
كان تماما ما كان يخافه

312
00:29:34,289 --> 00:29:37,123
و هذا قد غزى في داخله غيرته المجنونه

313
00:29:37,289 --> 00:29:40,748
وتخيلاته
الأوقاتِ الغير معدودةِ

314
00:29:40,914 --> 00:29:44,456
اريدان اقع في حبه حقيقتا عندما
يكون معلم البيانو

315
00:30:13,206 --> 00:30:14,831
وان استطيع الوصول الي القلب

316
00:30:14,956 --> 00:30:16,915
لكنيستِكَ الغربيةِ المُعانيةِ،

317
00:30:17,082 --> 00:30:20,290
يَجِبُ أَنْ أَقْفزَ للأمام
ثلاث سَنَواتِ في القصّةِ

318
00:30:20,457 --> 00:30:23,582
واتحدث عن اجتماعي بمن كنت اتصل

319
00:30:23,749 --> 00:30:24,999
."الرجال الخطرين"

320
00:30:31,374 --> 00:30:34,457
كنت أبقى بمفردي كثيراً مع
،مارسيل خلال هذه الفترة

321
00:30:34,624 --> 00:30:37,499
حيث كان جيروم كثير
،الأسفار في معظم الأوقات

322
00:30:37,665 --> 00:30:40,415
وعندما يؤوب إلى المنزل في النهاية
يقضى معظم الوقت في

323
00:30:40,582 --> 00:30:43,082
اتهامي بإهمال مارسيل

324
00:30:43,249 --> 00:30:44,582
والذي في رأيي

325
00:30:44,749 --> 00:30:47,999
كان مُجرّد غطاء لغضبه من عشاقي

326
00:30:48,165 --> 00:30:52,582
،أي إشباعي الجنسي

327
00:30:52,790 --> 00:30:56,249
ناهيك عن العاده السريه

328
00:30:56,415 --> 00:30:59,707
كان أبعد من أي وقت مضى

329
00:31:17,999 --> 00:31:20,582
كان علي التغيير

330
00:31:20,749 --> 00:31:22,624
وبطريقة ما، كان مصدر الإلهام

331
00:31:22,790 --> 00:31:26,415
هناك تحت نافذتي تماماً
.طوال الوقت

332
00:31:26,582 --> 00:31:29,915
قررت المضي الى حيث لم اذهب من قبل

333
00:31:30,082 --> 00:31:31,999
أنْ أتخيل وضعاً جنسياً

334
00:31:32,165 --> 00:31:37,415
.يكون فيه التواصل اللفظي مستحيل

335
00:31:37,582 --> 00:31:40,415
كنت أشعر أنّ ذلك يثيرني
جنسياً بشكل كبير

336
00:31:40,582 --> 00:31:43,457
أنْ أتخيل وضعاً جنسياً

337
00:31:43,624 --> 00:31:48,165
يكون فيه التواصل اللفظي مستحيل

338
00:31:51,415 --> 00:31:52,499
.مرحباً -
.مرحباً -

339
00:31:52,665 --> 00:31:54,582
أنا توبياس المترجم

340
00:31:54,749 --> 00:31:57,207
مرحباً أنا جو، تفضل

341
00:31:57,374 --> 00:32:00,040
أفهم أنّك تتقن اللغات الأفريقية

342
00:32:00,207 --> 00:32:02,999
بلا، أمتلك الأساسيات

343
00:32:03,165 --> 00:32:05,124
من الذي يحتاج إلى مترجم ولماذا؟

344
00:32:05,290 --> 00:32:10,499
ذلك الرجل
الرجل ذو السترة الخضراء

345
00:32:10,665 --> 00:32:13,165
ما هي اللغه اللتي يتكلمها

346
00:32:13,332 --> 00:32:14,999
الله اعلم  لا ادري

347
00:32:15,165 --> 00:32:18,165
كل ما اعلمه ان هذا ليس انغليزي

348
00:32:36,457 --> 00:32:39,207
انه صعب قليلا

349
00:32:39,374 --> 00:32:43,457
لكن سوف ارى ان امكنني التواصل معه

350
00:32:43,624 --> 00:32:45,082
قد يكون لديه بعض المعرفه

351
00:32:45,249 --> 00:32:46,165
حسنا

352
00:32:48,457 --> 00:32:49,582
هل ستاتي

353
00:32:49,749 --> 00:32:52,374
لا سوف ابقى هنا بينما تتواصلون في الكلام

354
00:32:54,457 --> 00:32:57,790
أريدك أنْ تسأله ما إذا كان
.يريد ممارسة الجنس معي

355
00:32:57,957 --> 00:33:00,415
.حسناً

356
00:33:02,665 --> 00:33:04,874
أوافق؟

357
00:33:28,832 --> 00:33:32,207
من الصعب القول

358
00:33:33,082 --> 00:33:38,165
سجلت الزمان والمكان
ولكن

359
00:33:39,040 --> 00:33:41,124
بصراحة لا أرغب في تحمل مسؤولية

360
00:33:41,290 --> 00:33:44,457
الصياغة الدقيقة في هذه الحالة

361
00:33:44,624 --> 00:33:47,874
وهو ما أعتقد، آه

362
00:33:48,040 --> 00:33:51,249
قد ينتمي إلى منطقة رمادية

363
00:33:53,249 --> 00:33:55,665
في مهنتي عن طريق الخطأ
كان عنوان لفندق رخيص

364
00:34:04,249 --> 00:34:05,665
لماذا كانا اثنين؟

365
00:34:05,832 --> 00:34:07,665
كان ذلك ما قصدته بالضبط

366
00:34:07,832 --> 00:34:11,749
على ما يبدو أنّ (نون) قد
.أحضر معه شقيقه

367
00:36:48,166 --> 00:36:50,041
لماذا كان غاضبا

368
00:36:50,208 --> 00:36:52,833
بوضوح كان هناك مشكله شخصيه بينهما

369
00:36:53,000 --> 00:36:55,708
ولكن في وقت لاحق سمعت
،أنّ الأداء في وضعية الشطيرة

370
00:36:55,875 --> 00:36:59,083
تطلب حساسية كبيرة
حيث أنّ الرجلين يمكن أنْ يشعرا

371
00:36:59,250 --> 00:37:01,750
على ما
.يبدو ببعضهما البعض من خلال الأنسجة

372
00:37:01,916 --> 00:37:05,333
تصوّرت أنّ الشجار كان
قد بدأ بالفعل على الدرج

373
00:37:05,500 --> 00:37:08,541
وأنّ واحداً أو الطرف الآخر

374
00:37:08,708 --> 00:37:10,708
طالب بأحقّية الإيلاج في ثقب من ثقبيّ

375
00:37:10,833 --> 00:37:14,375
في صراع مصالح مع شقيقه الزنجي

376
00:37:14,541 --> 00:37:17,208
لا ينبغي أنْ تستخدمي هذه الكلمة

377
00:37:17,375 --> 00:37:20,208
هذا ليس ما تسمينه بالصحيح سياسياً

378
00:37:20,375 --> 00:37:21,416
"زنجي"

379
00:37:21,583 --> 00:37:24,375
حسناً، أعذرني, ولكن في محيطي

380
00:37:24,541 --> 00:37:27,250
كان ذلك دائماً علامة تكريم
.لتسمية الأشياء بمسمّياتها

381
00:37:28,500 --> 00:37:31,375
في كل مرّة تصبح كلمة محظورة

382
00:37:31,541 --> 00:37:34,083
تزيل حجراً من الأساس الديمقراطي

383
00:37:34,250 --> 00:37:38,958
ُيظهر المجتمع عجزه في مواجهة مشكلة
.مُحدّدة عن طريق إزالة كلمات من اللغة

384
00:37:39,125 --> 00:37:41,041
بازالت الكلمه من اللغه

385
00:37:41,208 --> 00:37:44,791
بازالت الكلمه من اللغه

386
00:37:44,958 --> 00:37:46,041
أعتقد أنّ المجتمع يدّعي أنّ

387
00:37:46,208 --> 00:37:49,875
الاستقامة سياسياً تعبير دقيق جداً

388
00:37:50,041 --> 00:37:52,833
المخاوف الديمقراطية للأقليات

389
00:37:53,000 --> 00:37:58,000
وأقول إنّ المجتمع جبان كما الناس فيه

390
00:37:58,166 --> 00:38:02,041
والذين في رأيي أغبياء جداً
.أيضاً تجاه الديمقراطية

391
00:38:04,083 --> 00:38:07,750
أفهم وجهة نظرِك، ولكنّي
.أختلف معكِ تماماً

392
00:38:07,916 --> 00:38:09,375
ليس لديّ أي شك في الصفات الإنسانية

393
00:38:10,791 --> 00:38:14,375
يمكن أنْ يُعبّر عن الصفات
:البشرية بكلمة واحدة

394
00:38:14,541 --> 00:38:15,625
النفاق

395
00:38:16,583 --> 00:38:20,375
نقوم بترفيع أولئك الذين يقولون
الصواب ولكنّهم يعنون الخطأ

396
00:38:20,541 --> 00:38:23,375
ونسخر من أولئك الذين يقولون
.الخطأ ولكنهم يعنون الصواب

397
00:38:25,333 --> 00:38:27,833
المجتمعات مرتكزه على الكره

398
00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:30,333
بالمناسبة, يمكنني أنْ أؤكد لك

399
00:38:44,750 --> 00:38:46,833
بالمناسبة, يمكنني أنْ أؤكد لك

400
00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:51,208
أنّ النساء اللاتي يدّعين أنّ الزنوج
.لا يثرنهن جنسياً يكذِبن

401
00:38:51,375 --> 00:38:54,041
إذن، هل اشبعونكِ جنسياً؟

402
00:38:54,208 --> 00:38:55,916
أولئك الزنوج

403
00:38:57,458 --> 00:39:02,333
،لا
لكنّهم يُظهرون لي أنّ هناك
عالماً أبعد بكثير من عالمي

404
00:39:02,500 --> 00:39:04,791
عليّ استكشافه

405
00:39:04,958 --> 00:39:08,000
وهناك
أو ربّما في الجهة الأخرى

406
00:39:08,166 --> 00:39:09,875
استرجع حياتي مرّة أخرى

407
00:39:56,084 --> 00:39:58,376
من أنتِ؟

408
00:40:00,459 --> 00:40:01,959
أعرف ما تفعله

409
00:40:02,876 --> 00:40:06,209
أود أنْ أكون واحدة من
.النساء اللاتي تعالجهن

410
00:40:09,917 --> 00:40:12,167
هذا ليس بذي بال.

411
00:40:18,042 --> 00:40:19,792
سيدتي

412
00:41:12,876 --> 00:41:16,417
أيّتها الأميرة
قلت خمسة أيّام على وجه التحديد

413
00:41:16,542 --> 00:41:19,792
ولم تنقضي الخمسة أيّام بعد

414
00:41:19,959 --> 00:41:25,834
لذا
يجب أنْ تغادري
آسف

415
00:41:35,959 --> 00:41:37,959
لا زلتي هنا؟

416
00:41:40,126 --> 00:41:42,209
نعم

417
00:41:43,126 --> 00:41:45,584
لا اعتقد ان هذا يناسبك

418
00:41:48,709 --> 00:41:53,084
علينا ان نجري اختبار بسيط

419
00:41:56,459 --> 00:41:58,251
قفي

420
00:42:06,501 --> 00:42:08,292
اجلسي من فضلك

421
00:42:16,084 --> 00:42:22,042
اريدك ان تجلسي باسترخاء شديد

422
00:42:22,209 --> 00:42:24,792
بينما اصفعك على وجهكي

423
00:42:24,959 --> 00:42:26,667
لا شيئ مميز

424
00:42:26,834 --> 00:42:31,167
انها
انها مجرد صفعة

425
00:42:36,626 --> 00:42:38,334
هل انتي جاهزة؟

426
00:42:39,834 --> 00:42:41,792
انا جاهزة

427
00:42:49,001 --> 00:42:50,792
لا؟

428
00:42:53,834 --> 00:42:55,376
هل رأيتي؟

429
00:43:06,126 --> 00:43:08,834
يا له من غموض

430
00:43:09,001 --> 00:43:11,876
أيمكنكِ أنْ تقدّمي لي الآن تفسيراً معقولاً الان

431
00:43:12,042 --> 00:43:14,292
أم يجب أنْ ننتظر؟

432
00:43:16,167 --> 00:43:17,959
لا أستطيع أنْ أقدّم لك تفسيراً

433
00:43:18,126 --> 00:43:21,209
وبالتأكيد ليس تفسيراً معقولاً

434
00:43:21,376 --> 00:43:25,751
ما هي بالضبط تلك الشائعات عنه؟

435
00:43:25,917 --> 00:43:30,417
إنّه كان عنيفاً
كيف يمكن أنْ يكون ذلك مثيراً؟

436
00:43:34,042 --> 00:43:36,334
أعتقد أنّ أسهل طريقة لفهم ذلك

437
00:43:36,501 --> 00:43:39,126
هو الرجوع إلى طبيعتي المتمردة

438
00:43:40,709 --> 00:43:45,792
هذا العمل الخاص (بكاف) كان
شيء أنا ضده تماماً.

439
00:43:45,959 --> 00:43:47,876
لذلك، فإنّ حقيقة أنّني أتصل به الآن

440
00:43:48,042 --> 00:43:50,835
كان محاولة يائسة أخيرة

441
00:43:51,002 --> 00:43:54,085
لإعادة تأهيل حياتي الجنسية

442
00:43:55,043 --> 00:43:58,418
كان النظام عامل تجاوز بالنسبة لـ (كاف)

443
00:43:59,293 --> 00:44:01,418
نظام العنف؟

444
00:44:02,210 --> 00:44:05,168
،حسناً
أنت الذي

445
00:44:05,335 --> 00:44:09,127
أصريت على الكنيسة الغربية، أليس كذلك؟

446
00:44:09,293 --> 00:44:11,668
وإنّني
يبدو لي أنّني أتذكر أنّ

447
00:44:11,835 --> 00:44:15,960
المقاربة المنهجية لصلب المسيح ذات
طبيعة عنيفة ولا أقول سادية

448
00:44:16,127 --> 00:44:19,710
طبيعة عنيفة ولا أقول سادية

449
00:44:19,877 --> 00:44:23,877
أوه نعم... إنّ آلام المسيح

450
00:44:24,043 --> 00:44:26,752
زاخرة بالعنف المنهجي
طريق الآلام، المحطات التسعة للصليب

451
00:44:26,918 --> 00:44:29,585
والـ 39 جلدة

452
00:44:53,710 --> 00:44:56,502
أنتِ تبدأين في تهييجي

453
00:45:26,793 --> 00:45:29,210
دعيني أخبرك بالقواعد إذن

454
00:45:31,168 --> 00:45:33,627
القاعدة الأولى هي أنّني لن أنيكِك

455
00:45:34,585 --> 00:45:37,835
و لا نقاش حول هذا البتّة

456
00:45:38,835 --> 00:45:41,085
إذن، ماذا تحصل من هذا؟

457
00:45:41,252 --> 00:45:46,085
هذا عملي
ولا أريد أنْ تذكري ذلك مرّة أخرى

458
00:45:46,252 --> 00:45:49,918
القاعدة الثانية هي أنّه
،ليس لدينا أي كلمة آمنة

459
00:45:51,085 --> 00:45:53,627
وهذا يعني أنّه إذا، آه
دخلتي معي، لا يوجد شيء

460
00:45:53,793 --> 00:45:56,543
لا يوجد شيء يمكن ان تقوليه

461
00:45:56,710 --> 00:46:01,752
من شأنْه أنْ يجعلني أتوقف
أي خطة أو إجراء

462
00:46:01,918 --> 00:46:06,918
يجب عليك إحضار جلد بُنّي اللون
ذلك الذي يستعمل لامتطاء الخيول

463
00:46:07,085 --> 00:46:12,168
وليس من متجر لبيع الاعاب الجنسيه

464
00:46:12,335 --> 00:46:13,960
إنّها ليست حفلة تنكرية جنسية

465
00:46:16,210 --> 00:46:18,627
القاعدة الثالثة

466
00:46:18,793 --> 00:46:24,710
اذا اخترت السماح لكِ بالدخول, عليكِ أنْ
تجلسي هنا

467
00:46:24,877 --> 00:46:29,418
وبعبارة أخرى
لن تعرفي متى

468
00:46:29,585 --> 00:46:35,127
لن تعرفي متى
الثانية والسادسة مساء

469
00:46:35,293 --> 00:46:37,210
لا أستطيع البقاء هنا حتى
.هذا الوقت المتأخر

470
00:46:37,377 --> 00:46:41,168
جليسة طفلي ليست موثوقة، وأنّني
لا أستطيع ترك طفلي

471
00:46:43,835 --> 00:46:45,460
إنّك لا تعرف حتى اسمي

472
00:46:45,627 --> 00:46:48,043
إنّني لا أهتم بالأسماء

473
00:46:49,502 --> 00:46:51,918
...هنا، اسمك

474
00:46:54,543 --> 00:46:56,335
فايدو

475
00:47:10,085 --> 00:47:11,627
هل لي ان اساعدك

476
00:47:11,793 --> 00:47:14,377
اريد ان اشتري سوط

477
00:47:14,543 --> 00:47:17,877
لماذا
لحصاني

478
00:47:18,043 --> 00:47:20,460
لقد فهمت هذا الجزء
اي نوع من الاحصنه

479
00:47:23,002 --> 00:47:25,877
حسنا انه ليس كبيرا

480
00:47:26,043 --> 00:47:28,502
لا فقط عنيت  سوط
للبس او القفز

481
00:47:28,668 --> 00:47:30,585
اه

482
00:47:30,793 --> 00:47:32,293
لا اعلم

483
00:47:33,418 --> 00:47:35,960
هذا النوع

484
00:47:36,127 --> 00:47:37,960
حسنا انه للقفز ايضا

485
00:47:38,127 --> 00:47:40,168
حسنا ,اعجبك هذا؟

486
00:47:44,252 --> 00:47:46,168
هل هو مستعمل
لا

487
00:47:47,127 --> 00:47:50,085
لدينا بعض السواط المستعمله
لكن بصراحه هذا ليس غلي الثمن

488
00:47:51,752 --> 00:47:53,585
انني افضل سوط مستعمل

489
00:47:55,960 --> 00:47:57,502
حسنا

490
00:48:04,668 --> 00:48:07,377
هل مارسيل مستيقظ؟

491
00:48:07,543 --> 00:48:09,918
أتريد أنْ تقول وداعاً لأمك؟

492
00:48:10,085 --> 00:48:12,460
مع السلامة

493
00:49:11,503 --> 00:49:12,961
فايدو

494
00:49:35,044 --> 00:49:37,003
سآخذ معطفك

495
00:49:57,419 --> 00:49:59,836
أريدك أنْ ترفعي شعرك

496
00:50:01,128 --> 00:50:03,836
يمكنك استخدام هذا

497
00:50:04,003 --> 00:50:07,794
فقط في حال كان من الضروري
.صفعك في الوجه

498
00:50:07,961 --> 00:50:10,461
أينبغي أنْ أخلع ملابسي؟

499
00:50:11,961 --> 00:50:15,253
سأخبرك بما يتوجب عليكِ القيام به
ومتى

500
00:50:17,128 --> 00:50:18,753
يمكنك الآن الإنحناء

501
00:50:29,128 --> 00:50:30,961
اعطيني يدك

502
00:50:38,336 --> 00:50:40,753
اريد ان ارى هذه العقدة كيف سيكون شكلها
على معصمك

503
00:50:57,586 --> 00:50:58,878
حسنا

504
00:51:05,794 --> 00:51:07,711
عليك الارتفاع قليلا

505
00:51:15,128 --> 00:51:17,878
الان عليكي الانحناء
كيف

506
00:51:20,128 --> 00:51:22,044
اقتربي من الكرسي

507
00:51:23,753 --> 00:51:25,461
الآن انحني عند مستوى الوركين

508
00:51:28,669 --> 00:51:31,586
أنظري إلى الأمام. أنظري إلى الأمام
مع إبقاء رأسك مرفوعاً،

509
00:51:31,753 --> 00:51:34,628
أرفعي رأسك
واصلي النظر إلى الأمام

510
00:51:41,336 --> 00:51:43,378
واصلي النظر إلى الأمام

511
00:51:47,919 --> 00:51:49,794
يمكنك الوقوف

512
00:51:51,378 --> 00:51:53,378
علينا استخدام الأريكة

513
00:51:55,919 --> 00:51:57,753
تعالي واجلسي

514
00:52:00,211 --> 00:52:04,128
هوّني عليك، هوني عليك

515
00:52:04,294 --> 00:52:06,003
انحني

516
00:52:08,586 --> 00:52:10,794
ضعي ذراعيك بشكل مستقيم

517
00:52:21,294 --> 00:52:23,586
هوّني عليك
هوّني عليك

518
00:53:05,129 --> 00:53:08,045
اجعلي يديكي ممدوده و ممتده

519
00:53:08,254 --> 00:53:10,462
وكفوفك اجعليها متلاصقه

520
00:53:18,504 --> 00:53:20,087
.هوّني عليك

521
00:53:57,087 --> 00:53:59,295
في المرّة القادمة, لا ترتدي سروالاً داخلياً

522
00:54:24,795 --> 00:54:28,004
مؤخرتك ليست مرتفعة بما فيه الكفاية

523
00:54:28,170 --> 00:54:29,337
لا أعتقد أنّه يمكننا فعل هذا اليوم

524
00:54:29,504 --> 00:54:31,129
ماذا؟

525
00:54:37,962 --> 00:54:40,045
أود أنْ أراكِ مرّة أخرى يوم الخميس

526
00:54:47,170 --> 00:54:49,504
ما المشكلة؟

527
00:54:49,670 --> 00:54:52,337
أعتقد أنّنا يجب أنْ نرى كيف
.ستسير الأمور يوم الخميس

528
00:55:05,254 --> 00:55:07,087
مرحباً، لا يمكنني الرد على
.الهاتف الان

529
00:55:07,254 --> 00:55:09,379
ُالرجاء ترك رسالة

530
00:55:09,587 --> 00:55:12,420
نعم، هذه أم مارسيل مرّة أخرى

531
00:55:12,545 --> 00:55:16,962
الساعة الآن الواحدة والنصف
لدينا اتفاق

532
00:55:17,129 --> 00:55:21,670
آمل أنْ تتلقِّي هذه الرسالة
.وتأتي بأسرع ما يمكن

533
00:55:23,254 --> 00:55:26,087
مارسيل نائم

534
00:55:26,254 --> 00:55:30,379
يجب أنْ أذهب الآن

535
00:56:26,170 --> 00:56:28,087
ارفعي نفسك اكثر

536
00:56:31,004 --> 00:56:32,879
اكثر قليلا

537
00:56:36,712 --> 00:56:38,254
افضل

538
00:56:58,337 --> 00:57:02,337
أوه، هذا أفضل بكثير
ذلك أفضل بكثير

539
00:57:08,754 --> 00:57:11,587
سأقوم الآن بضربك 12 مرّة

540
00:57:11,754 --> 00:57:13,920
لا يهمّني إلى أي حد ستصرخين

541
00:57:14,087 --> 00:57:16,254
لأنّ لا أحد يمكنه أنْ يسمعك هنا

542
00:57:23,670 --> 00:57:27,505
هذا، آه
هذه ليست الكيفية التي تسير بها الأمور

543
00:57:29,088 --> 00:57:31,838
معظم الناس لا يصرخون حتى أضربهم

544
00:58:33,630 --> 00:58:35,255
هذا كل ما في الأمر

545
00:58:39,380 --> 00:58:43,005
شكراً
-على الرحب

546
00:58:54,255 --> 00:58:56,338
مرحبا هل انت هنا

547
00:58:58,796 --> 00:59:02,255
ان الامر برمته غريب جدا

548
00:59:02,421 --> 00:59:06,171
نعم غريب
غريب جدا

549
00:59:06,880 --> 00:59:12,171
لانني كنت متهيجه اكثر المره الثانيه
ليس هناك اي جدل حول ذلك

550
00:59:12,338 --> 00:59:15,213
لا اعرف من اين نحصل على
هويتنا الجنسيه

551
00:59:15,380 --> 00:59:19,463
أو من أين يأتى ميول من هذا النوع

552
00:59:20,505 --> 00:59:23,588
ربما تحريف ينشأ في طفولتنا
.

553
00:59:23,755 --> 00:59:26,046
والذي لم يتجلّى من قبل

554
00:59:26,213 --> 00:59:30,630
حسناً, من الغريب أنّ فرويد يقول العكس

555
00:59:30,796 --> 00:59:34,338
إنّه يتحدث عن الانحراف الجنسي
،المتعدد الأشكال للطفل

556
00:59:34,505 --> 00:59:39,630
وهذا يعني أنّ الطفل لديه
جميع أنواع الانحرافات الموجودة

557
00:59:39,796 --> 00:59:42,963
ثم نستخدم الطفولة
.

558
00:59:43,130 --> 00:59:45,713
لنقلّل أو نزيل بعضها

559
00:59:45,880 --> 00:59:49,171
في الأساس، إنّ الطفل
،متعدد الأشكال جنسياً

560
00:59:49,338 --> 00:59:52,963
وكل شيء جنسي لدى الطفل الرضيع

561
00:59:53,130 --> 00:59:56,255
ورغم ذلك فإنّه من الغريب للغاية

562
00:59:56,421 --> 01:00:00,296
أنْ يكذب هناك
خصوصاً أنّه يريد أنْ يكذب هناك.

563
01:00:04,546 --> 01:00:07,546
شعرت بلقهر

564
01:00:07,713 --> 01:00:10,380
على الاغلب شعرت كاني نبته متروكه في وعاء

565
01:00:12,005 --> 01:00:13,588
نبته؟

566
01:00:13,755 --> 01:00:17,796
نعم لانه كان باستمرار يفحص
مهبلي ان بداء بلابتلال

567
01:00:17,963 --> 01:00:22,921
بلطريقه نفسها التي تفحص بها
العجائز نبتاتها ان كانت رطبه
او بحاجه للسقي

568
01:00:25,796 --> 01:00:29,796
إنّها نقطة مثيرة للإهتمام
أنّك كنتِ مُزيّتة فعلاً
(يقصد أنّ فرجها أصبح رطباً ذاتياً)

569
01:00:29,963 --> 01:00:34,046
وأنتِ تتوقعين الألم
والذي لم تجرّبيه من قبل.

570
01:00:36,005 --> 01:00:38,921
جسمك أصبح مستعد
للإتصال الجنسي

571
01:00:39,088 --> 01:00:41,505
والذي كنتِ تعلمين أنّه لن يحدث

572
01:00:43,380 --> 01:00:47,088
أستطيع أنْ أصف المزاج
.بأنّه كان مزاجاً جنسياً

573
01:00:49,088 --> 01:00:51,630
وبلرغم من عدم جهوزيتي

574
01:00:51,796 --> 01:00:55,963
كانت اساليبه المتكرره مدهشه

575
01:00:56,130 --> 01:01:00,630
حيث كنت أتلوى واستدير
بينما كان يجلدني

576
01:01:00,796 --> 01:01:04,546
كان يمكنني أنْ أشعر كيف
.كانت العقدة مربوطة بشكل زكي

577
01:01:04,713 --> 01:01:08,380
إذا قاومتها ستصبح أكثر إحكاماً

578
01:01:08,546 --> 01:01:12,463
وكلّما استرخيت
يبدو أنّها تفعل ذلك أيضاً

579
01:01:12,713 --> 01:01:15,213
ممممم

580
01:01:15,505 --> 01:01:19,130
كقطه تلعب مع الفار

581
01:01:20,588 --> 01:01:22,880
تكنون مجنونه ان فكرت بان
هناك طريقه للهروب

582
01:01:23,046 --> 01:01:26,463
و من ثم تهاجمها مرة اخرى

583
01:01:28,505 --> 01:01:34,088
لا أعرف أي نوع من العُقد
التي استخدمها (كاف)

584
01:01:34,255 --> 01:01:39,505
ولكنّي أعرف عُقدة
تصبح محكمة عندما تمارس
عليها القوة بإجهاد

585
01:01:39,671 --> 01:01:42,421
والعكس بالعكس
. تُسمّى عُقدة بروزيك

586
01:01:42,588 --> 01:01:45,463
سُمّيت كذلك على رجل يدعى

587
01:01:45,630 --> 01:01:47,463
بروزيك كان متسلق جبال

588
01:01:47,630 --> 01:01:49,296
كان هو وصديقه يتسلقان

589
01:01:49,463 --> 01:01:53,796
وتوفي صديقه

590
01:01:53,963 --> 01:01:57,214
وانتهى به الأمر أنْ تعلّق في نهاية حبل

591
01:01:57,381 --> 01:02:00,881
مع عدم وجود إمكانية للصعود

592
01:02:01,047 --> 01:02:03,672
أتعلمين, لا يمكنك أنْ تتسلّقي
.جبلاً بحبل تسلّق،

593
01:02:03,839 --> 01:02:05,631
إنّه رقيق للغاية

594
01:02:05,797 --> 01:02:09,172
لكنه كان رجلاً ذكياً
وفيما ظهره متجه نحو الحائط، كان

595
01:02:09,339 --> 01:02:11,172
عبقرياً

596
01:02:12,922 --> 01:02:16,131
أخذ الرباطان من حذائه

597
01:02:16,297 --> 01:02:20,422
وصنع حلقتان
وربطهما بالحبل

598
01:02:20,589 --> 01:02:22,922
وأمكنه تحريكهما إلى أعلى

599
01:02:23,089 --> 01:02:24,339
عندما لا يكونا مشدودين

600
01:02:24,506 --> 01:02:26,797
وأمكنه أنْ يخطو عليهما

601
01:02:26,964 --> 01:02:31,047
وهكذا تسلّق الحبل وأنقذ نفسه

602
01:02:31,214 --> 01:02:33,339
.بروزيك

603
01:02:35,964 --> 01:02:39,672
أعتقد أنّ هذا هو أحد أضعف
.أوجه خروجك عن الموضوع

604
01:02:43,672 --> 01:02:48,214
أتسمح لي أنْ أواصل؟
تفضّلي

605
01:02:52,881 --> 01:02:56,964
غدا اجلب 15 قطعه نقديه متتطابقه الحجم

606
01:02:59,006 --> 01:03:00,964
لا اكثر و لا اقل

607
01:05:01,797 --> 01:05:05,131
احيانا اعطي هديه في الكريسمس

608
01:05:05,881 --> 01:05:09,547
ولكن، آه
عليكِ القيام بالعمل بنفسك

609
01:05:09,714 --> 01:05:12,422
سوف اريك كيف تصنعيها

610
01:05:27,339 --> 01:05:29,339
هذه تُسمّى عُقدة الدم

611
01:05:29,506 --> 01:05:33,839
يجب أنْ تصنعي تسعة حبال
تحتوي على ثلاثة عُقد دم في كل منها

612
01:05:34,006 --> 01:05:35,839
أريني كيف تصنعينها

613
01:05:36,006 --> 01:05:40,714
عليكِ أنْ تقرّري ما إذا
،كان يمكنك صنع أربعة
خمسة أو ستة لفّات

614
01:05:40,881 --> 01:05:42,881
على مختلف العُقد

615
01:05:54,089 --> 01:05:55,797
دعني ارى

616
01:06:03,089 --> 01:06:05,214
هذا جيد

617
01:06:05,381 --> 01:06:08,506
لو انك.,, تبدا في عقده واحدة

618
01:06:08,672 --> 01:06:11,422
في اعلى الحبل

619
01:06:11,589 --> 01:06:16,339
و بعدها عليك بوضع عقدتين اخرتين على نفس المسافه

620
01:06:16,506 --> 01:06:20,672
حسنا بين 10 و 20 سم بلتحديد

621
01:06:20,839 --> 01:06:22,422
لكن المهم جدا في عقده الدم

622
01:06:22,589 --> 01:06:25,672
واجده من التسع عقد تكون مختلفه

623
01:06:25,839 --> 01:06:28,214
اللتي تترنح عليها

624
01:06:34,132 --> 01:06:36,965
تسمى بل قطة ذات 9 ذيول

625
01:06:37,132 --> 01:06:40,007
ابنه القبطان على متن السفينة

626
01:06:43,882 --> 01:06:46,132
ربطه الدم مهمه

627
01:06:46,298 --> 01:06:49,048
لانها اللتي سوف تكسر الجلد او لا

628
01:06:49,673 --> 01:06:55,423
ان كانت نهايه الحبل معقودة بشكل خاطئ

629
01:06:55,590 --> 01:07:01,423
وهناك عقدة حبل المشنقة هي أيضا نوع 
عقدة الدم مع العديد من المنعطفات.

630
01:07:01,590 --> 01:07:06,090
المعيار العسكري الأميركي
يتطلب من  خمسة إلى 15 عقده من المنعطفات،

631
01:07:06,257 --> 01:07:09,298
كما ان المنعطفات وضعت وراء
الأذن اليسرى مثل الجانحين

632
01:07:09,465 --> 01:07:12,673
التي من شأنها أن تكسر الرقبة
اذا سقط الجسد

633
01:07:16,215 --> 01:07:18,007
سوف اكمل من هنا

634
01:10:08,548 --> 01:10:10,215
جو؟

635
01:10:12,090 --> 01:10:13,632
يحب؟

636
01:10:23,673 --> 01:10:25,048
مارسيل؟

637
01:10:28,923 --> 01:10:30,382
مارسيل

638
01:11:10,174 --> 01:11:13,216
ما زلتِ مُولعة بي؟
نعم

639
01:11:13,383 --> 01:11:16,341
أكثر ولعاً بي من الآخرين؟

640
01:11:18,299 --> 01:11:21,174
نعم؟
نعم

641
01:11:21,341 --> 01:11:25,049
لا تفكرين بالمغادرة مرّة أخرى
هذه الليلة، أليس كذلك؟

642
01:11:25,216 --> 01:11:26,424
لا، لا؟ -
لا, لا -

643
01:11:26,591 --> 01:11:29,049
ا على الإطلاق -
هل أنتِ متأكدة؟ -

644
01:11:30,633 --> 01:11:31,758
أجل

645
01:11:31,924 --> 01:11:34,674
أتكذبين عليّ يا جو؟

646
01:11:34,841 --> 01:11:36,716
.لا -
.كوني صادقة -

647
01:11:36,883 --> 01:11:41,383
لا بأس
قولي الكلمة اللعينة فحسب

648
01:11:41,549 --> 01:11:43,883
.لا, إنّني أريد أنْ أكون هنا فحسب -

649
01:11:44,049 --> 01:11:45,883
لماذا؟ -

650
01:11:49,674 --> 01:11:51,549
لا أعرف

651
01:11:57,799 --> 01:12:00,883
إذا غادرتي الليلة

652
01:12:01,049 --> 01:12:04,591
لن تريني أنا أو مارسيل في حياتك أبداً

653
01:12:08,258 --> 01:12:10,299
أفهمتِ؟

654
01:13:26,133 --> 01:13:27,924
أهذا وداع لي؟

655
01:13:31,174 --> 01:13:34,174
أهذا ما تقولينه؟

656
01:13:34,341 --> 01:13:35,633
مارسيل، انهض

657
01:13:35,799 --> 01:13:37,924
.توقف -
أهذا ما تريدينه؟ -

658
01:13:39,466 --> 01:13:43,091
نعم، إذن تستطيعين رؤيته
أنظري إليه يا جو

659
01:13:48,591 --> 01:13:51,591
دعينا نواجه الأمر يا جو
, أنتِ لست بأم

660
01:13:53,591 --> 01:13:55,174
دعينا نوقظه

661
01:13:55,341 --> 01:13:59,716
مارسيل، طفلي الحبيب
قُل وداعاً لأمك

662
01:14:00,883 --> 01:14:03,508
أرجوك, ضِعه -
أهذا ما تريدينه؟ -

663
01:14:07,299 --> 01:14:09,008
أترين؟

664
01:14:09,174 --> 01:14:12,216
أترين، إنّه يريدك

665
01:14:12,383 --> 01:14:14,216
تعال

666
01:14:15,174 --> 01:14:18,258
إنّه عيد الميلاد. 
إنّه عيد الميلاد اللعين

667
01:14:41,133 --> 01:14:42,383
ما هذا؟

668
01:14:44,424 --> 01:14:47,674
اليوم السيدة هي التي يجب أنْ تنتظر

669
01:14:55,924 --> 01:14:57,883
سيدتي، أنا آسف جداً

670
01:14:58,049 --> 01:15:01,008
يجب أنْ أتحدث أولاً مع فايدو

671
01:15:11,799 --> 01:15:14,424
سلوككي اغضبني كثيرا اليوم

672
01:15:25,174 --> 01:15:28,008
إنّني حقاً يجب أنْ أرسلك إلى المنزل

673
01:15:49,925 --> 01:15:51,967
عيد ميلاد سعيد يا فايدو

674
01:16:54,259 --> 01:16:56,884
أريد قضيبك
ماذا قلتي؟

675
01:16:58,384 --> 01:16:59,925
أريد قضيبك

676
01:17:00,092 --> 01:17:03,675
لا لن تحصلي عليه, لن تحصلي عليه

677
01:17:07,009 --> 01:17:09,175
ما خطبك اليوم؟

678
01:17:30,884 --> 01:17:36,425
على حساب أيّام الأعياد
وسلوكك اليوم

679
01:17:36,592 --> 01:17:38,884
سأقدّم لك الحد الأقصى الأصلي

680
01:17:39,050 --> 01:17:42,050
من الأربعين جلدة الرومانية
هل أنتِ مستعدة يا فايدو؟

681
01:17:44,259 --> 01:17:45,800
أنا مستعدة

682
01:17:51,134 --> 01:17:52,884
واحد

683
01:17:55,175 --> 01:17:56,175
اثنان

684
01:17:58,467 --> 01:17:59,509
ثلاثة

685
01:18:02,009 --> 01:18:03,425
اربعة

686
01:18:04,717 --> 01:18:05,925
خمسه

687
01:18:08,217 --> 01:18:09,634
سته

688
01:18:22,967 --> 01:18:25,342
قد كنت أرى من خلال تقنية عُقدة (كي)

689
01:18:25,509 --> 01:18:28,009
وهكذا كنت قادرة على إرخاء
.وضعيتي قليلاً

690
01:18:28,175 --> 01:18:30,842
لأحرّك حوضي

691
01:18:31,009 --> 01:18:33,717
وبالتالي أثير بظري
على غلاف الكتاب

692
01:18:59,092 --> 01:19:00,550
اربعون

693
01:19:11,259 --> 01:19:16,259
وعندما جئت إلى المنزل
وجدتِ أنّ جيروم والطفل قد رحلا؟

694
01:19:23,092 --> 01:19:26,134
لم أر مارسيل منذ ذلك الحين

695
01:19:29,675 --> 01:19:34,259
هذه النَّزْعَةُ إِلَى التَّأَثُّرِ
...بالعَاطِفَةِ دونَ العَقْل
اكلرهها

696
01:19:37,509 --> 01:19:40,925
لماذا؟
لأنّها كذبة

697
01:19:45,217 --> 01:19:47,050
هل أنتِ متأكدة؟

698
01:19:54,050 --> 01:19:56,050
أدرك جيروم إنّه لا يمكنه
تحديد أولويات حياته

699
01:19:56,217 --> 01:20:00,925
ولا وفقاً لطفل

700
01:20:01,092 --> 01:20:04,051
لذا فقد وضعه في حضانة منزل

701
01:20:06,968 --> 01:20:09,760
اتصالي الوحيد بالصبي هو ألف
.جنيه

702
01:20:09,968 --> 01:20:12,885
أودعها في حسابه كل شهر

703
01:20:13,051 --> 01:20:14,510
بشكل مجهول

704
01:20:17,676 --> 01:20:19,885
باعتباره تكفيراً عن الذنب

705
01:20:29,801 --> 01:20:31,010
بعد كل هذا الحزن

706
01:20:31,176 --> 01:20:35,135
عندي هذا الشعور عندما اعود سوف تكون قد ذهبت

707
01:20:39,051 --> 01:20:40,926
هوكل ما يمكنني سماع
هو رفرفه القط،

708
01:20:41,093 --> 01:20:44,551
يتأرجح جيئة وذهابا

709
01:20:47,301 --> 01:20:50,718
شكرا. لم أكن أعرف انه
كان لديك رفرفه القط.

710
01:20:51,551 --> 01:20:52,760
لقد كانت لدينا القط،

711
01:20:52,926 --> 01:20:56,260
لذلك ليس لدي رفرف القط
في باب الدرج.

712
01:20:56,426 --> 01:20:58,218
ولكن كيف لها ان تخرج الى الخارج؟

713
01:21:01,260 --> 01:21:05,551
لم افكر ابدا في ذلك.
أفترض من خلال الطابق السفلي.

714
01:21:05,718 --> 01:21:07,426
الشيء هو ...

715
01:21:07,593 --> 01:21:10,426
في كل مره يفتح احدهم الباب الى الخارج

716
01:21:10,593 --> 01:21:13,676
كان القط يرفرف

717
01:21:13,843 --> 01:21:15,676
هناك الكثير من المجلدات
في المنزل.

718
01:21:17,218 --> 01:21:19,968
لم اكتشفها بعد

719
01:21:20,968 --> 01:21:24,301
لا، ليس هناك الكثير من الناس
 ياتون ذهابا و ايابا

720
01:21:24,468 --> 01:21:26,426
هذا غريب قليلا

721
01:21:26,593 --> 01:21:29,801
لا, لقد اعجبني

722
01:21:29,968 --> 01:21:33,843
انه انه مسالم

723
01:21:38,510 --> 01:21:43,843
بعد كل هذا الحزن، هل لي أنْ أسأل
ما الذي حدث للبطة الصامتة؟

724
01:21:44,885 --> 01:21:48,801
أوه, اللعنة
البطة الصامتة

725
01:21:48,968 --> 01:21:51,718
لقد نسيت كل شيء عنها

726
01:21:52,676 --> 01:21:55,426
ذات ليلة كان (كاف) في مزاج جيّد
.بشكل غير عادي بالنسبة له

727
01:21:55,593 --> 01:21:57,510
مزاجه كان جيد بشكل غير عادي.

728
01:21:57,676 --> 01:22:00,176
لا أعرف ما الذي سبّب له
،ذلك, لكنه لم يضرب بشدة

729
01:22:00,343 --> 01:22:02,468
وقال مازحاً أنّه سوف يعرّفني

730
01:22:02,635 --> 01:22:05,468
على مفهوم
لبطة الصامتة

731
01:22:30,718 --> 01:22:34,676
من الصعب على المرء
أنْ يجرؤ على تخيل
."البطة البطباطة"

732
01:22:47,968 --> 01:22:50,885
حسنا، في أعماقي،

733
01:22:51,051 --> 01:22:54,176
يبدو أنّ (كاف) كان في أعماقه
رجل فكِه ومرح

734
01:22:54,385 --> 01:22:55,551
وذو مواهب متنوعة

735
01:22:55,718 --> 01:22:59,510
ولكنّه حصل على قليل
من العقاب الروماني

736
01:22:59,676 --> 01:23:02,093
وأربعون جلدة خاطئة

737
01:23:02,260 --> 01:23:03,885
لأنّه صحيح أنّ أعلى
.عقوبة

738
01:23:04,051 --> 01:23:09,051
كانت أربعون جلدة
ولكنّها يجب أنْ تُقدم
.في سلسلة من ثلاثة

739
01:23:09,218 --> 01:23:11,093
هذا هو السبب في أنّ يسوع
.حصل على 39 جلدة فقط

740
01:23:11,260 --> 01:23:16,885
لأنّ ثلاثة تفضي إلى 39 وليس
أربعون

741
01:23:19,760 --> 01:23:22,968
حسنا لا اعرف ان كاف ان كان جيد ام لا

742
01:23:23,135 --> 01:23:25,593
صاحب منصب السادية

743
01:23:25,760 --> 01:23:28,885
لم يكن بوضع يحسد عليه كما ظهر اولا

744
01:23:29,051 --> 01:23:34,093
بشكل سطحي، وسادي
يقوم بدور صاحب القرار.

745
01:23:34,926 --> 01:23:37,843
لكن لمره يحصل على محادثة مع عاهرة

746
01:23:37,968 --> 01:23:40,468
اللتي قامت بكل التجارب في اختصاصها

747
01:23:40,635 --> 01:23:42,260
لم تكن تتفاجئ في اي شيء

748
01:23:42,426 --> 01:23:47,301
كما اعترفت بان ليها فقط المنحرفون جنسيا

749
01:23:48,218 --> 01:23:49,343
المنحرفون لها

750
01:23:49,510 --> 01:23:52,468
المتطلبون و الغير مكتفون

751
01:23:53,426 --> 01:23:55,843
كانت اولا تستدل على رغباتهم

752
01:23:56,010 --> 01:23:57,718
من خلال قرائة تفكيرهم

753
01:23:57,885 --> 01:24:01,843
ثم ينفذون من اي تغيير في القاعده

754
01:24:02,010 --> 01:24:05,176
and after which,
unlike other clients

755
01:24:05,343 --> 01:24:08,676
and the most honorable sadists,
for example,

756
01:24:08,843 --> 01:24:10,760
you never received any thanks,

757
01:24:11,676 --> 01:24:14,468
let alone gifts or flowers.

758
01:24:19,051 --> 01:24:21,885
I never went
in that direction again,

759
01:24:22,051 --> 01:24:24,510
neither back to K or masochism.

760
01:24:34,801 --> 01:24:37,511
But I took the orgasm with me.

761
01:24:38,927 --> 01:24:43,469
You yet have to show me one
single example of maliciousness.

762
01:24:44,261 --> 01:24:46,677
But that's all I'm doing!

763
01:24:46,844 --> 01:24:49,636
It's as if you want
to misunderstand me.

764
01:24:49,802 --> 01:24:53,427
You keep inventing
complicated and false excuses

765
01:24:53,594 --> 01:24:56,052
for my despicable
and selfish actions.

766
01:24:58,302 --> 01:25:00,052
During the time
when our relationship

767
01:25:00,219 --> 01:25:03,052
was going downhill,
Jerome really tried his best.

768
01:25:06,261 --> 01:25:07,844
I bought you something.

769
01:25:08,011 --> 01:25:09,761
You bought me something?
- I'm sure you'll love it.

770
01:25:11,386 --> 01:25:14,219
Wow, it's a ring.
- Yeah.

771
01:25:15,261 --> 01:25:16,302
It's beautiful.

772
01:25:16,469 --> 01:25:19,594
It was impossible
for me to work out Jerome's income.

773
01:25:19,761 --> 01:25:23,636
Sometimes he had lots of money
and other times none,

774
01:25:23,802 --> 01:25:25,052
which I later thought perhaps

775
01:25:25,219 --> 01:25:28,511
meant that his work
was not entirely above board.

776
01:25:28,677 --> 01:25:31,761
But this time
he'd really gone all out.

777
01:25:31,927 --> 01:25:36,469
That must've been so expensive.
- Well, it wasn't cheap.

778
01:25:36,636 --> 01:25:38,719
Best craftsmanship.
- Hmm.

779
01:25:38,886 --> 01:25:41,052
I'll guarantee you that.

780
01:25:41,219 --> 01:25:43,677
Let's play a game, then.

781
01:25:43,844 --> 01:25:46,094
A game?
- Mm-hmm. Get up.

782
01:25:46,261 --> 01:25:47,344
Okay.

783
01:25:47,511 --> 01:25:49,719
It's called 'Cinderella'.
- I don't know it.

784
01:25:49,886 --> 01:25:51,761
You will.
- Okay.

785
01:25:51,927 --> 01:25:53,802
Right.
- No, you don't touch it.

786
01:25:53,969 --> 01:25:55,511
Okay.
- You just look at it.

787
01:25:57,969 --> 01:25:59,761
Okay? Are you ready?

788
01:26:01,302 --> 01:26:02,927
Yes.
- Steady.

789
01:26:03,094 --> 01:26:05,386
Steady.

790
01:26:05,552 --> 01:26:07,302
Go.
- Fuck! Joe!

791
01:26:07,469 --> 01:26:08,677
Come on, Cinderella.

792
01:26:08,844 --> 01:26:11,302
Oh, fuck.
- Come on, come on.

793
01:26:11,469 --> 01:26:14,761
Joe! For fuck's sake.

794
01:26:14,927 --> 01:26:17,094
Move!
- Cinderella, Cinderella!

795
01:26:17,261 --> 01:26:20,344
Fuck! Are you mad, Joe?

796
01:26:21,219 --> 01:26:24,011
Are you fucking mad?
Fuck!Fuck.

797
01:26:24,177 --> 01:26:27,136
£7,000, Joe!

798
01:26:28,886 --> 01:26:30,302
Did he find it?

799
01:26:30,469 --> 01:26:35,344
Oh yes, and returned it
and got all his money back.

800
01:26:35,511 --> 01:26:40,094
So can you call this game
anything other than malicious?

801
01:26:44,969 --> 01:26:47,636
Let me chew on that for a while.

802
01:26:51,594 --> 01:26:54,677
So it wasn't the diamond that
you're wearing around your neck?

803
01:26:54,844 --> 01:26:58,136
No. But that was a gift, too.

804
01:26:58,302 --> 01:27:00,219
But I have to be honest and say

805
01:27:00,386 --> 01:27:03,177
I can't remember the person
who gave it to me.

806
01:27:04,136 --> 01:27:07,094
I've always been in...
in the theoretical way, of course,

807
01:27:07,261 --> 01:27:09,261
interested in diamonds
and their cuts.

808
01:27:09,427 --> 01:27:12,302
The word 'brilliant'
refers to the cut.

809
01:27:12,469 --> 01:27:15,219
Diamond is the stone.

810
01:27:17,094 --> 01:27:19,177
If we use the word 'divine'
in connection

811
01:27:19,344 --> 01:27:21,427
with the Golden Section
and Fibonacci,

812
01:27:21,594 --> 01:27:23,719
the brilliant cut is nothing less.

813
01:27:24,469 --> 01:27:27,636
It's a frighteningly refined cut.

814
01:27:27,802 --> 01:27:30,386
Fifty-seven facets.

815
01:27:30,552 --> 01:27:33,719
The theory is that the light
enters through the top plane,

816
01:27:33,886 --> 01:27:38,136
which is called the table
or in some languages the mirror,

817
01:27:38,302 --> 01:27:42,427
and then inside the diamond
is refracted in all the facets

818
01:27:42,594 --> 01:27:44,427
and thrown out the same way,

819
01:27:44,594 --> 01:27:49,594
creating a absolutely unique
light effect.

820
01:27:51,636 --> 01:27:55,427
So, it's called a mirror.
I didn't know that.

821
01:27:56,636 --> 01:27:58,427
You have a mirror, too.

822
01:28:00,886 --> 01:28:02,594
Yeah.

823
01:28:02,761 --> 01:28:05,177
It's like a thought, isn't it?

824
01:28:34,802 --> 01:28:36,052
Some years later,

825
01:28:36,219 --> 01:28:39,427
the bodily abuse
began to have an effect.

826
01:28:39,677 --> 01:28:42,927
First, rare bleedings
from my clitoris,

827
01:28:43,094 --> 01:28:46,469
but then they became
more and more frequent.

828
01:28:56,177 --> 01:28:57,761
Come in.

829
01:29:01,386 --> 01:29:05,094
But I really need my salary.

830
01:29:05,261 --> 01:29:06,845
I know.

831
01:29:08,220 --> 01:29:10,720
And I'd like to help you.

832
01:29:11,595 --> 01:29:14,845
Have you heard any
of the rumors about yourself?

833
01:29:18,428 --> 01:29:21,095
They say you see men
every evening

834
01:29:24,220 --> 01:29:26,970
and spend all night with them.

835
01:29:27,137 --> 01:29:30,387
They say you can't be trusted,
all of them.

836
01:29:32,803 --> 01:29:35,012
Why do they say that?

837
01:29:36,928 --> 01:29:39,553
I suppose they're afraid
that I...

838
01:29:39,720 --> 01:29:43,220
I can't keep away
from their men.

839
01:29:45,345 --> 01:29:48,220
Right. And can you?

840
01:29:49,428 --> 01:29:50,803
No.

841
01:29:53,928 --> 01:29:56,428
I've spoken with a psychologist.

842
01:29:57,762 --> 01:29:59,637
He says you're addicted,

843
01:29:59,803 --> 01:30:02,387
but that it's not the kind of
addiction that can't be treated.

844
01:30:03,095 --> 01:30:06,095
They have some groups.

845
01:30:06,262 --> 01:30:08,762
I know about these kinds
of groups.

846
01:30:08,928 --> 01:30:11,970
I don't have anything
to say to a psychologist.

847
01:30:12,137 --> 01:30:15,137
I'm not suggesting therapy.
I'm demanding it.

848
01:30:16,595 --> 01:30:18,720
Even if you leave us,
it'll be the same at your next job

849
01:30:18,887 --> 01:30:21,345
and the one after that.

850
01:30:26,303 --> 01:30:28,762
Why didn't you want to speak
with a psychologist?

851
01:30:30,303 --> 01:30:33,553
It's an old story.
I just don't like them.

852
01:30:36,887 --> 01:30:38,762
Well, if you insist
that I try to understand,

853
01:30:38,928 --> 01:30:41,053
then you have
to tell me that story as well.

854
01:30:41,220 --> 01:30:43,512
The old story.

855
01:30:44,678 --> 01:30:47,595
Okay. Okay.

856
01:30:47,762 --> 01:30:50,178
It's not that old after all.

857
01:30:50,928 --> 01:30:55,428
It was about a year after
I'd lost Marcel and Jerome.

858
01:31:02,553 --> 01:31:03,928
Okay.

859
01:31:05,262 --> 01:31:08,012
I'd been careless
with my birth control pills before,

860
01:31:08,178 --> 01:31:10,720
and now I just didn't use them.

861
01:31:10,928 --> 01:31:12,887
Didn't the
whole experience with Marcel

862
01:31:13,053 --> 01:31:15,970
convince you that there was no
room for children in your life?

863
01:31:16,178 --> 01:31:17,803
That's right.

864
01:31:22,553 --> 01:31:24,762
I know it sounds
incomprehensible,

865
01:31:24,928 --> 01:31:27,428
but actually, it was because
of my crippling fear

866
01:31:27,595 --> 01:31:30,720
of becoming pregnant
that I didn't take the pills.

867
01:31:30,887 --> 01:31:32,928
It's probably impossible
to understand.

868
01:31:33,095 --> 01:31:36,678
No, it makes sense to me.

869
01:31:36,845 --> 01:31:38,970
You were so afraid
of getting pregnant

870
01:31:39,137 --> 01:31:42,553
that you repressed
the possibility of it.

871
01:31:42,720 --> 01:31:45,970
You couldn't even handle
seeing the box of pills.

872
01:31:51,553 --> 01:31:53,012
Okay.

873
01:31:58,428 --> 01:32:00,303
Would you turn it down?

874
01:32:02,970 --> 01:32:05,595
If you look at the screen
you can see your child,

875
01:32:05,762 --> 01:32:07,512
but I can't tell you
the gender yet.

876
01:32:07,678 --> 01:32:10,262
I don't give a shit
about the gender.

877
01:32:10,428 --> 01:32:11,845
I want it removed.

878
01:32:14,887 --> 01:32:18,303
Okay. Uh, you're in week eleven.

879
01:32:18,470 --> 01:32:23,012
So legally, there are
no barriers for an abortion.

880
01:32:23,178 --> 01:32:26,053
Yes, I know that.
Just remove it.

881
01:32:26,220 --> 01:32:30,553
Well, we have some procedures
to follow.

882
01:32:30,720 --> 01:32:32,345
There's nothing more
to talk about.

883
01:32:32,512 --> 01:32:34,553
I can have it removed.
I want it removed.

884
01:32:34,720 --> 01:32:37,720
It is a very big decision,
best not made in haste.

885
01:32:37,887 --> 01:32:40,637
Didn't you understand
what I just said?

886
01:32:40,803 --> 01:32:43,178
Okay, there's
an informative consultation

887
01:32:43,345 --> 01:32:46,720
with our psychologist before
you can have the procedure.

888
01:32:55,678 --> 01:32:58,095
You didn't really fill out the form.

889
01:32:58,262 --> 01:33:00,178
Maybe you didn't have time,

890
01:33:00,345 --> 01:33:05,387
uh, so I will need
to ask a few more questions.

891
01:33:05,553 --> 01:33:09,095
What's the most important thing
in your life right now?

892
01:33:09,262 --> 01:33:13,345
It could be many things,
your family, your friends, your...

893
01:33:13,512 --> 01:33:15,637
The most important thing
for me right now

894
01:33:15,803 --> 01:33:17,928
is to get an abortion.

895
01:33:19,678 --> 01:33:22,762
Yes. Well, that's what
we're going to resolve together.

896
01:33:25,137 --> 01:33:27,595
I need some information.

897
01:33:30,220 --> 01:33:32,053
Do you love the father?

898
01:33:32,220 --> 01:33:35,512
That's none of your business.

899
01:33:35,678 --> 01:33:40,929
Well, it is my business
because I'm here to form

900
01:33:41,096 --> 01:33:43,846
an impression
of your circumstances.

901
01:33:44,013 --> 01:33:45,804
That's my job.

902
01:33:45,971 --> 01:33:47,763
Okay, so what would you
most like me

903
01:33:47,929 --> 01:33:51,429
to answer about the father in order
to get the fucking abortion?

904
01:33:51,596 --> 01:33:54,346
That I love him,
or that I don't love him?

905
01:33:54,513 --> 01:33:59,054
Or that I... I don't know him
because I fuck tons of men?

906
01:34:04,346 --> 01:34:07,304
I, uh, see that
you were emotional

907
01:34:07,471 --> 01:34:09,679
during the doctor's examination.

908
01:34:09,846 --> 01:34:11,971
I think you're emotional.

909
01:34:12,138 --> 01:34:16,179
Please, listen. This is what we call
an informative consultation.

910
01:34:16,346 --> 01:34:18,388
What is it I need
to be informed of?

911
01:34:18,554 --> 01:34:20,596
That you can't
stuff the kid back inside?

912
01:34:20,763 --> 01:34:23,263
I already know that.

913
01:34:24,513 --> 01:34:26,638
I just need to be certain

914
01:34:26,804 --> 01:34:29,013
that you're completely sure
about your choice,

915
01:34:29,179 --> 01:34:32,346
and my professional opinion
based on your behavior

916
01:34:32,513 --> 01:34:33,763
is that clearly you're not.

917
01:34:33,929 --> 01:34:36,096
I've never been more sure
in my life.

918
01:34:36,263 --> 01:34:38,846
I want that fetus out right now.

919
01:34:39,013 --> 01:34:42,221
And as a professional, I cannot
defend recommending an abortion

920
01:34:42,388 --> 01:34:43,471
based on this conversation.

921
01:34:43,679 --> 01:34:47,679
I've already had a kid!
I know what I want!

922
01:34:47,846 --> 01:34:49,221
Fuck you.

923
01:34:55,929 --> 01:34:58,804
There were,
of course, many ways to do it.

924
01:34:58,971 --> 01:35:01,596
But I had chosen to follow
the common medical procedure

925
01:35:01,763 --> 01:35:04,554
I had learnt
while studying medicine,

926
01:35:04,721 --> 01:35:06,846
as it was of great importance
for me

927
01:35:07,013 --> 01:35:10,346
to get the fetus out straight away
rather than wait for it

928
01:35:10,513 --> 01:35:13,429
to be expelled
a couple of days later.

929
01:36:36,554 --> 01:36:39,429
Clearly, the most painful part

930
01:36:39,596 --> 01:36:42,471
would be the gradual opening
of the cervix,

931
01:36:42,638 --> 01:36:46,888
which otherwise was always done
under anesthesia.

932
01:38:50,972 --> 01:38:53,430
wasps, sobs)

933
01:39:12,180 --> 01:39:14,347
Say something, Pierrot.

934
01:39:16,305 --> 01:39:17,389
What do you mean?

935
01:39:17,555 --> 01:39:20,347
Well, you always have
so many clever things to say.

936
01:39:26,180 --> 01:39:29,597
Well, I... I feel bad for you

937
01:39:29,764 --> 01:39:31,639
that you had to cause yourself
so much pain.

938
01:39:38,055 --> 01:39:42,472
But the... the abortion
is completely understandable.

939
01:39:42,639 --> 01:39:43,764
You simply thought the child

940
01:39:43,930 --> 01:39:46,389
wouldn't have
a life worth living, so...

941
01:39:47,014 --> 01:39:49,014
Yeah, but the abortion in itself.

942
01:39:49,180 --> 01:39:51,972
Abortion is not murder.
- Oh, come on.

943
01:39:52,139 --> 01:39:56,055
Don't fall back on false clichés
just for my sake.

944
01:39:56,222 --> 01:39:58,930
I ask again,
what about the abortion?

945
01:39:59,097 --> 01:40:00,222
I have no comment.

946
01:40:00,389 --> 01:40:03,389
I'm a big proponent
for abortion rights,

947
01:40:03,555 --> 01:40:06,139
but this is 100% female territory.

948
01:40:06,305 --> 01:40:08,555
I don't believe a man
can ever comprehend

949
01:40:08,722 --> 01:40:11,305
the situation or the pain.

950
01:40:11,472 --> 01:40:15,389
And when it comes to the method,
I think the less said, the better.

951
01:40:15,555 --> 01:40:18,555
Those are two
very interesting points of view.

952
01:40:18,722 --> 01:40:21,555
First, you say that as a man,

953
01:40:21,722 --> 01:40:23,847
you can't understand
a woman's feelings

954
01:40:24,014 --> 01:40:26,514
with regard to abortion.

955
01:40:26,680 --> 01:40:29,597
Well, that's a bit like saying
that I couldn't understand

956
01:40:29,764 --> 01:40:32,514
the victims of earthquakes
because they were Chinese.

957
01:40:34,055 --> 01:40:36,847
I thought we agreed that empathy

958
01:40:37,014 --> 01:40:39,764
was the foundation
of all humanism.

959
01:40:39,930 --> 01:40:42,847
But I can see that it's very
convenient for men

960
01:40:43,014 --> 01:40:46,097
to leave all that abortion
stuff to women.

961
01:40:46,264 --> 01:40:47,889
That way they don't have
to deal with the guilt

962
01:40:48,055 --> 01:40:51,014
and all of the small stuff.

963
01:40:51,180 --> 01:40:53,764
But your other remark
provokes me even more.

964
01:40:53,930 --> 01:40:57,222
You think my method
is not worth discussing?

965
01:40:59,347 --> 01:41:02,930
What enjoyment would I,
or let alone a young pregnant girl,

966
01:41:03,097 --> 01:41:04,889
have from hearing
all the lurid details

967
01:41:05,055 --> 01:41:09,139
about how a fetus is removed
in a clinic or any other way?

968
01:41:11,180 --> 01:41:12,972
Well, then,
we're back at the discussion

969
01:41:13,139 --> 01:41:15,680
about eating something
that was once alive.

970
01:41:15,847 --> 01:41:19,722
Do you really think
abortion is so repugnant

971
01:41:19,889 --> 01:41:21,472
if you believe
that we should know

972
01:41:21,639 --> 01:41:25,139
how animals are slaughtered
in order to eat them?

973
01:41:25,305 --> 01:41:27,305
Well, that's a fact
we have to live with,

974
01:41:27,472 --> 01:41:29,597
even if we try to repress it.

975
01:41:29,764 --> 01:41:31,180
Just as we do with abortion.

976
01:41:31,347 --> 01:41:34,180
Well, you sound
like a pro-lifer from Texas.

977
01:41:35,889 --> 01:41:37,514
I don't think so.

978
01:41:38,305 --> 01:41:41,055
First of all, I'm just
as much a pro-choice as you are.

979
01:41:41,222 --> 01:41:42,597
But on principle,

980
01:41:42,764 --> 01:41:46,680
I believe that taboos
are damaging for human beings.

981
01:41:47,722 --> 01:41:50,514
That's a relatively easy stance
for you to take.

982
01:41:53,472 --> 01:41:56,555
One that can be misconstrued
as a...

983
01:41:56,722 --> 01:41:59,555
as an argument
against pregnancy termination.

984
01:42:01,847 --> 01:42:03,389
I don't want
to belittle anything,

985
01:42:03,555 --> 01:42:06,972
but I can't see your abortion
as anything but a...

986
01:42:08,222 --> 01:42:09,847
luxury problem.

987
01:42:13,264 --> 01:42:15,430
A luxury problem?

988
01:42:15,597 --> 01:42:18,805
The really serious,
serious abortions,

989
01:42:18,972 --> 01:42:24,055
the ones that save lives,
far from our social spheres,

990
01:42:24,222 --> 01:42:25,889
you can't endanger them
just because you

991
01:42:26,055 --> 01:42:28,722
provocatively insist
on showing the gory details.

992
01:42:30,055 --> 01:42:33,555
Consider all the millions
of repressed women,

993
01:42:33,722 --> 01:42:38,264
the victims of rape
and incest, hunger.

994
01:42:38,430 --> 01:42:41,430
All those who,
maybe thanks to an abortion,

995
01:42:41,597 --> 01:42:42,640
have regained a new life,

996
01:42:42,806 --> 01:42:46,640
maybe saved a child
from starving to death.

997
01:42:46,806 --> 01:42:51,806
You can't harm them just because
of some principle of openness.

998
01:42:54,973 --> 01:42:59,723
Luckily, I was able to get the head
of the fetus out on the first try,

999
01:42:59,890 --> 01:43:01,640
but it rarely goes like that.

1000
01:43:01,806 --> 01:43:05,306
In the 12th week,
the diameter of the head

1001
01:43:05,473 --> 01:43:08,473
is a little more than
1.2 centimeters.

1002
01:43:08,640 --> 01:43:11,223
Therefore,
a very impressive instrument

1003
01:43:11,390 --> 01:43:13,265
has been developed
by the medical community.

1004
01:43:13,431 --> 01:43:16,140
The nutcracker is an instrument

1005
01:43:16,306 --> 01:43:20,098
that we use to get the fetus
out of the uterus completely.

1006
01:43:20,265 --> 01:43:24,473
We enter it into and through
the dilated cervical channel

1007
01:43:24,640 --> 01:43:27,056
and position it around the head
of the fetus,

1008
01:43:27,223 --> 01:43:30,306
and you crack it like a nut,

1009
01:43:30,473 --> 01:43:33,181
and then you pull out the fetus,
and there you have it.

1010
01:43:33,348 --> 01:43:35,931
That is the so-called nutcracker.

1011
01:43:36,098 --> 01:43:38,515
This is not something I need to know.

1012
01:43:39,848 --> 01:43:41,973
Oh, I hope you're not going

1013
01:43:42,140 --> 01:43:46,015
to be an opponent of abortion
based on that.

1014
01:43:46,181 --> 01:43:49,640
No, but you have to think
of the outrage

1015
01:43:49,806 --> 01:43:52,723
this knowledge would create
in society.

1016
01:43:52,890 --> 01:43:56,640
So, you're saying that people
in general are too stupid

1017
01:43:56,806 --> 01:44:00,973
to make decisions
on an informed basis.

1018
01:44:01,140 --> 01:44:05,348
And that coming from a man
who only an hour ago sermonized

1019
01:44:05,515 --> 01:44:07,890
about his belief
in human qualities.

1020
01:44:08,056 --> 01:44:10,931
No, you... you're simplifying things.

1021
01:44:11,098 --> 01:44:14,056
You can't look at it like that.

1022
01:44:14,223 --> 01:44:16,640
It's funny to see you
so emotional suddenly.

1023
01:44:21,556 --> 01:44:24,056
Looking back,
it rankles me a bit

1024
01:44:24,223 --> 01:44:28,390
that I didn't just
show up all calm and collected

1025
01:44:28,556 --> 01:44:31,931
at the appointment
with the psychologist

1026
01:44:32,098 --> 01:44:34,681
and have my abortion
under full anesthesia.

1027
01:44:34,848 --> 01:44:38,306
The fact is that when
you're completely under,

1028
01:44:38,473 --> 01:44:41,140
the fetus doesn't feel
anything either,

1029
01:44:41,306 --> 01:44:45,348
whereas my action, of course,
caused pain,

1030
01:44:45,515 --> 01:44:47,390
depending on how much consciousness

1031
01:44:47,556 --> 01:44:52,306
you want to ascribe
to a fetus about 12 weeks old.

1032
01:44:52,473 --> 01:44:55,015
I'm a bit nervous
about bringing that subject up,

1033
01:44:55,181 --> 01:44:57,473
as most of the abortions
in the world,

1034
01:44:57,640 --> 01:44:59,598
due to lack of resources,

1035
01:44:59,765 --> 01:45:03,890
occur just under
local anesthesia or none.

1036
01:45:05,931 --> 01:45:08,723
Well, you're a careful man.

1037
01:45:09,723 --> 01:45:13,890
Whether we talk about abortion
or not, you can't escape death,

1038
01:45:14,056 --> 01:45:17,973
and my fetus could have turned
out to be a fine human being,

1039
01:45:18,140 --> 01:45:21,765
but one that would
also eventually die.

1040
01:45:25,390 --> 01:45:27,806
What haunts me
is the ironic detail

1041
01:45:27,973 --> 01:45:30,765
that my father and I
were snail-gatherers.

1042
01:45:34,015 --> 01:45:38,181
We had the deepest compassion,
not to say sentimentality,

1043
01:45:38,348 --> 01:45:41,431
about the smallest living things
on the planet

1044
01:45:41,598 --> 01:45:43,890
which we demonstrated
by saving snails,

1045
01:45:44,056 --> 01:45:47,556
often, by the way,
the same size as my fetus,

1046
01:45:47,681 --> 01:45:50,431
from certain death on the path.

1047
01:45:50,598 --> 01:45:54,056
We did that only
when the other one wasn't watching,

1048
01:45:54,223 --> 01:45:56,390
as it was a bit embarrassing.

1049
01:45:57,765 --> 01:46:00,223
Are you picking up snails?

1050
01:46:01,515 --> 01:46:03,181
No.

1051
01:46:05,056 --> 01:46:06,556
Are you sure you weren't
picking up snails?

1052
01:46:06,723 --> 01:46:08,348
Yeah.
- You're sure?

1053
01:46:08,515 --> 01:46:10,598
Yeah.

1054
01:46:12,973 --> 01:46:16,848
Shall we drop the subject?
- Yes, please.

1055
01:46:17,015 --> 01:46:19,098
Are you sure
you don't want a little tour

1056
01:46:19,265 --> 01:46:21,140
of the technical details

1057
01:46:21,306 --> 01:46:23,973
of removal of organs
for organ donations?

1058
01:46:24,140 --> 01:46:26,556
No, thank you. I'm fine.

1059
01:46:29,223 --> 01:46:30,181
Where were we?

1060
01:46:31,140 --> 01:46:35,223
I think something about your boss
sending you to see a psychologist.

1061
01:46:35,390 --> 01:46:37,223
Yes, that's right.

1062
01:46:42,640 --> 01:46:45,181
My name is Joe.
- Hi, Joe.

1063
01:46:45,348 --> 01:46:49,348
And I'm a nymphomaniac.
- Sex addict.

1064
01:46:49,515 --> 01:46:52,098
My name is Joe,
and I'm a nymphomaniac.

1065
01:46:52,265 --> 01:46:55,640
We say sex addict.
Here, everyone's the same.

1066
01:47:00,390 --> 01:47:04,681
Renée, last time you
told us you had a plan.

1067
01:47:04,848 --> 01:47:06,723
How did it go?

1068
01:47:06,890 --> 01:47:10,973
I thought of trying something new,
as nothing had helped.

1069
01:47:12,515 --> 01:47:16,099
I thought if I overdosed...

1070
01:47:16,266 --> 01:47:18,474
in other words,
if I did the exact opposite

1071
01:47:18,641 --> 01:47:20,974
of what we are trying
to do here,

1072
01:47:21,141 --> 01:47:22,557
then I could get well.

1073
01:47:22,724 --> 01:47:25,182
You mean function normally.

1074
01:47:25,349 --> 01:47:28,599
I had prepared
the whole thing very carefully.

1075
01:47:28,766 --> 01:47:31,807
Sent my husband away
for the weekend

1076
01:47:31,974 --> 01:47:35,807
and had the children
taken care of.

1077
01:47:35,974 --> 01:47:37,974
It was to happen on the Saturday.

1078
01:47:40,307 --> 01:47:45,391
I had... I had collected
phone numbers for a whole month,

1079
01:47:45,557 --> 01:47:48,557
and then back in the coal.

1080
01:48:27,474 --> 01:48:30,766
They fucked me for three hours.

1081
01:48:31,057 --> 01:48:34,057
And how did
you feel about that?

1082
01:48:34,224 --> 01:48:37,141
Well, I never feel good afterwards.
I feel ashamed.

1083
01:48:38,224 --> 01:48:40,641
But in relation to...
to your addiction,

1084
01:48:40,807 --> 01:48:43,599
do you feel relieved
like you thought you would?

1085
01:48:46,307 --> 01:48:47,474
No.

1086
01:48:48,974 --> 01:48:52,849
What should I do?
I'm ready to do what's necessary.

1087
01:48:53,016 --> 01:48:55,849
Sex addiction
is very different from,

1088
01:48:56,016 --> 01:48:58,641
say, abuse of drugs or alcohol

1089
01:48:58,807 --> 01:49:01,391
because you don't actually need
either of those things.

1090
01:49:01,557 --> 01:49:03,682
These addictions can
be completely removed

1091
01:49:03,849 --> 01:49:08,307
by removing the drug or the alcohol,
not that that's easy.

1092
01:49:08,474 --> 01:49:11,016
But the difference
with sex addiction

1093
01:49:11,182 --> 01:49:14,266
is that everyone has a sexuality

1094
01:49:14,432 --> 01:49:16,974
that's an integral part
of their personality.

1095
01:49:18,891 --> 01:49:24,057
If one could
imagine exterminating sexuality,

1096
01:49:24,224 --> 01:49:26,307
then you'd be left
with a severely reduced person

1097
01:49:26,474 --> 01:49:30,932
because... because sexuality
also includes tenderness,

1098
01:49:31,099 --> 01:49:34,599
contact, solidarity with others,

1099
01:49:34,766 --> 01:49:37,891
which would be hard to imagine
anyone living without on some level.

1100
01:49:39,516 --> 01:49:43,182
What you're saying is that no one
can remove their sexuality,

1101
01:49:43,349 --> 01:49:45,641
even though it's destroying
everything for them.

1102
01:49:45,807 --> 01:49:47,682
I wouldn't say no one,

1103
01:49:47,849 --> 01:49:50,516
but let's say, at most,
one in a million

1104
01:49:50,682 --> 01:49:53,474
manage to live a life
without sexuality.

1105
01:49:53,641 --> 01:49:57,307
But you can't be basing your therapy
on that one in a million.

1106
01:49:57,432 --> 01:50:00,891
No. The first
and most important step

1107
01:50:01,057 --> 01:50:04,807
is to remove incentive
and to reduce exposure.

1108
01:50:06,432 --> 01:50:08,224
You have to ask yourself

1109
01:50:08,391 --> 01:50:11,432
what kind of incentives you have
and then make it difficult

1110
01:50:11,599 --> 01:50:13,349
for yourself to come
into contact with them.

1111
01:50:13,516 --> 01:50:17,391
Basically, anything that
makes you think about sex.

1112
01:52:25,850 --> 01:52:28,017
Stop it.

1113
01:52:32,142 --> 01:52:35,225
Joe has something
she'd like to share.

1114
01:52:36,475 --> 01:52:38,892
My name is Joe.
- Hi, Joe.

1115
01:52:39,058 --> 01:52:40,850
And I'm a sex addict,

1116
01:52:41,017 --> 01:52:45,267
but I haven't had sex
for three weeks and five days.

1117
01:52:48,517 --> 01:52:49,600
Tell us how you did it, Joe.

1118
01:52:49,767 --> 01:52:52,892
You brought notes?
- Yes.

1119
01:52:58,225 --> 01:53:03,267
Dear everyone,
don't think it's been easy,

1120
01:53:03,433 --> 01:53:06,933
but I understand now
that we are all alike.

1121
01:53:21,975 --> 01:53:26,308
Are you okay, Joe?
- Yes, yes.

1122
01:53:30,767 --> 01:53:32,725
Would you like
a glass of water?

1123
01:53:35,433 --> 01:53:37,017
Thank you.

1124
01:53:45,767 --> 01:53:47,892
Would you rather share another time?

1125
01:53:53,683 --> 01:53:56,058
No, I'd like to speak.

1126
01:54:01,100 --> 01:54:06,350
Dear everyone,
don't think it's been easy,

1127
01:54:06,517 --> 01:54:08,725
but I understand now

1128
01:54:08,892 --> 01:54:12,892
that we're not
and never will be alike.

1129
01:54:15,142 --> 01:54:19,850
I'm not like you,
who fucks to be validated

1130
01:54:20,017 --> 01:54:22,558
and might just as well give up
putting cocks inside you.

1131
01:54:22,725 --> 01:54:26,392
You already got your bloody kick
a long time ago

1132
01:54:26,558 --> 01:54:29,142
when it turned out that someone
was even bothered to fuck you.

1133
01:54:29,308 --> 01:54:31,183
And I'm not like you.

1134
01:54:31,350 --> 01:54:33,225
Eat yourself to death
if you want.

1135
01:54:33,392 --> 01:54:35,475
I have no pity for you.

1136
01:54:35,642 --> 01:54:37,350
All you want is to be filled up,

1137
01:54:37,517 --> 01:54:42,517
and whether it's by a man
or by tons of disgusting slop

1138
01:54:42,683 --> 01:54:44,600
makes no difference,

1139
01:54:44,767 --> 01:54:46,975
because it's all just
a pathetic attempt

1140
01:54:47,142 --> 01:54:50,017
at filling out
your own resounding emptiness

1141
01:54:50,225 --> 01:54:55,058
and hiding your ridiculous
egocentric self-loathing.

1142
01:54:55,225 --> 01:54:57,725
And I'm definitely not like you.

1143
01:54:57,892 --> 01:55:02,058
That empathy you claim is a lie

1144
01:55:02,225 --> 01:55:06,267
because all you are
is society's morality police,

1145
01:55:06,433 --> 01:55:11,558
whose duty is to erase my obscenity
from the surface of the Earth,

1146
01:55:11,725 --> 01:55:14,558
so that the bourgeoisie
won't feel sick.

1147
01:55:17,767 --> 01:55:19,433
I'm not like you.

1148
01:55:20,642 --> 01:55:25,392
I am a nymphomaniac,
and I love myself for being one,

1149
01:55:25,558 --> 01:55:29,933
but above all, I love my cunt

1150
01:55:30,100 --> 01:55:33,225
and my filthy, dirty lust.

1151
01:55:56,558 --> 01:55:58,683
What just happened?

1152
01:55:58,850 --> 01:56:02,892
I didn't get that,
with the car that burned.

1153
01:56:03,058 --> 01:56:04,642
No, I'm sorry.

1154
01:56:04,808 --> 01:56:08,433
I was just in too much of
a hurry to get to the last chapter.

1155
01:56:18,476 --> 01:56:20,476
It's dawning.

1156
01:56:20,643 --> 01:56:23,268
How can you tell?

1157
01:56:23,434 --> 01:56:26,184
Oh, it's...
it's just a slight coloring.

1158
01:56:26,351 --> 01:56:29,768
I know because I've stood here
so often at this time.

1159
01:56:31,143 --> 01:56:33,476
You could say
I've developed an ability

1160
01:56:33,643 --> 01:56:37,434
to see dawn before everyone else.

1161
01:56:41,101 --> 01:56:43,934
Then you understand
what I mean when I say

1162
01:56:44,101 --> 01:56:48,351
that twilight suddenly appeared
at this point in my story.

1163
01:56:50,101 --> 01:56:53,726
I understood that society
had no room for me,

1164
01:56:53,893 --> 01:56:58,434
and I had no room for society
and never had.

1165
01:57:00,184 --> 01:57:02,476
It would've been much, much easier

1166
01:57:02,643 --> 01:57:04,893
to have realized that earlier on,

1167
01:57:05,059 --> 01:57:08,226
but suddenly,

1168
01:57:08,393 --> 01:57:11,143
my senses unfolded dramatically.

1169
01:57:12,976 --> 01:57:16,976
To go from the respectable
daylight side of society

1170
01:57:17,143 --> 01:57:19,518
to the shady, nocturnal side

1171
01:57:20,393 --> 01:57:22,601
was like changing sides in a war.

1172
01:57:23,684 --> 01:57:26,143
You put your old army behind you,

1173
01:57:26,309 --> 01:57:29,684
and suddenly, the next second,
you're swallowed by the new one.

1174
01:57:29,851 --> 01:57:32,226
There's no in between.

1175
01:57:46,309 --> 01:57:48,309
I'm sure it was quite natural for you

1176
01:57:48,476 --> 01:57:50,809
to furnish your room
as a monk's cell,

1177
01:57:50,976 --> 01:57:55,476
but as an inspiration
for this story, chapter headings

1178
01:57:55,643 --> 01:57:57,768
hasn't been easy.

1179
01:57:57,934 --> 01:58:01,018
There's simply nothing
left for me to use.

1180
01:58:02,601 --> 01:58:04,601
Well, I'm sorry about that.

1181
01:58:05,934 --> 01:58:08,476
But if I may,
I can give you a tip.

1182
01:58:09,851 --> 01:58:11,726
Yes, please.

1183
01:58:11,893 --> 01:58:14,601
You know, I occupy myself
mostly with texts,

1184
01:58:14,768 --> 01:58:18,101
but sometimes the text can seem so...

1185
01:58:18,268 --> 01:58:22,143
so empty, so unfathomably empty.

1186
01:58:22,309 --> 01:58:26,268
It could be the best text
by the most famous author.

1187
01:58:26,434 --> 01:58:30,059
The solution might be
to change your point of view.

1188
01:58:31,768 --> 01:58:33,726
I don't get that.

1189
01:58:33,893 --> 01:58:39,059
Things hide
when they become familiar.

1190
01:58:39,226 --> 01:58:43,226
But if you look at them
from another angle,

1191
01:58:43,393 --> 01:58:46,184
they might take
on a new meaning.

1192
01:58:57,309 --> 01:58:58,601
You're right.

1193
01:58:59,726 --> 01:59:04,351
Before this was just the stain
from the tea I threw.

1194
01:59:05,809 --> 01:59:08,476
Can you see what it could be?

1195
01:59:09,934 --> 01:59:11,268
A revolver!

1196
01:59:11,434 --> 01:59:14,976
No, a revolver has a drum
that revolves.

1197
01:59:15,143 --> 01:59:17,143
It's a pistol.

1198
01:59:17,309 --> 01:59:20,018
Can you see what kind it could be?

1199
01:59:20,184 --> 01:59:23,309
No, I don't remember anything
like that from my literature.

1200
01:59:23,476 --> 01:59:25,893
Oh, but it's something
I can remember from mine.

1201
01:59:26,059 --> 01:59:30,351
Ian Fleming.
- Not familiar.

1202
01:59:30,518 --> 01:59:33,768
If you haven't read that,
you haven't read anything at all.

1203
01:59:35,143 --> 01:59:38,143
This could be,
with a little imagination,

1204
01:59:38,309 --> 01:59:41,934
a Walther PPK automatic,

1205
01:59:42,101 --> 01:59:44,351
the same gun
that was issued to Bond,

1206
01:59:44,518 --> 01:59:47,934
after his preferred pistol,
the Beretta, had jammed.

1207
01:59:49,726 --> 01:59:51,143
Is that something you can use?

1208
01:59:53,101 --> 01:59:55,018
Oh, yes, it is.

1209
02:00:04,643 --> 02:00:09,143
Whether I left
society or it left me, I cannot say.

1210
02:00:09,309 --> 02:00:12,434
I suppose you could make
an argument for both sides.

1211
02:00:13,893 --> 02:00:15,893
I was on my way
to the shady side

1212
02:00:16,059 --> 02:00:19,434
of the debt collecting business,
which, among other things,

1213
02:00:19,601 --> 02:00:22,726
involves stuff like
burning people's cars.

1214
02:00:24,768 --> 02:00:28,684
I had for a long time
known about this man, L.

1215
02:00:33,976 --> 02:00:36,184
Hi, my name is Joe.

1216
02:00:36,351 --> 02:00:40,268
I know that. Come in.

1217
02:00:44,893 --> 02:00:46,851
I'm looking for a job.

1218
02:00:48,394 --> 02:00:49,810
I've been working in an office,

1219
02:00:49,977 --> 02:00:52,477
and I was never really good at it.

1220
02:00:52,644 --> 02:00:56,269
I can understand that.
I mean, what's the point?

1221
02:00:58,935 --> 02:01:02,727
I've thought of you now and then
and wondered when you'd show up.

1222
02:01:06,394 --> 02:01:10,394
My lifestyle is relatively expensive,

1223
02:01:12,227 --> 02:01:15,685
and I need a fair amount
of free time for a sideline.

1224
02:01:15,852 --> 02:01:17,769
Of course.
I already know that.

1225
02:01:17,935 --> 02:01:20,810
I believe I possess
some qualifications

1226
02:01:20,977 --> 02:01:23,227
and that I'm rather unscrupulous.

1227
02:01:23,394 --> 02:01:26,977
I know all about your qualifications
and they're excellent.

1228
02:01:27,144 --> 02:01:30,769
And you have already proven you
are unscrupulous by coming here.

1229
02:01:33,352 --> 02:01:37,810
I would suggest that you start
your own little business

1230
02:01:37,977 --> 02:01:39,852
with my help.

1231
02:01:40,019 --> 02:01:44,019
I understand you possess
a great deal of insight

1232
02:01:44,185 --> 02:01:47,060
about a rather broad spectrum of men.

1233
02:01:48,394 --> 02:01:52,477
This could be, or should be,
capitalized on.

1234
02:01:52,644 --> 02:01:55,144
What should I do?

1235
02:01:55,310 --> 02:01:58,269
I facilitate certain assignments
for my humble firm

1236
02:01:58,435 --> 02:02:00,519
as part of a debt
collection business.

1237
02:02:00,685 --> 02:02:03,185
In other words,
I need subcontractors

1238
02:02:03,352 --> 02:02:06,060
who can put moderate pressure
on individuals,

1239
02:02:06,227 --> 02:02:10,144
with whom my clients rightly
or wrongly have a bone to pick.

1240
02:02:10,310 --> 02:02:12,769
Understand?
- Extortion.

1241
02:02:12,935 --> 02:02:14,727
No. No, no, no, no.

1242
02:02:14,894 --> 02:02:19,644
I always prefer
the term 'debt collection.'

1243
02:02:21,352 --> 02:02:23,019
Yeah.
- I refrain from judging

1244
02:02:23,185 --> 02:02:27,435
whether my clients' wishes
are legitimate or otherwise,

1245
02:02:27,560 --> 02:02:31,894
a point of view I strongly
recommend you follow.

1246
02:02:33,560 --> 02:02:38,727
I'm still unsure of what it is
I should do.

1247
02:02:38,894 --> 02:02:40,977
Well, you'll need two thugs,

1248
02:02:41,144 --> 02:02:43,685
and I can think of two good ones.

1249
02:02:43,852 --> 02:02:48,394
They both have a lot of experience
and can show you the ropes.

1250
02:02:49,519 --> 02:02:51,394
That's interesting.

1251
02:02:51,560 --> 02:02:54,560
It's not at all interesting.

1252
02:02:54,727 --> 02:02:56,977
Most interesting thing about it was

1253
02:02:57,144 --> 02:03:00,019
how easily I dedicated
myself to crime.

1254
02:03:00,185 --> 02:03:02,394
My main
qualification, of course,

1255
02:03:02,560 --> 02:03:05,644
was my considerable experience
with men and sex.

1256
02:03:05,810 --> 02:03:09,852
But even my more specialized
skills came in handy.

1257
02:03:31,519 --> 02:03:35,394
No, now this is not how it goes.

1258
02:03:35,560 --> 02:03:37,894
You have to wait until you're hit.

1259
02:03:40,602 --> 02:03:44,310
The two helpers that
L had recommended were okay,

1260
02:03:44,477 --> 02:03:47,977
but they were predisposed
to a rather repetitive technique,

1261
02:03:48,144 --> 02:03:51,935
which consisted of creating
as much havoc as possible

1262
02:03:52,102 --> 02:03:53,519
with a pair of iron bars.

1263
02:04:09,185 --> 02:04:13,519
Destroying your things doesn't
seem to have much effect on you.

1264
02:04:13,685 --> 02:04:15,144
The only thing
worth mentioning

1265
02:04:15,310 --> 02:04:17,519
from my first years
as a collector

1266
02:04:17,685 --> 02:04:21,435
was the story of an unusually
sober-minded,

1267
02:04:21,602 --> 02:04:24,394
and for that reason vulnerable, man.

1268
02:04:24,560 --> 02:04:27,435
The dirt I threatened
to go public with

1269
02:04:27,602 --> 02:04:31,102
was normally within
my core competence: sex.

1270
02:04:31,977 --> 02:04:36,602
But for once, here was a man
I was unable to read sexually,

1271
02:04:36,769 --> 02:04:39,394
so I became persistent.

1272
02:04:39,560 --> 02:04:41,394
Tie him to the chair.

1273
02:04:43,060 --> 02:04:44,727
Don't hurt him.

1274
02:04:48,060 --> 02:04:50,310
I can't find a stain on you,

1275
02:04:51,185 --> 02:04:54,144
but my experience tells me
that no man is spotless.

1276
02:04:55,352 --> 02:04:59,352
Luckily, you're equipped with
a very reliable truth detector.

1277
02:05:09,935 --> 02:05:12,810
I'm going to tell you a few stories.

1278
02:05:12,977 --> 02:05:15,352
All you have to do is listen.

1279
02:05:17,394 --> 02:05:20,520
You're in a bar watching a couple...

1280
02:05:20,686 --> 02:05:23,228
I now meticulously
went through the catalogue

1281
02:05:23,395 --> 02:05:26,603
of sexual deviations
in fictional form.

1282
02:05:26,770 --> 02:05:29,686
Stories about sado-masochism,

1283
02:05:29,853 --> 02:05:33,978
fetishism, homosexuality,
you name it.

1284
02:05:34,145 --> 02:05:35,853
But he didn't react.

1285
02:05:36,020 --> 02:05:38,478
And I'd almost given up
when I said...

1286
02:05:38,645 --> 02:05:43,270
On your way home,
you walk through the park.

1287
02:05:48,020 --> 02:05:49,728
And something makes you stop.

1288
02:05:50,853 --> 02:05:52,686
You hear something.

1289
02:06:06,895 --> 02:06:08,603
Yes, that's it.

1290
02:06:08,770 --> 02:06:12,478
You can hear the children
in the playground.

1291
02:06:13,603 --> 02:06:18,061
You sit on a bench nearby
and watch them play.

1292
02:06:18,228 --> 02:06:21,395
There's a little boy in shorts.

1293
02:06:22,770 --> 02:06:24,978
He's playing in the sandpit.

1294
02:06:26,978 --> 02:06:31,853
He looks at you
with his blue eyes.

1295
02:06:33,395 --> 02:06:35,103
He smiles at you.

1296
02:06:35,270 --> 02:06:37,436
I think he comes to you.

1297
02:06:37,645 --> 02:06:42,770
He sits on your lap
and looks up at your face.

1298
02:06:43,436 --> 02:06:47,686
He says he'd like
to come home with you.

1299
02:06:51,853 --> 02:06:53,103
At home,

1300
02:06:53,270 --> 02:06:56,561
you can't fight the idea
of being naked together.

1301
02:06:57,561 --> 02:07:00,020
He crawls all over you.

1302
02:07:00,186 --> 02:07:01,811
You get an erection.

1303
02:07:01,978 --> 02:07:04,061
Won't you please stop?

1304
02:07:04,228 --> 02:07:06,978
He lies on his stomach.

1305
02:07:07,770 --> 02:07:10,603
You pull down his pants.

1306
02:07:10,770 --> 02:07:12,395
I'll pay!

1307
02:07:44,770 --> 02:07:47,020
You did what?

1308
02:07:47,186 --> 02:07:48,936
I gave him a blowjob.

1309
02:07:49,103 --> 02:07:52,770
Why? That pig!
- I took pity on him.

1310
02:07:52,936 --> 02:07:54,270
Pity?

1311
02:07:54,436 --> 02:07:57,936
Yes. I had just destroyed his life.

1312
02:07:58,103 --> 02:08:02,270
Nobody knew his secret,
most probably not even himself.

1313
02:08:03,478 --> 02:08:06,061
He sat there with the shame.

1314
02:08:06,228 --> 02:08:09,478
I suppose I sucked him off
as a kind of apology.

1315
02:08:09,645 --> 02:08:10,686
That's unbelievable.

1316
02:08:11,978 --> 02:08:14,853
No, listen to me.
This is a man who'd succeeded

1317
02:08:15,020 --> 02:08:16,978
in repressing his own desire,

1318
02:08:17,145 --> 02:08:22,270
who had never before given into it,
right up until I forced it out.

1319
02:08:22,436 --> 02:08:24,936
He had lived a life full of denial

1320
02:08:25,103 --> 02:08:27,520
and had never hurt a soul.

1321
02:08:27,686 --> 02:08:30,520
I think that's laudable.

1322
02:08:30,686 --> 02:08:31,728
No matter how much I try,

1323
02:08:31,895 --> 02:08:34,478
I can't find anything laudable
in pedophilia.

1324
02:08:34,645 --> 02:08:37,520
That's because you think
about the perhaps five percent

1325
02:08:37,686 --> 02:08:40,103
who actually hurt children.

1326
02:08:40,270 --> 02:08:45,020
The remaining 95 percent
never live out their fantasies.

1327
02:08:45,186 --> 02:08:47,603
Think about their suffering.

1328
02:08:47,770 --> 02:08:52,686
Sexuality is the strongest force
in human beings.

1329
02:08:52,853 --> 02:08:57,686
To be born with a forbidden
sexuality must be agonizing.

1330
02:08:57,853 --> 02:09:01,270
The pedophile
who manages to get through life

1331
02:09:01,436 --> 02:09:03,520
with the shame of his desire

1332
02:09:03,686 --> 02:09:07,478
while never acting on it,
deserves a bloody medal.

1333
02:09:14,561 --> 02:09:18,186
The writer Thomas Mann
said somewhere

1334
02:09:18,353 --> 02:09:20,436
that a temptation resisted

1335
02:09:20,603 --> 02:09:24,895
is not a sin
but a test of virtue.

1336
02:09:28,645 --> 02:09:32,270
Wasn't there something
about that writer and boys?

1337
02:09:32,436 --> 02:09:35,020
Yeah, so they say.

1338
02:09:35,186 --> 02:09:38,353
I suppose he dealt with it
by writing them out.

1339
02:09:38,520 --> 02:09:41,270
And he got a medal, a Nobel Prize.

1340
02:09:45,770 --> 02:09:48,895
But there was
another reason for my sympathy,

1341
02:09:49,061 --> 02:09:51,396
which you find so mysterious.

1342
02:09:53,271 --> 02:09:57,271
I saw a man who was carrying
the same cross as myself.

1343
02:09:59,896 --> 02:10:01,979
Loneliness.

1344
02:10:05,187 --> 02:10:07,979
We were both sexual outcasts.

1345
02:10:16,479 --> 02:10:18,479
In any case,
some years passed,

1346
02:10:18,646 --> 02:10:21,604
during which my business grew,

1347
02:10:21,771 --> 02:10:26,354
enabling me to step up my
anonymous deposits to Marcel.

1348
02:10:27,271 --> 02:10:30,812
Your business is doing great.

1349
02:10:30,979 --> 02:10:34,771
You complete all the jobs
I give you to perfection.

1350
02:10:34,937 --> 02:10:39,604
And I hear only words of praise
from your other clients, but...

1351
02:10:39,771 --> 02:10:42,687
But what?
- We aren't getting any younger.

1352
02:10:42,854 --> 02:10:46,854
No, that's for sure.

1353
02:10:47,021 --> 02:10:48,479
I think you're getting to that age

1354
02:10:48,646 --> 02:10:50,646
where you have to start thinking
about a successor.

1355
02:10:50,812 --> 02:10:54,521
Oh, I don't need a fucking successor.

1356
02:10:54,687 --> 02:10:56,354
Listen.

1357
02:10:56,521 --> 02:10:59,896
A person should take
their crime seriously.

1358
02:11:00,062 --> 02:11:03,187
You need someone
to be your right hand,

1359
02:11:03,354 --> 02:11:07,187
someone to help you.
A crown princess.

1360
02:11:09,479 --> 02:11:12,729
The normal process is to find out

1361
02:11:12,896 --> 02:11:16,354
what colleagues are in prison,
or are drug addicts,

1362
02:11:16,521 --> 02:11:21,187
and thereby unable to fulfill
their roles as parents.

1363
02:11:21,354 --> 02:11:25,687
Then, you find out
where their kids play football,

1364
02:11:25,854 --> 02:11:28,146
and you get involved.

1365
02:11:28,312 --> 02:11:30,062
You cheer them on
for a couple of years,

1366
02:11:30,229 --> 02:11:33,687
no matter how bad they are.
Actually, the worse, the better.

1367
02:11:33,854 --> 02:11:37,812
That way, gradually, you take on
the role of the parent

1368
02:11:37,979 --> 02:11:41,729
until, in the end,
you have a loyal helper

1369
02:11:41,896 --> 02:11:45,187
that will walk through fire for you.

1370
02:11:45,354 --> 02:11:47,396
Even do time for you.

1371
02:11:51,146 --> 02:11:55,271
It sounds like a kind of
an entrapment you're suggesting.

1372
02:11:55,437 --> 02:11:58,896
An unsavory entrapment.
- Call it what you want,

1373
02:11:59,062 --> 02:12:03,021
but if you believe at all in
the effects of good parenting,

1374
02:12:03,187 --> 02:12:06,104
that kid will have much greater
opportunities with you

1375
02:12:06,271 --> 02:12:08,687
as a mentor than without.

1376
02:12:08,854 --> 02:12:11,229
And since I like you,

1377
02:12:11,396 --> 02:12:15,229
I've been looking around
for a suitable subject.

1378
02:12:15,396 --> 02:12:20,687
She's 15 years old from
a family of hardened criminals,

1379
02:12:20,854 --> 02:12:23,187
and she's been through a lot.

1380
02:12:23,354 --> 02:12:26,437
Last couple of years
she's been institutionalized.

1381
02:12:26,604 --> 02:12:29,146
Her father's in prison
and her mother died of an overdose.

1382
02:12:29,312 --> 02:12:31,021
She's a smart girl.

1383
02:12:31,187 --> 02:12:33,104
And although
she doesn't play football,

1384
02:12:33,271 --> 02:12:36,062
she does play basketball very badly.

1385
02:12:37,312 --> 02:12:42,687
She's chosen a team sport
because she's lonely.

1386
02:12:42,854 --> 02:12:45,854
I saved the best part for last.

1387
02:12:46,021 --> 02:12:48,979
Her right ear is slightly deformed,

1388
02:12:49,146 --> 02:12:52,854
which she is very ashamed of,

1389
02:12:53,021 --> 02:12:56,021
and of course, this serves
to isolate her even more.

1390
02:12:56,187 --> 02:13:00,521
It makes her an easy target
for even the slightest bit

1391
02:13:00,687 --> 02:13:05,437
of attention
or sign of empathy from you.

1392
02:13:09,396 --> 02:13:12,979
Despite my protests,
the clever L somehow talked me

1393
02:13:13,146 --> 02:13:14,771
into actually having a look at P.

1394
02:13:17,562 --> 02:13:20,937
The longer I watched the poor girl
with the deformed ear,

1395
02:13:21,104 --> 02:13:24,312
the more repulsive
I found the whole plan.

1396
02:13:51,229 --> 02:13:53,229
But as if L had foreseen this,

1397
02:13:53,396 --> 02:13:59,062
the meeting with P filled me
with pity and emotion.

1398
02:13:59,229 --> 02:14:00,937
And without wanting to,

1399
02:14:01,104 --> 02:14:04,354
I found myself,
weekend after weekend,

1400
02:14:04,521 --> 02:14:08,229
at her games
supporting the poor player.

1401
02:14:23,272 --> 02:14:26,813
Thanks for cheering me on.
- You're welcome.

1402
02:14:26,980 --> 02:14:29,230
You played really well today.

1403
02:14:31,647 --> 02:14:34,313
No, I didn't.
- You did.

1404
02:14:34,480 --> 02:14:37,522
You really improved yourself lately.

1405
02:14:49,022 --> 02:14:52,772
Sixteen years. Congratulations.

1406
02:14:52,938 --> 02:14:55,730
Thank you.
- You're welcome.

1407
02:15:18,480 --> 02:15:20,022
I was proud to introduce P

1408
02:15:20,188 --> 02:15:22,855
to my father's passion
and his world.

1409
02:15:25,938 --> 02:15:27,730
It's actually...

1410
02:15:29,188 --> 02:15:33,147
the souls of the trees
that we see in the winter.

1411
02:15:39,563 --> 02:15:42,188
I think they look like human souls.

1412
02:15:46,272 --> 02:15:48,147
Yeah, you're right.

1413
02:15:49,022 --> 02:15:51,772
They do look like human souls.

1414
02:15:51,980 --> 02:15:55,188
Twisted souls, regular souls,

1415
02:15:55,355 --> 02:15:57,438
crazy souls,

1416
02:15:57,605 --> 02:16:01,272
all depending on the kind
of lives human beings lead.

1417
02:16:04,147 --> 02:16:08,563
Then that must be
Miss Williamson from number 21.

1418
02:16:08,730 --> 02:16:11,230
That's not a very nice thing
to say about Miss Williamson.

1419
02:16:11,397 --> 02:16:14,938
But she's always angry.
She has a monster in her belly.

1420
02:16:15,105 --> 02:16:17,647
Well, she does have
an ulcer in her belly

1421
02:16:17,813 --> 02:16:19,480
that I've been treating
for the last 15 years.

1422
02:16:22,063 --> 02:16:24,480
And sure enough,
one of the following days

1423
02:16:24,647 --> 02:16:26,897
my dad dragged me
into the woods again.

1424
02:16:27,063 --> 02:16:30,855
I found my tree.
My soul tree.

1425
02:16:33,188 --> 02:16:38,938
And no, it's not that one, okay,
'cause then I would be dead.

1426
02:16:40,855 --> 02:16:43,063
This is my tree.

1427
02:16:46,438 --> 02:16:50,563
It's not an ash tree.
- No, it's an oak tree.

1428
02:16:53,772 --> 02:16:55,647
It has two trunks.

1429
02:16:55,813 --> 02:16:59,022
Yeah, isn't it great?

1430
02:16:59,188 --> 02:17:04,397
It shows itself to both sides,
the lake and the forest.

1431
02:17:14,397 --> 02:17:18,688
But, Dad, how does
a tree get two trunks?

1432
02:17:20,313 --> 02:17:24,272
The most common reason
is that the top broke

1433
02:17:24,438 --> 02:17:26,313
when it was very young.

1434
02:17:26,480 --> 02:17:30,313
That means
that you've been broken once.

1435
02:17:30,480 --> 02:17:32,522
Have you, Dad?

1436
02:17:38,730 --> 02:17:41,938
It seems that it can be
rather revealing...

1437
02:17:43,397 --> 02:17:45,688
to find your soul tree.

1438
02:17:49,688 --> 02:17:55,313
My father found his soul tree,
but I've never found mine.

1439
02:17:55,855 --> 02:18:01,022
'You will know it when you see it,'
is what he said.

1440
02:18:07,605 --> 02:18:13,438
Kitchen and dining room.
And in here...

1441
02:18:15,272 --> 02:18:17,605
When P reached the age of maturity

1442
02:18:17,772 --> 02:18:20,063
and I became her personal adviser,

1443
02:18:20,230 --> 02:18:22,730
I asked her to move in with me.

1444
02:18:31,147 --> 02:18:33,897
Let me see you with your hair up.

1445
02:18:34,063 --> 02:18:36,563
You're so pretty.

1446
02:18:48,605 --> 02:18:52,313
All this time
all my sexual activity had stopped.

1447
02:18:52,480 --> 02:18:57,023
My groin was one big sore
from my abuse that wouldn't heal,

1448
02:18:57,189 --> 02:19:00,023
and made even
masturbation impossible.

1449
02:19:04,273 --> 02:19:07,564
I experienced definite
abstinence symptoms...

1450
02:19:07,731 --> 02:19:09,689
fever and cramps.

1451
02:19:34,648 --> 02:19:36,398
Joe, what's going on?

1452
02:19:38,606 --> 02:19:41,398
Careful.
- We need to clear this up.

1453
02:19:50,273 --> 02:19:53,231
I just get this sometimes.

1454
02:19:56,564 --> 02:19:59,064
It's okay. It's okay.

1455
02:20:03,148 --> 02:20:05,648
Do you want to go back to bed?

1456
02:20:07,648 --> 02:20:09,856
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

1457
02:20:25,981 --> 02:20:27,856
I love you, Joe.

1458
02:20:28,023 --> 02:20:29,773
I love you, too.

1459
02:20:31,189 --> 02:20:33,523
I don't mean it in that way.

1460
02:20:36,564 --> 02:20:39,981
Come on, it's late.
You should go back to bed.

1461
02:20:41,523 --> 02:20:42,564
Good night.

1462
02:20:45,439 --> 02:20:47,856
Perhaps she really loved you.

1463
02:20:51,939 --> 02:20:55,314
She was so very young.

1464
02:20:55,481 --> 02:20:59,773
Maybe she, too, discovered
her cunt at the age of two.

1465
02:20:59,939 --> 02:21:02,064
Maybe earlier.

1466
02:21:02,231 --> 02:21:03,773
I couldn't accept it.

1467
02:21:03,939 --> 02:21:07,731
Perhaps because you
really wanted it to be true.

1468
02:21:09,814 --> 02:21:11,481
Perhaps I hoped it.

1469
02:21:11,648 --> 02:21:14,981
It's very touching,
all this about P.

1470
02:21:17,189 --> 02:21:20,773
Then you've probably
misunderstood the whole thing.

1471
02:21:20,939 --> 02:21:24,439
Shall we get the story over
and done with?

1472
02:21:52,564 --> 02:21:54,606
Don't.

1473
02:21:55,814 --> 02:21:57,898
I wanna see you.

1474
02:21:58,064 --> 02:21:59,064
Don't.
- Why?

1475
02:21:59,231 --> 02:22:00,689
Please, don't.
- Why not?

1476
02:22:00,856 --> 02:22:04,398
No. No, I have a wound.

1477
02:22:04,564 --> 02:22:06,564
I have a wound.
- It doesn't matter.

1478
02:22:06,731 --> 02:22:10,606
No, you don't understand.
- I have that thing with my ear.

1479
02:22:10,773 --> 02:22:13,439
I'm so ashamed.

1480
02:22:49,773 --> 02:22:51,856
Do you like me?

1481
02:22:55,439 --> 02:22:57,439
You're so beautiful.

1482
02:24:35,024 --> 02:24:37,774
There's one thing
I don't understand.

1483
02:24:38,607 --> 02:24:41,315
Did she know what you did
for a living?

1484
02:24:41,482 --> 02:24:46,649
P was very discreet
and a girl of few words.

1485
02:24:48,149 --> 02:24:50,440
Oddly, although I worked
strange hours,

1486
02:24:50,607 --> 02:24:52,482
she never asked about my work.

1487
02:24:54,232 --> 02:24:57,065
But one day she had a question.

1488
02:24:58,690 --> 02:25:00,315
Joe.

1489
02:25:05,357 --> 02:25:09,190
Why did you start
coming to my basketball matches?

1490
02:25:11,274 --> 02:25:13,940
It wasn't a coincidence, was it?

1491
02:25:19,524 --> 02:25:22,482
No, it wasn't a coincidence.

1492
02:25:26,274 --> 02:25:28,940
I didn't tell you because I...

1493
02:25:29,107 --> 02:25:32,107
I thought you'd be upset...

1494
02:25:33,482 --> 02:25:36,357
and that you'd get angry at me.

1495
02:25:36,524 --> 02:25:39,024
I won't get angry-

1496
02:25:43,565 --> 02:25:45,690
What I do...

1497
02:25:47,232 --> 02:25:49,899
My job isn't a normal job.

1498
02:25:50,065 --> 02:25:52,190
It's not legal.

1499
02:25:52,357 --> 02:25:55,232
No one in my family
does anything legal.

1500
02:26:00,899 --> 02:26:05,315
A man that's helped me in my business
suggested that I watched you.

1501
02:26:08,232 --> 02:26:12,524
The plan was that I...
I should look at you

1502
02:26:12,690 --> 02:26:16,982
to see whether one day I could
use you in my work.

1503
02:26:17,149 --> 02:26:20,107
I should make friends with you

1504
02:26:20,274 --> 02:26:23,482
because I knew you didn't
have a mother or a father.

1505
02:26:23,649 --> 02:26:25,482
What's wrong with that?

1506
02:26:25,649 --> 02:26:29,232
Don't you see
how evil that plan was?

1507
02:26:29,399 --> 02:26:33,107
I felt terrible.
- You shouldn't have.

1508
02:26:33,274 --> 02:26:35,232
Why not?

1509
02:26:38,024 --> 02:26:40,440
Because if you hadn't...

1510
02:26:42,399 --> 02:26:44,649
we'd never have met.

1511
02:26:49,440 --> 02:26:53,649
I'd like to go with you
to work next time.

1512
02:26:53,815 --> 02:26:55,232
No.

1513
02:27:04,274 --> 02:27:05,815
Will you think about it?

1514
02:27:05,982 --> 02:27:07,357
No.
- Yes.

1515
02:27:07,524 --> 02:27:08,565
No.
- Yes.

1516
02:27:08,982 --> 02:27:11,899
She didn't take no
for an answer.

1517
02:27:12,065 --> 02:27:14,315
No, of course not.

1518
02:27:14,482 --> 02:27:17,899
How do you keep a wave
upon the sand?

1519
02:27:20,190 --> 02:27:25,690
And in the throes of love,
I was weak and no match for her.

1520
02:27:28,774 --> 02:27:32,399
With the risk
of being too clever for myself,

1521
02:27:32,565 --> 02:27:37,024
social inheritance
is an irrefutable fact.

1522
02:27:38,399 --> 02:27:42,649
If anyone knew about the laws
of the street, it must've been P.

1523
02:27:43,857 --> 02:27:47,565
You're more right than you know.

1524
02:28:07,608 --> 02:28:10,025
Let's shoot the fucker.
- No, no!

1525
02:28:10,191 --> 02:28:13,316
Stop! Stop!

1526
02:28:16,691 --> 02:28:19,066
We don't use firearms.

1527
02:28:20,233 --> 02:28:24,025
I'd like to have the gun.
- The others have weapons, too.

1528
02:28:25,483 --> 02:28:27,025
Well, I didn't know that,

1529
02:28:27,191 --> 02:28:29,108
but in any case,
you're not to have one.

1530
02:28:30,233 --> 02:28:31,900
But guns aren't dangerous.

1531
02:28:32,066 --> 02:28:34,483
It depends on how you use them.

1532
02:28:34,650 --> 02:28:36,108
Yes, exactly.

1533
02:28:36,275 --> 02:28:37,775
I wasn't going to shoot him.

1534
02:28:38,816 --> 02:28:40,983
We wouldn't have gotten
any money out of him that way.

1535
02:28:41,150 --> 02:28:43,025
Can I have the gun?

1536
02:28:47,650 --> 02:28:49,358
Thank you.

1537
02:29:08,900 --> 02:29:10,941
You're evil.

1538
02:29:14,941 --> 02:29:19,025
And now I'm afraid
one of those coincidences

1539
02:29:19,191 --> 02:29:24,358
you have such a hard time with
occurred with a very special person.

1540
02:29:25,608 --> 02:29:28,275
It was P's job to take us
to the debtors,

1541
02:29:28,441 --> 02:29:30,566
so until I saw the name
on the door,

1542
02:29:30,691 --> 02:29:33,066
I had no idea
whose house we were at.

1543
02:29:35,441 --> 02:29:39,900
This is Acer siccharium.

1544
02:29:40,066 --> 02:29:42,483
Saccharinum.
- Saccharinum, yeah, that.

1545
02:29:42,650 --> 02:29:43,816
I said that.

1546
02:29:52,941 --> 02:29:54,775
Are you sure
this is the right place?

1547
02:29:54,941 --> 02:29:55,691
Yeah.

1548
02:30:02,775 --> 02:30:08,441
I was thinking maybe it's time for
you to do this one on your own.

1549
02:30:09,358 --> 02:30:10,650
Yeah?

1550
02:30:12,566 --> 02:30:15,566
Thank you, Joe.
- I don't want anything destroyed,

1551
02:30:16,525 --> 02:30:18,816
and I don't want anybody hurt.

1552
02:30:18,983 --> 02:30:24,233
Okay? You just show yourself and
offer him a reasonable payment plan.

1553
02:30:24,400 --> 02:30:29,025
If you say so, of course
that's how I'll do it.

1554
02:30:44,275 --> 02:30:46,858
Whether the feeling
when I saw Jerome again was love,

1555
02:30:47,025 --> 02:30:48,650
I couldn't say.

1556
02:30:51,608 --> 02:30:54,191
But it was a feeling...

1557
02:30:54,358 --> 02:30:57,066
and far stronger than I liked.

1558
02:31:08,275 --> 02:31:12,191
I was actually
walking home through the alley here.

1559
02:31:12,358 --> 02:31:14,650
Your two neighborhoods
are totally different,

1560
02:31:14,816 --> 02:31:18,191
but still so close together
that the shortest route

1561
02:31:18,358 --> 02:31:22,358
from Jerome's house towards
the center was through the alley.

1562
02:31:29,316 --> 02:31:31,316
Hello!

1563
02:31:31,483 --> 02:31:35,358
How did it go?
- Brilliant.

1564
02:31:35,566 --> 02:31:38,650
Yeah, really well.

1565
02:31:38,816 --> 02:31:41,400
I made a reasonable payment plan
like you told me to.

1566
02:31:41,566 --> 02:31:46,441
How did he look?
- Scared.

1567
02:31:46,608 --> 02:31:48,983
How old did he look?

1568
02:31:49,150 --> 02:31:52,483
I don't know. Ancient?

1569
02:32:12,316 --> 02:32:16,066
Jerome was to pay
off his debt in six payments.

1570
02:32:16,233 --> 02:32:18,983
Every time P
went to Jerome to collect,

1571
02:32:19,150 --> 02:32:23,900
I'd pace around restlessly
until she was back home again.

1572
02:32:26,191 --> 02:32:29,484
I even had to find my mother's
sad old solitaire cards

1573
02:32:29,651 --> 02:32:32,692
in order to make the hours pass.

1574
02:32:40,109 --> 02:32:41,984
Each night I was less reassured

1575
02:32:42,151 --> 02:32:45,192
by her coming home
than the night before.

1576
02:32:45,359 --> 02:32:48,609
The question of whether jealousy is
the fear of sharing

1577
02:32:48,776 --> 02:32:52,067
or the fear of losing
was of little interest to me.

1578
02:32:52,234 --> 02:32:55,359
But yes, it was a fact
that this unworthy feeling

1579
02:32:55,526 --> 02:33:00,234
I had managed to suppress
for so long was creeping up on me.

1580
02:33:03,067 --> 02:33:05,817
The evening she was
to collect the final payment,

1581
02:33:05,984 --> 02:33:07,817
she didn't kiss me.

1582
02:33:07,984 --> 02:33:10,317
I took it to be forgetfulness,

1583
02:33:10,484 --> 02:33:14,401
but the hours passed,
and she didn't return.

1584
02:33:21,484 --> 02:33:26,692
Every time I saw car lights,
I thought it was P being driven home.

1585
02:34:25,234 --> 02:34:27,317
So the next morning I took a trip

1586
02:34:27,484 --> 02:34:30,651
to the round hills
just outside of town

1587
02:34:30,817 --> 02:34:34,192
that I visited with my school class
when I was 12,

1588
02:34:34,359 --> 02:34:37,817
to say a symbolic goodbye.

1589
02:34:41,442 --> 02:34:44,151
I had decided to flee.

1590
02:34:44,317 --> 02:34:48,817
I couldn't stay in this town
with her and him.

1591
02:34:48,984 --> 02:34:53,276
I had cowardly made a plan
to escape and head south.

1592
02:34:53,442 --> 02:34:54,776
Like from some ice age

1593
02:34:54,942 --> 02:34:58,109
I didn't have the guts
to turn around and face.

1594
02:34:59,276 --> 02:35:03,484
But the goodbye was sad
and strangely unfulfilling.

1595
02:35:03,651 --> 02:35:07,609
And something called me on to
seek further up the mountain.

1596
02:36:31,151 --> 02:36:33,734
I understand dictators
who commit murder.

1597
02:36:36,692 --> 02:36:39,567
What was Hitler,
when it all boils down,

1598
02:36:39,734 --> 02:36:43,734
other than a man to whom society
gave free reins?

1599
02:36:46,276 --> 02:36:49,567
Well, that was
just what we were missing.

1600
02:36:49,734 --> 02:36:53,567
You understand racists,
you have a soft spot for pedophiles,

1601
02:36:53,734 --> 02:36:56,651
and, of course,
now at the finishing line,

1602
02:36:56,817 --> 02:36:58,567
you have to sympathize

1603
02:36:58,734 --> 02:37:01,360
with the greatest mass
murderers of history.

1604
02:37:01,527 --> 02:37:03,777
What I mean is...

1605
02:37:05,443 --> 02:37:07,985
It's said to be difficult
to take someone's life.

1606
02:37:08,193 --> 02:37:12,027
I would've said
that it's more difficult not to

1607
02:37:12,193 --> 02:37:15,985
when, as a dictator or as me,

1608
02:37:16,152 --> 02:37:18,527
you've nothing to lose.

1609
02:37:20,860 --> 02:37:22,110
For a human being,

1610
02:37:22,277 --> 02:37:25,485
killing is the most
natural thing in the world.

1611
02:37:25,652 --> 02:37:27,902
We're created for it.

1612
02:37:30,360 --> 02:37:32,027
Wonderful.

1613
02:38:22,735 --> 02:38:24,277
No, get off!

1614
02:38:34,485 --> 02:38:36,652
Fireman's grip.

1615
02:42:22,653 --> 02:42:27,194
Fill all my holes, please.

1616
02:42:51,861 --> 02:42:54,611
I still don't know
why the gun didn't work.

1617
02:42:54,778 --> 02:42:59,278
I did check to make sure that there
were bullets in the magazine.

1618
02:42:59,444 --> 02:43:02,111
It simply malfunctioned.

1619
02:43:02,278 --> 02:43:04,861
Just like Bond's Beretta.

1620
02:43:05,028 --> 02:43:08,111
I think I know enough to say
that even if you had rounds

1621
02:43:08,278 --> 02:43:10,278
in the magazine
of the Walther PPK,

1622
02:43:10,444 --> 02:43:13,944
if you'd taken off the safety,

1623
02:43:14,111 --> 02:43:16,861
you cannot shoot
until you've racked the gun.

1624
02:43:17,819 --> 02:43:20,194
You pull and release

1625
02:43:20,361 --> 02:43:22,611
the sliding mechanism.

1626
02:43:22,819 --> 02:43:24,819
And P hadn't done it
because as she said,

1627
02:43:24,986 --> 02:43:27,611
she had no intention
of shooting the man.

1628
02:43:29,778 --> 02:43:32,778
I don't know about Bond,
but I assume it has to be apparent

1629
02:43:32,944 --> 02:43:34,444
from his books and his films

1630
02:43:34,611 --> 02:43:38,903
that you have
to rack an automatic pistol.

1631
02:43:40,194 --> 02:43:41,903
Of course, you're right.

1632
02:43:42,903 --> 02:43:46,569
I've seen it in films
a thousand times.

1633
02:43:51,486 --> 02:43:52,653
It's morning.

1634
02:43:55,278 --> 02:43:58,903
The snow is gone.
- So the sun must be up?

1635
02:44:00,111 --> 02:44:02,028
Yes, there is sun.

1636
02:44:03,361 --> 02:44:05,319
How can you see it?

1637
02:44:06,361 --> 02:44:10,944
This alley's located so that you
never get direct sunlight here,

1638
02:44:11,111 --> 02:44:15,611
but I can see a small reflection
on the building on the other side.

1639
02:44:22,361 --> 02:44:26,153
I've never managed to figure
out where it comes from.

1640
02:44:26,944 --> 02:44:31,861
It must be some interplay
between windows and towers

1641
02:44:32,028 --> 02:44:35,153
and high buildings.

1642
02:44:37,778 --> 02:44:42,903
It's not much, but it's the sun
you get here at my place.

1643
02:44:47,028 --> 02:44:48,778
It's beautiful.

1644
02:44:58,944 --> 02:45:00,153
In the beginning,

1645
02:45:00,319 --> 02:45:02,153
you said that your only sin

1646
02:45:02,319 --> 02:45:05,486
was that you asked
more of the sunset.

1647
02:45:07,069 --> 02:45:11,028
Meaning, I suppose, that you wanted
more from life than was good for you.

1648
02:45:13,736 --> 02:45:17,444
You were a human being
demanding your right,

1649
02:45:17,611 --> 02:45:19,153
and more than that,

1650
02:45:19,319 --> 02:45:22,694
you were a woman
demanding her right.

1651
02:45:25,986 --> 02:45:28,694
Does that pardon everything?

1652
02:45:30,069 --> 02:45:34,153
Do you think if two men were to
walk down a train looking for women,

1653
02:45:34,903 --> 02:45:38,069
do you think anybody would have
raised an eyebrow,

1654
02:45:38,278 --> 02:45:41,111
or if a man had led the life you had?

1655
02:45:42,778 --> 02:45:47,361
And the story about Mrs. H.
would've been extremely banal

1656
02:45:47,528 --> 02:45:48,861
if you'd been a man.

1657
02:45:50,069 --> 02:45:52,611
And your conquest
would have been a woman.

1658
02:45:53,611 --> 02:45:58,236
When a man leaves his children
because of desire,

1659
02:45:58,903 --> 02:46:01,694
we accept it with a shrug,
but you as a woman,

1660
02:46:02,153 --> 02:46:04,612
you had to take on a guilt,

1661
02:46:04,945 --> 02:46:07,362
a burden of guilt
that could never be alleviated.

1662
02:46:11,362 --> 02:46:14,820
Your abortion was legal,
but more than anything else,

1663
02:46:14,987 --> 02:46:18,987
it was a punishment
you inflicted upon yourself.

1664
02:46:20,112 --> 02:46:23,362
And all in all,
all the blame and guilt

1665
02:46:23,529 --> 02:46:26,070
that piled up over the years
became too much for you,

1666
02:46:26,237 --> 02:46:28,237
and you reacted aggressively,

1667
02:46:28,404 --> 02:46:31,404
almost like a man, I have to say,
and you fought back.

1668
02:46:32,695 --> 02:46:34,070
You fought back
against the gender

1669
02:46:34,237 --> 02:46:38,362
that had been oppressing
and mutilating and killing you

1670
02:46:38,529 --> 02:46:43,029
and billions of women
in the name of religion or ethics,

1671
02:46:43,195 --> 02:46:46,445
or God knows what.

1672
02:46:49,487 --> 02:46:52,404
But I wanted
to kill a human being.

1673
02:46:55,820 --> 02:46:57,820
But you didn't.

1674
02:46:59,779 --> 02:47:02,195
Because of a chance event.

1675
02:47:02,362 --> 02:47:04,404
You call it a chance event,

1676
02:47:05,904 --> 02:47:08,695
I call it subconscious resistance.

1677
02:47:08,862 --> 02:47:11,112
On the surface you wanted to kill,

1678
02:47:11,945 --> 02:47:14,362
but deep down,
you celebrated human worth

1679
02:47:15,404 --> 02:47:17,112
in a veil of forgetfulness

1680
02:47:17,279 --> 02:47:21,779
draped itself over your
knowledge of how to rack a gun.

1681
02:47:24,154 --> 02:47:26,445
Although all this
sounds frighteningly close

1682
02:47:26,612 --> 02:47:29,570
to the clichés of our times...

1683
02:47:29,737 --> 02:47:34,695
and I'm predisposed to knock
holes in your arguments...

1684
02:47:36,362 --> 02:47:38,529
I'm too tired.

1685
02:47:38,695 --> 02:47:39,987
Well, that's good.

1686
02:47:43,570 --> 02:47:45,612
Why don't you lay down?

1687
02:47:47,904 --> 02:47:49,695
Yes.

1688
02:48:01,029 --> 02:48:03,695
Let me just say that
telling my story

1689
02:48:04,737 --> 02:48:07,737
as you insisted, or permitted,

1690
02:48:09,612 --> 02:48:12,237
has put me at ease.

1691
02:48:13,737 --> 02:48:19,487
At this moment,
my addiction is very clear to me.

1692
02:48:21,862 --> 02:48:23,779
And I've come to a decision.

1693
02:48:26,320 --> 02:48:33,029
Even though only one in a million,
as my dubious therapist said,

1694
02:48:34,279 --> 02:48:38,487
succeed in mentally,

1695
02:48:38,654 --> 02:48:40,862
bodily,

1696
02:48:41,029 --> 02:48:43,237
and in her heart

1697
02:48:43,404 --> 02:48:48,570
ridding herself
of her sexuality...

1698
02:48:48,737 --> 02:48:51,279
this is now my goal.

1699
02:48:52,029 --> 02:48:55,029
But is that a life worth living?

1700
02:48:57,737 --> 02:49:00,737
It's the only way I can live it.

1701
02:49:04,570 --> 02:49:08,362
I will stand up against all odds...

1702
02:49:12,987 --> 02:49:16,404
just like a deformed tree on a hill.

1703
02:49:24,487 --> 02:49:28,987
I will muster
all of my stubbornness...

1704
02:49:32,487 --> 02:49:34,654
my strength...

1705
02:49:36,862 --> 02:49:39,570
my masculine aggression.

1706
02:49:41,862 --> 02:49:45,445
But most of all I want
to say thanks

1707
02:49:45,612 --> 02:49:50,237
to my new and maybe first friend.

1708
02:49:50,404 --> 02:49:53,279
Thank you, Seligman...

1709
02:49:54,945 --> 02:49:58,320
who perhaps is happy
when all is said and done.

1710
02:50:05,404 --> 02:50:07,987
I'm happy at any rate

1711
02:50:08,154 --> 02:50:10,237
that the shot didn't go off

1712
02:50:10,404 --> 02:50:13,154
and made me a murderer.

1713
02:50:18,820 --> 02:50:21,612
If I may, I'd like to sleep now.

1714
02:50:25,654 --> 02:50:28,279
I'll make sure
you won't be disturbed.

1715
02:50:31,279 --> 02:50:34,487
And when you wake up,
maybe we could

1716
02:50:34,654 --> 02:50:37,738
discuss your future if you'd like.

1717
02:50:46,571 --> 02:50:49,988
In your new life,

1718
02:50:50,155 --> 02:50:52,863
would you consider
seeking out your son?

1719
02:50:55,696 --> 02:50:57,696
It's possible.

1720
02:51:02,030 --> 02:51:04,113
Good night, Joe.

1721
02:51:05,488 --> 02:51:07,363
Good night, Seligman.

1722
02:52:47,488 --> 02:52:49,196
No!

1723
02:52:51,530 --> 02:52:54,280
But you,
you fucked thousands of men.