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ÇáÕÝ ÇáÓÇÈÚ.
íÈÏæ ÇÝÖá ÈßËíÑ ãä ÇáÕÝ ÇáÓÇÏÓ.
íÊäåÏåÐÇ ÇãÑ íÊÚáÞ È ÌÑíÛ. áÇ ÇÑì ÇáÛÑÖ ãä æÌæÏí åäÇ.
áÇäå íÇ ÑæÏÑíß, åÐÇ ÍÏË íÊÚáÞ ÈÇáÚÇÆáÉ,
æ ÓæÇÁ ÇÚÌÈß Çã áã íÚÌÈß, you're ÇäÊ ÌÒÁ ãä ÚÇÆáÉ åíÝáí.
ÇÌá. áåÐÇ ÇáÓÈÈ æáÇääÇ ÏÝÚäÇ Ëãä ÊÐßÑÊß ÇíÖÇ.
ÑÌá ÇáÇÐÇÚÉ: ÇÑíÏ Çä ÇÚØí ÊÍíÉ ßÈíÑÉ Çåá Èßã Ýí ÇÌÊãÇÚ æíÓÊ ãæÑ ááÕÝ ÇáÓÇÈÚ!
ÓäÉ ÌÏíÏÉ ááÈÏÇíÉ ÇáÏÑÇÓíÉ.
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ÑÇæáí! ÌÑíÛ!
(íÊÕÇÝÍÇä ÈÔÏÉ)
(íØÑÞÚÇä)
ÍÑßÇÊ ÓÍÑíÉ! ÍÑßÇÊ ÓÍÑíÉ ááÇÎÊÝÇÁ!
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ÇÌá ÝÞØ ÇÐÇ ßÇäÊ ÇáÎÏÚÉ ÊÌÚá ÇáÇÔíÇÁ ÊÎÊÝí.
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ÇäÊ áÇ ÊÑíÏ Çä ÊßÔÝ ÇÝÖá Ííáß ÇãÇã ÇáÚÇãÉ.
ÇÐä ßíÝ ßÇä ÇáÕíÝ
åÐÇ íÈÏæ ÞÇÓíÇ ÌÏÇ.
åÐÇ ÇáÔíÁ ÇáæÍíÏ ÇáÐí ÍÕá
Çäí æÕáÊ áãÓÊæì ÇÞá ãä ÇáÐá.
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ÇáæáÏ ÇáÌÏíÏ ÌíÑãí ÈäÏá.
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ÚíÏ ÓÚíÏ, ÊÇíáæÑ! 5 ÓäæÇÊ ãä ÇáÔÈÇÈ.
ÇÊãäí Çä Êßæä ÍÝáÊß ãÌÏíÉ ááÍÖæÑ.
ÑÇæáí, ÊæÞÝ Úä ÓÍÈí ááÇÓÝá!
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åí Ýí ÕÝ ßá ÇáäÌæã áßÑÉ ÇáÞÏã,
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ÇáÑÌÇÁ ãä ÇáÌãíÚ, ÇÌáÓæÇ äÍä áÏíäÇ ãÞÇÚÏäÇ.
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ÍÓäÇ!ÈÕÑÇÍÉ, ÇÚÊÞÏ Çäí ÐÇåÈ ááÊÒáÌ ÇáÇä.
ÇÊãäì Çä ÊÈÇÑßí áí æÇáÏß ÇáÊÑÝíÚÉ ÇáÊí äÇáåÇ ÈÇáäíÇÈÉ Úäí!
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ÝÊÇÉ Èí åÐå ÇáãÄåáÇÊ ÈÚíÏÉ Úä ãÈÊÛÇäÇ ÚÒíÒí ÌÑíÌæÑí,.
åí ÌÏíÏÉ æåí áíÓÊ ÈÚíÏÉ Úä ãÈÊÛì ÇÍÏ ÍÊì åÐå ÇááÍÙÉ.
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Ýåí ÇáÇä.
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ÇÐÇ ßäÊ æÇËÞÇ ÇØáÈ ãäåÇ ÇáÊÒáÌ ãÚÇß.
ãä Çáããßä Çä ÇÝÚá.
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ÇßÑÑ, ßá ÔíÁ ÓæÝ íßæä ÌíÏÇ.
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Úáí ÇáÐåÇÈ, Çãí. áÇÍÞÇ, Çãí.
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ÇåáÇ ÈÚæÏÊßã.
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ÇäÇ ÇæÇÝÞ.
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Çäå áí!
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ÇäÊÇ ÊÚÑÝ, Çäí ÇÞæì ãäß, ÌÑíÛ åíÝáí.
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áäÌÚá ßá ÔíÁ æÇÖÍ.
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áÇ ÊäÓì Úíäí Úáíß íÇ ÇíÇåÇ ÇáÔÞí åíÝáí.
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ãä Çáããßä Çä íÓãÚß.
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(íÖÑÈ ÇáØÈá ÈÕæÊ ÚÇáí)
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åæ íäÇã Ýí ÇÛáÈ ÇáÇÍíÇä ÚäÏ æÕæá ÇáãäÒá.
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Çáíæã, ãÌáÓ ÇáÊÎØíØ ÇáÇÓÊÔÇÑí æÇáãÏäí ÞÇã ÈÃÈÊÏÇÚ ÝßÑÉ ÌÏíÏÉ æãÈÏÚÉ
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ÇÎÝÖ ÕæÊß ÇíÇåÇ ÇáÞÑÏ ÔÈíå ÇáÌÈäÉ ÇáäÊäÉ!
ãÏíäÉ æíÓÊ ãæÑ ããáæÄÉ Úä ÈßÑÉ ÇÈíåÇ ÈÇáãæÇåÈ ÇáÌãíáÉ.
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ÓæÝ Êßæä åÐå åí ÝÑÕÊäÇ ÇáßÈíÑÉ ááÊÍØíã!
Çå , Çå, ÇäÊÙÑ áÍÙÉ.
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Úáì Çãá Çääí ÓÃÞæã Èí ÇÚØÇÆßã ãÌÇá áßí ÊáãÓæÇ ØÈæáí åååååå!
ÔÇåÏ æÊÚáã ÇäÇ ÏæÏÉ ÇáÇÑÖ!
åíí, ÇäÇ ßäÊ ÇÝßÑ íÌá ÚáíäÇ Çä äÞæã ÈÇáãäÇÝÓÉ Ýí ÈÑäÇãÌ ÇáãæÇåÈ.
ÇäÇ ÓÃÞæã ÈÚãá ÚÑÖí ÇáÓÍÑí æ ÇäÊ ÓæÝ Êßæä ãÓÇÚÏí ÇáÔÎÕí
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áä ÇÞæã ÈÝÚáåÇ ÍÊì áæ æÕáÊ ÇáÕÝ ÇáËÇãä.
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ÇäÇ ÚãÑí 3 ÓäæÇÊ ÝÞØ.
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áÇ ÔíÁ! áÞÏ ÎÑÈ áí ÞÑÕí ÇáÎÇÕ ÈÇáÚÇÈ ÇáÝíÏíæ.
Çæå! åæ áã íÞã Èí Çí ÔíÁ ÈÇáÚãÏ , ÇáíÓ ßÐáß íÇ ÚÒíÒí¿?
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ãÇäí: ÇäÇ Ýí ÇáËÇáËÉ ÝÞØ!
ÍÓäÇ , áäÐåÈ íÇ ÚÒíÒí , ÇÊÑíÏ ÈÓßæíÊÉ ÇÎÑì.?
ÌÑíÛ: åÐÇ ÛíÑ ÚÇÏá.
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æÇäÇ ÇáæÍíÏ ÇáÐí íÞæãæä Èáæãå Úáì ßá ÔíÁ ÊÞÑíÈÇ.
ÇäÇ ÇÊÓÃá ãÊì íãßäääí ÇíÌÇÏ ÚÇÆáÉ ÊÍÈäí æÊÑíÏäí ÈÔßá ÕÇÏÞ.
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ÇÇáåäÏ ÑÇÆÚÉ. åí ÚÈÇÑÉ Úä ÌæåÑÉ ÌäæÈ ÇÓíÇ
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(ÇáÇØÝÇá íÕÑÎæä)
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ÇÚØÊ ÇäØÈÇÚÇ ÌíÏÇ ÚäÏåÇ.
ÇÖÑÈ ÇáÍÏíÏ æåæì ÍÇãí.
ÓæÝ ÊÑì.
ÚäÏ ÑÌæÚß ãä ÇáåäÏ,
ÓæÝ Êßæä ãÚí.
ÔíÑÇÌ: ÇäÇ ÇÊãäì Çä Êßæä Êáß ÍÞíÞÉ íÇ ÌÑíÌæÑí.
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ÇÍÊÌÊåã ÈÇáÛÑÝÉ ãä ÇÌá ãÚÏÇÊí ÇáÌÏíÏÉ.
ãä Çíä áß ÈÇáäÞæÏ áÐáß?
ÇäÊÇ ÊÚÑÝ, ÌíÈÉ ÇáÇã.
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ÇäÊ ÌíÏ ÇáÇä. áÇ ÇÝÖá ãä Ðáß.
áÇ ÇÑíÏ Çä ÇÏÎá Çáì ÇáßäíÓÉ æÇäÇ ããáÄ ÈÇáÈÑÇÒ Úáì ÈäØÇáí.
ÍÓäÇ, áÇ ÊäÓì , áÇ íãßäß Çä ÊÊÎØì ÍÇÌÒ ÇáßäíÓÉ íÊæÌÈ Úáíß ÇáÏÎæá.
áÇ, áä ÇÏÎá æÇäÇ ÈåÐå ÇáÍÇáÉ.
ÍÓäÇ.
: åæ ÌÚáåã ßáåã åßÐÇ
ÇÐåÈ åíÇ.
ßá ÔíÁ íÔÚ æíáãÚ
ßá ÇáãÎáæÞÇÊ ÚÙíãÉ æÕÛíÑÉ
ßá ÇáÇãæÑ ÚÙíãÉ æÍßíãÉ
ãÇÐÇ ÊÝÚá åíÇ ÇÐåÈ? ÇÐåÈ!
Çááå Çáæáí ÌÚáåã ßáåã.......
: ÇáÑÌÇÁ ÞæãæÇ ÈÇáÌáæÓ.
ÇÓãÍáí ÈÇáÞæá íÇáå ãä Úãá äÈíá ÇáÐí ÊÞæã Èå
áÑÄíÉ ÇáßËíÑ ãä ÇáæÌæå ÇáãÈÊÓãÉ åäÇ.
ÇáÇãåÇÊ æÇáÇÈÇÁ..
ÍÓäÇ, áÞÏ æÞÝäÇ.
åíÇ! áÞÏ æÞÝäÇ!
ßá ÔÎÕ ÓíÑì ÇáßÇåä æÍÇä ÏæÑäÇ.
ÇáäÇÓ íäÙÑæä ÇáíäÇ, åíÇ?
áÐáß åíÇ äÐåÈ.
ÊÚÇáæÇ.
ÈÑÇÇÇÇÒ!
áÞÏ ÊÛæØ Ýí ÈäØÇáå!!!!!!!!!!!!
áÇ, Çäå áíÓ ßãÇ íÈÏæ !
Çäå áíÓ ÛÇÆØÇ, Çäå ÔíßæáÇÊÉ!
ÔíßæáÇÊÉ, ÇäÙÑæÇ. ?
ãÇÐÇ ÞáÊ ÈÎÕæÕ Çä Êßæäí ÇßËÑ ÍÖÇÑíÉ æãÏäíÉ?
ÚÐÇ ßá ãÇ ØáÈÊå!!!!
åÐå ÇáãÑÉ áÞÏ ÞãÊã ÈÊÎÑíÈåÇ ÈÔßá ÝÙíÚ
áã Çßä ãÍÑÌÇ Èí åÐÇ ÇáÔßá ãä ÞÈá!
ßáäÇ äÚÑÝ Çä ÇáÌãíÚ ßÇä ãæÌæÏÇ åäÇ!
áÇ Çãáß ÇíÉ ÝßÑÉ ßíÝ ÓÃßÊÈ Ýí ÚãæÏí åÐÇ ÇáÇÓÈæÚ.
ÇäÇ ÇÔÚÑ ÈÃäí ãÑÊÚÈÉ ÈÔßá ãÎíÝ
ÍÓäÇ, ÇäÊã ÌáÈÊã Ðáß áÇäÝÓßã.
ÇáÇä ÇäÊã ãÍÑæãæä ãä ÇáÌæáÉ ÇáÓÑíÚ ÇáÊí æÚÏÊßã ÈåÇ!
ÇäÊã ÇáÇä ÓæÝ ÊÈÞæä ØæÇá ÇáÚØáÉ ãÚ ÈÚÖßã ÇáÈÚÖ æÓæÝ ÊÌÏæä ÍáÇ ÓÑíÚÇ áÇÎÊáÇÝÇÊßã æãÔÇßáßã
æÇÐÇ áã ÊÝÚáæÇ ÇäÇ ÓÃÝÚá , æáßä ÈØÑíÞÊí.
æ ËÞæÇ Èí ÇäÊã áÇ ÊÑíÏæä Çä Çßæä ÌÒÁÇ ãä åÐÇ.
åá ÝåãÊã?
äÚã. äÚã. äÚã.
ÍÓäÇ, áäÐåÈ ÇÐÇ
æáÇ ÇÑíÏ Çí ÇÍÏ Çä íÃÊí áÒíÇÑÊäÇ åÐÇ ÇáÇÓÈæÚ ÇÝåãÊã¿¿¿.
ÝåãÊã¿?
ÇÇáãßÓÑÇÊ Ýí ÇáæÚÇÁ, ÇáËáÌ Ýí ÇáÝÑíÒÑ, ÇáßÇÓÇÊ Úáì ÇáØÇæáÉ,
ÍÝáÊß íÌÈ Çä Êßæä ÌíÏÉ.
ÍÝáÊäÇ íÇ ÇÎí..
ÇäÊÙÑ, Çæå , Çæå, äÍÊÇÌ Çáì ÌáÈ ßÑÇÓí ãä ÇáÞÈæ.
áãÇÐÇ?
Ýí ÍÇáÉ Çä ÇÑÏäÇ Çä äáÚÈ áÚÈÉ ÇáßÑÇÓí ÇáãæÓíÞíÉ.
æáßääí áã ÇáÚÈ Êáß ÇááÚÈÉ ãäÐ ßäÊ Ýí ÇáÕÝ ÇáËÇäí.
ÍÓäÇ, ÇäåÇ ÕÑÚÉ ÊÑÌÚ ÚäÏ æÕæáß Çáì ãÑÍáÉ ÇáÏÑÇÓÉ ÇáËÇäæíÉ
ÇäÊÙÑ! ÇÐåÈ æÇÌáÈ ÇáßÑÇÓí.
áÇ ÇÑíÏ Çí ÔÎÕ Çä íßæä ÛíÑ ãÊÝÇÆá ãä ÇáÍÝáÉ ÇÊÝÞäÇ¿?
Çæßí ÍÓäÇ
ÇÖÇÇÇÁÇÊ æÇÕæÇÊ ÇáÍÝáÉ
ÑæÏÑíß ÓÇÚÏäí ÇÑÌæß! ÇáÈÇÈ ÇÛáÞ
äÚã, æÓíÈÞì ãÛáÞÇ ááÇÈÏ
áÇ ÇÑíÏ ØÝáÇ Ýí ÇáãÑÍáÉ ÇáãÊæÓØÉ Çä íÞæã ÈÊãíÑ ÍÝáÊí
ãÇÐÇ¿ ÇÚÊÞÏÊ ÇäåÇ ÍÝáÊäÇ äÍä ÇáÇËäíä..!
áÇ ÇäåÇ ÍÝáÊí æÇáÇä ÇÈÞì åÇÏÆÇ æáÇ ÞãÊ ÈÑÈØß Ýí ãÌÝÝÉ ÇáãáÇÈÓ!
ÑæÏÑííííííß!
ÌÑíÌ ÇáÞÑÏ!
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íÑä åÇÊÝå
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ÑÇæáíæ ÇäÇ ãÍÊÇÌ áãÓÇÚÏÊß ÇáÇä!
ãæÓíÞì Ñæß
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ÇÏÎá ÇáÈíÊ æÊÚÇá æÇÝÊÍáí ÇáÈÇÈ!
äÚã áß Ðáß.!
ãÍÇæáÉ ÌíÏÉ ÌÑíÛ,
æáßä ßá ãÇ ÇäÊ ÝßÑÊ Èå ÞãÊ ÈÇáÊÝßíÑ Èå ÇíÖÇ..
ÚäÏãÇ ÊÕÈÍ ÝÑÞÊäÇ ÖÎãÉ ÓäÞæã ÈÚãá ÇáÍÝáÇÊ ßá áíáÉ
æáßäåÇ ÓÊßæä ÍÝáÇÊ Úáì ÇáãäÕÉ ÇáÎÇÑÌíÉ ÝÞØ!
ÑÇÆÚ!ÓæÝ äÕá ááãäÕÉ ÇáÎÇÑÌíÉ
ÇäÊ, áÇ ÊáãÓ ÇáåÇÊÝ
ÇÐÇ ÇÕÏÑ ÇÍÏßã ÕæÊÇ ÇáÍÝáÉ ãäÊåíÉ
æÇäÇ ÓÃßæä ãíÊÇ áÐÇ ÇÓßÊæ
ÇÓßÊ íÇ ÑÌá!
ÊÑÇÌÚ!
ÇÔÔ!
åááæ? ÑæÏÑíß, ÇäÇ Çãß.
åá ßá ÔíÁ ÈÎíÑ áÞÏ ÇÎÐÊ æÞÊÇ ßÈíÑ Ýí ÇáÑÏ Úáì ÇáåÇÊÝ.
äÚã ßá ÔíÁ ÈÎíÑ íÇ Çãí áÞÏ ßäÊ ÇÛÓá ÇáÕÍæä
ÍÓäÇ , ÚÒíÒí , ßäÊ ÇÑíÏ Çä ÇØãÆä Úáíß ÝÞØ æÇÞæá áß Çäí ÇÍÈß,
æ ÇäÇ ÇÓÝÉ áÇäí ßäÊ ÞÇÓíÉ Úáíßã Ýí ÇáÕÈÇÍ.
áÇ ãÔßáÉ . ãÚ ÇáÓáÇãÉ.
ÇáÇä ÇÚØäí ÌÑíÌ áÇÞæá áå ãÚ ÇáÓáÇãÉ
ÌÑíÛ¿
Çæå, Çå...
åæ áÇ íÓÊØíÚ áÇäå äÇÆã.
áÇ, ÇäÇ áÓÊ äÇÆãÇ ÇäÇ åäÇ ãÑÍÈÇ Çãí:
åÇí , ÑæÏÑíß.
åÇí, ÍÈíÈí, åá ßá ÔíÁ ÈÎíÑ?
áãÇ ÇäÊÇ äÇÆã ÈÔßá ãÈßÑ?
ÈÕÑÇÍÉ, ÇäÇ áã Çßä äÇÆãÇ ÇäÇ ßäÊ Ýí ÇáÞÈæ ÈÇáÇÓÝá.
ÇáÞÈæ¿ æáßä áãÇ ÇäÊÇ Ýí Ðáß ÇáãßÇä åá ãä Çáããßä Çä ÊÎÈÑäí
ÇáÇ íÌÈ Úáíß Çä Êßæä Ýí ÇáÇÚáì ãÓÊßÚÇ ãÚí íÇ ÇÎí?
äÚã, ÑæÏÑíß , ÇäÇ ÇÑíÏ Ðáß, ÊÚÇá Çáí ÇáÇÓÝá æÎÐäí?
ÇáÇä.
ÇäÇ ÇÚÊÞÏ ÇäåãÇ íÑíÏÇä Çä íÊÑÇÈØÇ æíÍÓäÇ ÚáÇÞÊåãÇ
ÇåÇ¿ åÐÇ ÌíÏ ÚÒíÒí ÌíÏ.
ÍÓäÇ, ßá ÔíÁ ÑÇÆÚ ÌÑíÛ ÇáíÓ ßÐáß¿
ÇÌá , Çãí , ßá ÔíÁ ÑÇÆÚ æ ÇäÇ ÚäÏí ÑÞãß Ýí ÍÇáÉ ßäÊ ÈÍÇÌÊß.
ÍÓäÇ, ÇÚÒÇÆí ÓæÝ äÑÇßã Ýí ÇáÛÏ, Çáì ÇááÞÇÁ æáíáÉ ÓÚíÏÉ.
ÇÓÊãÚæÇ.
ÇÐÇ ÚãáÊã Çí ÔíÁ íÍÑÌäí Çí ÔíÁ
ÝÃääí ÓæÝ.
ãÇÐÇ ÓÊÝÚá¿
ÝÞØ ÇÈÊÚÏæÇ Úä ØÑíÞí
ãÚÞÏæä.
ÇÚÊÞÏ Çäå ÚáíäÇ ÇáÕÚæÏ Çáì ÝæÞ.
åá ÊãÇÒÍäí?
áä íÊÓäì áäÇ ÇáÐåÇÈ Çáì ÍÝáÇÊ ÇáËÇäæíÉ ÇáÚÇãÉ ÍÊì ÈÚÏ 5 ÓäæÇÊ ãä ÇáÇä.
äÍä áÏíäÇ ÇáÝÑÕÉ åäÇ,
áÑÄíÉ ÇÔíÇÁ áã íÓÊØÚ Çí ØÝá ãä ÕÝæÝäÇ Çä íÔÇåÏåÇ ãä ÞÈá.
ãËá ãÇÐÇ?
ÇãæÑ ÇáãÑÇåÞíä.
ÝÞØ ÇÊÈÚ ÞíÇÏÊí æÓÊßæä ÈÎíÑ..
åíí, ÑÇÞÈ ÇáßæÚ, æ ÇÇáÈæÔÇÑ. áíÓÊ ÌíÏÉ.
åÐå ßÇäÊ ÞÑíÈÉ ÌÏÇ.
áã Çßä ÇÚÑÝ Çäß ãä Çáããßä Çä ÊÕá Çáì åäÇ.
ÑæÏÑíß: íÌÈ Úáíß ÇáÇÓÊãÇÚ Çáì ÝÑÞÊí.
äÍä äÛäí æäÚãá ÈÕæÊ ÚÇáí Ýí ÇáÍÞíÞíÉ äÍä äÌÚá ØÈáÇÊ ÇáÐä ÊäÒÝ ãä ÔÏÉ ÇáÕíÇÇÍ
ÇæÊÔ. ÇäÇ ÇÚäí, áíÓ ÍÑÝíÇ.
ÇÚÊÞÏ Çä ÇÎÇß ãÚÌÈ ÈåÇ!
íÌÈ Úáí Çä ÇÐåÈ ááÈÍË Úä ÇÕÏÞÇÆí.
ÇÌá, ÇÌá, ÇÚÑÝ.
ÊÐßíÑ! áÇ íãßäß ÇáÇÊÕÇá Èåã ÇÐÇ ßäÊ ãíÊÇ
ÕÏíÞí åÐå ÇáÍÝáÉ Úáì æÔß ÇáÇäåíÇÑ. ÇäÙÑ, íÈÏæ Úáì ÇáÝÊíÇÊ Çáãáá æÇáÎÑæÌ ãä ÇáÌæ ÇáãäÇÓÈ.
ÇäÙÑ, Çäåã íÑíÏæä ÇáÑÞÕ.
áÇ ÊØáÈ ãäåã ÇáÑÞÕ, áÇäåã ÚäÏåÇ ÓæÝ íÑÍáæä.,
æ ÚäÏåÇ ÓæÝ ÊÊÍæá Çáì Ðáß ÇáÔÎÕ ÇááÆíã
ÇáÐí íÍãá ãÓÄæáíÉ æÌæÏ ÍÝáÉ ÈÏæä ÇíÉ ÝÊíÇÊ.
ÇÐåÈ æÇØáÈ ãä ÇáÝÊíÇÊ ÇáÑÞÕ!
ÇäÊÇ ÇØáÈ.
áÇ, íÇ ÑÌá. ÇäÊÇ ÇÐåÈ æÇØáÈ ãäåã ÇáÑÞÕ
ÇäÊÇ Úáì æÔß Çä ÊÞæã ÈÐáß.
ÇäÇ áä ÇÞæã ÈÝÚáåÇ! áÞÏ ÑÃíÊß ÊÑÞÕ !
áä ÇÞæã ÈÝÚáåÇ...
åá ÞÇá ÇÍÏßã "ÑÞÕ"? åíÇ ÈäÇ äÝÚáåÇ!
ÑÇæáí, áÇ! áÇ ÊÝÚáåÇ!
åÐÇ ÇáæáÏ ãíÊ. áÇ, ÇäÊÙÑ, íÇ ÑÌá. ãÇ ÇäÊ, ÌÏíÏ?
áÇ íãßäß ÇáÚÈË ãÚ ÇáØÝá ÇáÛäæÌ, ÓÊÝÒÚ ÇáÝÊíÇÊ ÚäÏåÇ æíÈÊÚÏæä Úäß!
áä Çßáã Çãí. ÊÓÊØíÚ Çä ÊÞÊáäí.
ßæäÌÇ!
ãÇÐÇ íÝÚá?
ãä íåÊã? ÓæÝ ÇäÎÑØ ãÚåã
ÞÑíÈ ãä ÑÇÊÔá áæíÓ æ ÇíÖÇ Çãí ÑÇãíÑÇÒ
åÒæ , åÒæ, åÒæ ÇÓÌÓÇãß ÇáããÔæÞÉ åíÇ ÈÇáÏæÑ åÒæÇ ÚÒæÇ åÒæÇ
åíÇ ÇíåÇ ÇáÓäíæÑÇ ßáßã Ýí äÝÓ ÇáæÞÊ
ÇÓã ÝÊÇÊí åæí ÓíäæÑÇ
ÇäÇ ÇÞæá áßã, ÇÕÏÞÇÆí ÇäÇ ÇÚÔÞåÇ
æÚäÏãÇ ÊÑÞÕ, Çæå,íÇ ÇÎí!
åí ßÇáÇÚÕÇÑ Ýí ßá ÇáÇÌæÇÁ
ÇÞÝÒæÇ Ýí ÇáÎØ åÒæ ÇÌÓÇãßã,
åÐÇ ÚÙíã!
ÇäÇ ÇÚÑÝ! ÇÊãäì áæ ßÇäÊ Çãí åäÇ.
Çåáßã ÑÇÆÚæä ÌÏÇ ááÓãÇÍ áßã ÈÇáÞíÇã ÈåÐå ÇáÍÝáÉ ÇáÌãíáÉ.
äÚã , ÍÞíÞÉ ÑÇÆÚæä. æ ÈÊÝÓ ÇáæÞÊ áÇ ÇÑíÏåã Çä íÚÑÝæÇ äåÇÆíÇ.
íãßäß ÇáÍÏíË Úä ÊÔÇ ÊÔÇ
ÇáÊÇäÌæ æÇáæáÊÒ Çæ ÍÊì ÇáÑÇãÈÇ
ÑÞÕÉ ÇáÓíäæÑÇ áíÓ áåÇ ÚäæÇä
ÊÑÞÕ Ýí ÇáÕÝ æÊäÓì ÇáÊÊÇÈÚ áÌÓÏß ÇáäÍíá!
ÇÞÝÒ Ýí ÇáÎÙ æ åÒ ÌÓãß Ýí äÝÓ ÇáæÞÊ
Çææå!
åÒ åÒ åÒ åÒ ÌÓãß åÒ ßáå Ýí ÇáÏæÑ
ÇáÇÈ: åÇí. æÕáÊã Çáì ÇáÈÑíÏ ÇáÎÇÕ Èí ÚÇÆáÉ ÚíÝáí ÇáÑÌÇÁ ÊÑß ÑÓÇáÉ. 667 ÇáÇã: ãÑÍÈÇ íÇ ÔÈÇÈ ãÇäí ãÑíÖ æäÍä Ýí ØÑíÞäÇ Çáì ÇáãäÒá
äÑÇßã ÈÚÏ ÓÇÚÉ ÊÞÑíÈÇ.
Çæ áÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇ åæáí ÔíÊ ÇááÚäÉ!
ÇäÊ Ýí æÑØÉ ßÈíÑÉ ÇáÇä
ÇäÇ? ÇäÊÇ ßÐÈÊ Úáì Çãí ßãÇ ÇäÇ ßÐÈÊ ÊãÇãÇ.
ÇäÊ ÊÚÑÝ ãÇ åæ ÔÚæÑåÇ ÍíÇá ÇáßÐÈ ÓæÝ ÊÞÊáäÇ äÍä ÇáÇËäíä
ÇäÊ ÇÐåÈ áÛÑÝÉ ÇáãÚíÔÉ æÇäÇ ÓæÝ ÇÈÏÃ ÈÇáãØÈÎ åíÇÇÇÇ !
ÇäÇ ÇÝÖá Çä ÊÚãá ÇÍÓä ãä ÇáÇ ÊÚãá
ÇäÇ ÇÝÖá Çä áÇ ÊÑßÈäí æ ÊÍãáäí ÝæÞ ØÇÞÊí
ÚäÏãÇ ßäÊ Ýí ÚãÑß ßäÊ ÇÈÐá ÞÕÇÑì ÌåÏí áÇËÈÊ æÌæÏí
áÇ áíÓ ßÐáß ãÇÐÇ ÝÚáÊ ááæáÏ
ÇÐÇ ßÇäÊ åÐå ÇáÞÖí åíÇ ááæÕæá ááÚãÞ
ÇäÇ ÇÓÝ ÌÏÇ áä ÇÞæã ÈÊÑßß ãÑÉ ÇÎÑì
ÐåÈÊ ááØÈíÈ ÇáÑÇÆÚ ÇáÐí ÊÍÏËÊ Úäå
æåæ ÞÇá Çä ÇáÚãáíÉ ÈØíÆÉ ÌÏÇ
Çáí ÇáÇÓÝá ÇáÇÓÝá åíÇ åíÇ åíÇ ÈäÇ ááäÒá! ÍÓäÇ ÍÓäÇ åíÇ ÈäÇ.
ÌíÏÉ ÌÏÇ.
áäÐåÈ Çáì ÇáãØÈÎ
ããßä Çä äÏåä ÝæÞå.
áÇ ÇÚÑÝ ßíÝ ÇÎáØ ÇáÏåÇä!!
æÌÏÊåÇ!
ÇÑÃíÊ ¿ ßÇä ãä ÇáÌíÏ Çäí ÞãÊ ÈÃÛáÇÞ ÇáÈÇÈ Úáíß åäÇ.
ÇáÇÇä åíÇ ÈäÇ
áä äÝÚáåÇ ÇäÇ ÎÇÆÝ!
áÇ ÊÎÝ ÓäÝÚáåÇ.
ÇÑãäí Ýí ÇáÍÇæÈÉ ÇÊä ÇÑÏÊ Ðáß
ÇäÇ ÇÑÚÝ Çäß ãÊÚØÔ áÐáß
ÊÐßÑ Çä ÇÓãÇÆäÇ ãÊÔÇÈåÉ
ÇÑÃíÊ¿ áÞÏ ÞáÊ áß ÇääÇ ÓääÌÍ.
ÑæÏÑíß!
ÈÇÈ ÇáÍãÇã, áÇ íæÌÏ ÞÝá Úáì ÈÇÈ ÇáÍãÇã
ÇáÇÎÑ ßÇä Úáíå ÞÝá ÈíäãÇ åÐÇ áÇ íæÌÏ Úáíå, äÍä ãíÊÇä ÇáÇä
æÇÐÇ ÇßÊÔÝÇ...
ÌÑíÌ? ÇáÇÈ: ãÑÍÈÇ, ÔÈÇÈ
åÇí. åÇí, Çãí, ÇÈí.
åíí, ßíÝ ÍÇá ãÇäí? åá íÔÚÑ ÈÊÍÓä? ØÝá ÕÛíÑ ãÓßíä.
ÇÌá, åæ ãÊÍÓä Úä ÞÈá.
ÇáÇã: æÇæ. ÇáÈíÊ Úáì ãÇ íÈÏæ Ôßáå ãÑÊÈ æÌíÏ.
áÞÏ ÊæÞÚÊ ÝæÖì ÚÇÑãÉ Ýí ÇáÈíÊ.
Çå.
ãä ÇáÐí Çßá åÐå ÇáãßÓÑÇÊ Úáì ÇáÇÑíßÉ?
ÇÐä...
ãä ÌÇÁ ááÈíÊ Ýí äåÇíÉ ÇáÇÓÈæÚ?
ãÇÐÇ? áÇ ÇÍÏ.
ÇäÊ ÞáÊ áÇ ÇÍÏ íÇ ÇÈí áÇ ÊÚäí áÇ ÇáíÓ ßÐáß¿ .
ÇÌá ÇÌá, æáÏ ãØíÚ.
ÇÐä,
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In conclusion, without last century's technological advances,
there would be no computers, cell phones, or modern medical miracles.
And so for that, we salute and thank our ancestors
from 100 years ago.
Thank you, Holly. That was excellent work.
I think we have time for one more.
I have to say that when I read this paper
I was a bit surprised by its content.
But more than any other, this one deserves to be read out loud.
Greg?
Yay, Greg!
Just read it, Greg. All of it.
[GREG]: Okay.
"Sometimes I sit and wonder about stuff I do not know...
"Like, what the Earth was, like 100 years ago...
"Did cavemen ride on dinosaurs? Did flowers even grow?
"Did spiders rule the Earth? Were deserts filled with snow?
"There were no books or humans, so how were we to know...
"What life was like 100 years ago?"
Loser.
Now, Greg, when we talk about how important it is to recycle,
we don't mean turning in your brother's old papers.
I thought Dad helped you with this paper.
Well, actually,
Dad started writing my papers because of that paper.
I looked like an idiot!
And the girl from the roller rink? She laughed at me.
Ouch!
Just do something that changes her opinion of you.
Like, set a firecracker off in the classroom. Boom!
Chicks dig bad boys.
Well, actually I was thinking about writing her a note.
You mean like one with words on it?
I've got it all figured out.
I'm gonna pass her a note with a question on it, but it'll be anonymous.
She'll be like, "I have to know who wrote this. "
Then later, I'll walk up to her
and ask her the exact same question.
It'll blow her mind.
(WHISPERS) A note?
Do you want me to spell check it?
(WHISPERS) Just pass it to Holly.
To Holly.
(SIGHS)
(MOUTHING) Thank you.
(WHISPERS) It's from Greg.
What's going on?
Greg Heffley is passing me notes!
No, I wasn't.
"How do you get your hair to smell so beautiful?"
(ALL LAUGHING)
(SNIFFS)
[GREG]: Okay. The note was a minor setback,
but at least things are still going well with Rodrick.
It's amazing but I'm actually enjoying...
watching Löded Diper rehearse for the talent show.
Bill's taken the band to a whole new level.
(ECHOING) Somebody farted.
I got one. I got one. I got a good one. I got a good one.
(ECHOING) Somebody farted.
My dad should be happy that I'm hanging out with Rodrick.
But I don't think he really likes Bill.
I think what he's worried about is I'll turn out like Rodrick,
Manny'll turn out like me, and, eventually, we'll all turn out like Bill.
Rock and roll!
Rock on. Yeah.
[HOLLY]: Dear Greg, meet me in the art room before lunch.
There's something I want to ask you. Kiss, kiss. Holly.
Hi, Holly! I was glad to get your note.
I've been wanting a chance to talk to you.
And, hey, you like to paint. I'm kind of an artist myself.
Holly?
Ha!
(GASPS) Chirag?
You see me now, don't you? Game, set and match to Chirag Gupta!
(PANTING)
Hi, Holly. Hi, Fregley.
She thinks I'm Fregley?
That's got to hurt.
(SIGHS)
(CHATTERING)
Want to see my secret freckle?
[BOTH]: Ew!
(LAUGHING)
So the note to the girl didn't work out?
All right. Let's go. Little bro, I am taking you out.
And here are my other men.
Greg, Rodrick, I'd like you to meet my editors,
Mr. Salz and Mrs. Kohan.
Hey. Hello. Nice to meet you. Hello.
Where you boys off to?
Just taking the little brother out...
for the evening. He could use a good time.
Okay, well, be safe. And be home by 9:00.
Yeah. See you!
- Bye. - Bye. Have fun!
Good night.
Now that is impressive.
My older boy wants nothing to do with his younger brothers.
[MRS. KOHAN]: You certainly practice what you preach.
I think every mother in town should read your column.
Thanks.
Mom would kill us if she saw us eating this.
(BOTH MOANING)
(SLURPING)
(GROANING)
Brain freeze! Brain freeze!
All I can say is, get ready to have your mind blown.
We are going to have an epic night.
(GROANING)
Are you okay?
(RETCHING)
(LAUGHS) Fake vomit. You can't beat the classics.
Yeah.
Here we go. Here we go. Here he comes.
(SCREAMS)
(PANTING)
Okay. Very funny! Very funny.
[GREG]: This is sweet!
I told you.
(EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST)
(SCREAMS)
So, you know that girl who I sent the note to?
Yeah?
She thinks I'm Fregley.
(LAUGHING) Oh, man!
I mean, hey, don't take it hard.
Girls act like they're not into you when they really are.
I mean, tons of girls act like they're not into me, but they are.
I know they are. I bet she really likes you.
(FOOTSTEPS)
(WHISPERS) Check it out. Check it out.
Whoa!
(RODRICK LAUGHING)
Who's out there?
No way.
Coach Malone?
Real funny, yeah? Oh, yeah!
Well, you just messed with the wrong athlete!
Move. Move!
[MALONE]: Show yourself! Go, go!
You want to take me on? Yeah? You want to take me on?
You better bring your A game, 'cause I am a competitor!
- Come on! - [MALONE]: You will come out!
You know I'm gonna find you!
Help!
Come on.
Something tickles.
(SCREAMING)
[RODRICK]: Come on. Come on. Come on.
(YELLS)
(GREG WHIMPERING)
[MALONE]: You can't outrun me! I'm a superstar!
RODRICK: Go, go, go, go!
[MALONE]: Everywhere you go, it's me!
- (RODRICK SHRIEKS) - (MALONE GRUNTING)
Stupid carbs!
There's the mall! Come on.
I can't go much further!
(GREG PANTING)
(PANTING)
(GROWLS)
Got you!
(PEOPLE MURMURING)
[WOMAN]: Coach Malone?
"You can't outrun me! I'm a superstar!"
"Everywhere you go, it's me!"
Come on.
Oh, you boys are five minutes early. Did you have a good time?
A great time.
That is so sweet.
I just can't get over how well your boys get along.
Well, Larry, we run a pretty tight ship around here.
It's all about boundaries, rules.
Anyway, let me show you some of those Civil War re-enactment photos
I was telling you about.
So, what did you boys do?
(STUTTERS) Just hung out at the mall.
And talked about life. Nothing special.
Oh, my God.
Rodrick?
Can you explain what you're doing in this photo?
That's not me.
That's not you?
Nope.
Okay. How about these?
I can't believe that you had a party!
Greg, you told me it was a couple of kids, a band rehearsal!
Wait, Susan, you knew about this?
[SUSAN]: Yes.
Yes, I knew.
You told Mom?
I knew they had a party!
It slipped out, but I took it back!
My instincts told me you weren't being honest!
- I should've trusted my instincts. - [FRANK]: Wait!
You knew about this, but you didn't tell me about it?
I still protected you!
I threw Mom off your scent!
Great job. She has no idea!
We are supposed to be a team against them!
They were getting along so well
I let it blind me to the truth!
Why were you taking pictures?
It was so crazy that morning, I forgot we took the pictures.
So I let it slide. And I am so sorry.
Oh, God. It feels so good to get that out.
I haven't been able to look at that bathroom door for two weeks!
I knew that door had a lock on it!
And everybody was trying to make me feel like I was losing my mind!
We're just gonna let ourselves out.
I wouldn't write a column about this.
(DOOR CLOSES)
I'm going upstairs!
To a bathroom that has a lock on it
and no one can tell me that it doesn't.
I have to go talk to your father.
I will deal with you boys later.
Rodrick, I really didn't tell her!
I mean maybe, sort of, but I made a deal with her,
and we had a really good time, and...
You're my brother,
but you'll never be my friend.
(SUSAN BREATHES DEEPLY)
Your father and I have talked and we've decided on your punishment.
Greg, you're grounded for two weeks.
Also, no video games for two weeks.
Rodrick, you may only drive to and from school for the next month.
As the ringleader, you are also grounded for a month.
Mom, I'm sorry, and I won't do it again.
I know you won't.
And to make sure
we're also not allowing you to perform in the talent show.
What? No. You can't do that.
Ground me for a year, I don't care,
but you have to let me play in that show.
This could be my big break. I'm sorry.
Dad? Come on. This isn't fair. I just got Bill in the band!
Actually, Rodrick, that doesn't help your case.
Bill's kind of a jerk.
Our decision is final.
(WHISPERS) You are so dead!
[GREG]: Things have never been worse.
Our parents are super mad at us,
so we have to spend the weekend...
at my grandpa's boring retirement community.
Holly Hills thinks I'm Fregley,
and my relationship with Rodrick is at an all-time low.
So he's made it his mission to ruin my life.
Quit it!
Why don't you tell Mom? You're good at that.
Grandpa doesn't like TV.
Instead, he prefers to watch the lobby on the security channel.
I should be rehearsing right now.
Please, Grandpa. Please, can we watch a real TV show now?
TV is just a bunch of fakers.
This is real life.
It's real life. You can't beat it.
(SIGHS)
How's about we all go down to the games room?
You boys like games, don't you?
[GREG]: The games room sounds fun...
until you realize that all the games in there are from, like, the 1800s.
My grandpa's favorite is a really old board game called Gutbusters.
Now, remember, the object of the game is to read the joke card...
and all the other players have to try not to laugh.
(SNICKERS) Good luck! There is some real rib-ticklers in there!
Yeah.
You go first.
"Putting economic policy before fiscal responsibility...
"is like putting the cart before the horse"...
(LAUGHING)
That is hilarious, Grandpa! Read another one, Greg.
I'm going to go change my shirt.
Hi!
Oh, hi, Holly. What are you doing here?
I'm visiting my grandma. She just moved here.
I'm on Grandpa duty.
Listen, Greg, I'm really sorry for calling you Fregley the other day.
I don't know what happened.
I think it's the Greg and Freg part, my brain just flipped.
You called me Fregley? I had no idea.
Really?
Not really.
I heard it. It was pretty rough.
But don't worry, I have the rest of middle school to get over it.
What happened to your shirt?
Oh, my brother spit milk on me.
Let me guess, he was pretending to laugh
at something that wasn't actually funny.
How did you know?
It's in the Older Sibling Handbook.
Last week, my older sister put hair remover in my shampoo.
If I hadn't smelled something, I'd be completely bald by now!
Why would she do that?
Duh! 'Cause she's my sister.
It's part of the deal. You fight and then you get over it.
Not my brother. He hates me
and he'll never get over it.
Of course he will. He has to. He's your brother.
I also have a little sister who's spoiled rotten.
Tell me about it! My little brother ruins all my stuff,
and somehow I'm the one who ends up getting in trouble for it.
Doesn't that drive you nuts?
(SCOFFS)
[GRANDMA HILLS]: Holly! Time for dinner!
I got to go. It was cool hanging out with you.
I'll look for you tomorrow, Greg.
See you later, Fregley.
[GREG]: I thought being at Grandpa's was a punishment...
but, really, it was destiny that Holly was here, too.
My luck had finally changed.
(SNORING)
[RODRICK READING]: "I never believed in fate, or destiny,
"or whatever, until now.
"Things are finally starting to go my way!"
Rodrick, be quiet. Talk on the phone someplace else.
"I thought being at Grandpa's was a punishment...
"but, really, it was destiny that Holly was here, too.
"My luck had finally changed. "
Aww! (LAUGHS)
Give it back, Rodrick!
This stuff is priceless! No way.
Come on. Give it back!
You know what? I will give it back.
To Holly! Wait till she reads this garbage!
(THIS IS WAR PLAYING)
I don't even want to go
"I can't believe my luck!
"I finally got Holly all to myself
"without Chirag, or anyone else!"
(LAUGHING)
Give it back, Rodrick! Give it back.
No way.
Always stuck in a daydream
Can't focus on the other team
Hunted you all day and night
Now I'm ready for a fight
This is war
Yeah, yeah, yeah
This is war
Yeah, yeah, yeah
This is war
(GASPS)
'Cause I got to knock you out
Whoop!
(WOMAN SHRIEKS)
Oh!
(RODRICK LAUGHING)
(GASPS)
They say that you're the best
You gotta follow all the rest
This is war
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Record, record, record.
This is war
Yeah, yeah, yeah
This is war
I can't be your friend
'Cause I gotta knock you out
(PANTING)
(WOMAN COUGHING)
I'm in the ladies'?
(SCREAMS)
[WOMAN]: Peeping Tom! There's a Peeping Tom in there!
Peeping Tom! There's a Peeping Tom in there!
Let's get him!
What do you think you're doing in there? We'll come in and get you!
Take that, you Peeping Tom!
[WOMAN 1]: Let's get him!
[WOMAN 2]: Get out of here!
[WOMAN 3]: Stop that pervert!
[WOMAN 4]: The little whippersnapper!
I've got him! I've got him!
[WOMAN 5]: Shame on you!
[WOMAN 6]: I've got him in a headlock!
I'm not the Peeping Tom!
[WOMAN 1]: Where'd he go?
(PANTING)
(EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST)
Did he just come out of the ladies' room?
(SIGHS IN RELIEF)
[RODRICK]: Hey, Greg!
What's new? Huh?
[GREG]: Well, my life is officially over.
Now that Rodrick has that tape of me...
running around in my underwear,
he basically owns me.
(GREG GROANING)
The day of the talent show came around...
and Mom and Dad made us both go.
Something about supporting the community, or whatever.
[ROWLEY]: Scotty!
Come on!
Scotty! Come on!
You don't wanna let the magic fans down, do you?
[SCOTTY]: Go away!
Rowley, what's wrong?
My assistant, Scotty, got stage fright...
and now he doesn't wanna do the show.
Maybe Greg would help out. He can be your assistant.
What? No way!
What? Rowley is your best friend.
This is important to him. You need to do this.
It's okay, Mrs. Heffley.
Greg is just afraid that Holly Hills will think less of him.
[GREG]: Rowley.
Mom, can we talk in private? Sure.
Scotty, please.
Look... Who's this Holly Hills?
Is she your girlfriend? No!
She's just some girl who happens to be a friend
who I don't want to be humiliated in front of.
I see your point.
So is this Holly in your class?
Mom!
Okay.
Here we go.
So, are you going to make me do it?
[ROWLEY]: Please, Scotty.
No. No, I get it. I get it.
Can you at least point her out to me?
Okay, okay, I'll stop.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls,
welcome to Plainview's Most Talented!
And without further ado, Ms. Patty Farrell!
(MEMORY PLAYING)
(SINGING) Memory All alone in the moonlight
I can smile at the old days
I was beautiful then
Wow, she's really good.
I remember the time
I knew what happiness was
Let the memory live again
Touch me
It's so easy to leave me
All alone with the memory
Of my days in the sun
If you touch me...
(WHISPERS) Greg, she's cute.
She's super cute.
Mom!
Look, a new day
Has begun
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)
Oh, thank you!
Say hello to the boys and girls, Freggers.
Hello, boys and girls! I love you.
And tonight, when you are all fast asleep
I'm going to crawl through your window and give you all a big hug!
(CRYING)
Hey, you could do that. Right?
Yeah.
(SIGHS)
(YANKEE DOODLE DANDY PLAYING)
A real live nephew of my Uncle Sam
I was born on the 4th of July
I've got a Yankee Doodle sweetheart
She's my Yankee Doodle joy
Yankee doodle came to...
You can't go on without me. I started LÃ¶ded Diper. I'm the backbone!
Well, we got a new backbone now, dude. (LAUGHS)
This guy.
That's rock and roll, bro.
Did you guys see the audience? Oh, man! It's huge.
This roller-skating kid is really good!
Don't you think... (BLATHERING)
(SUSAN GASPS)
Greg! Where have you been? I've been looking all over for you.
Mom, you need to let Rodrick play in the talent show tonight.
Greg, we've been over this. He needs to learn a lesson.
His band is playing without him, and it's not fair.
And I'm sure that's very hard on him,
but I can't go back on the punishment.
Mom. Yes?
You let Rodrick play in the talent show,
I'll...
...do the magic thing with Rowley.
Really? You'd do that?
You'll be Rowley's partner, even though you said
it's totally embarrassing and humiliating?
You're willing to do that just so your brother can play?
Yes.
Come here.
I mean, how bad can it be?
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
(AUDIENCE MURMURING)
[ROWLEY WHISPERS]: Scotty was right.
There's a lot of people out there.
Just start with your opening trick, like you rehearsed at home.
Forget about all the people. Go.
(EXHALES)
Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.
I am the Remarkable Rowley, (TIMIDLY) master of illusion.
And joining me onstage is my faithful assistant, Scotty.
Greg! (SCATTERED LAUGHTER)
Greg.
Who looks a little cold. Maybe he needs a scarf.
(ALL LAUGHING)
Ew! Don't put them on me! They're still wet!
(ALL LAUGHING)
Sorry, Greg. Here's a peace offering.
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
Fly. Fly away. Be free, little friend.
(AUDIENCE GASP)
Oh. Oh.
That thing's dead.
(WHIMPERS) I think I had him in my pocket too long.
(BOTH GASP)
No hard feelings?
(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)
Keep going. We're a hit!
And now, for my grand finale,
the saw-the-lady-in-half trick!
If you will.
(WHISPERS) Push out the feet. (WHISPERS) Okay.
No trap doors. No chance of escape.
I will now miraculously saw Greg in half.
Wait. Forget it! I want out!
What are you doing?
This is the showstopper!
Good, then stop!
Ow! Ow! Ow!
Ladies and gentlemen, the Remarkable Rowley!
And Greg the Great!
That should have been me!
We killed. And I didn't have to die!
It was even better than it was in the rehearsals.
Hi. Can I have your autograph?
Sure. Sure.
Your performance was pathetic, Greg Heffley!
Only a moron would find humor in bird poop!
(DOVE COOING)
You stupid bird!
(GRUNTS ANGRILY)
Oh, my gosh. You guys did great. That was really funny.
The unitard or the performance?
Both.
Thank you, thank you! Thank you.
Just do your best, honey.
Oh, um...
(SIGHS)
Can I borrow your eye10:56 ã ý18/ý06/ý2011r?
Yeah.
Looks like you guys made up.
We're brothers.
Please welcome to the stage...
Löded Diper! Oh, yeah!
[RODRICK]: Mom, go! Get off the stage!
(ROCK BEAT PLAYING)
[BAND MEMBERS]: We are Löded Diper!
(SCREAMING)
(SINGING) You told us we were losers
And we can't do nothing right
You said we'd never make it
But just look at us tonight
All over the place!
Exploded Diper
In your face
Exploded Diper
We can't be stopped
Exploded Diper
Your head is gonna pop
Exploded Diper
You can't keep us down
We're gonna hit the fan
And rock this sleepy town
(AUDIENCE CHEERING)
[BEN]: Get up, all you haters!
Dude, they love us!
No hard feelings, right, bro?
Hey, Bill, you know what?
When we're done tonight, you're out of the band.
What?
That's rock and roll, bro.
[BOY SINGING]: Löded...
[BOY 2 SINGING]: Diper...
Löded...
Diper...
Löded...
Diper
Come here. Look.
Dad? Are we gonna tell them...
that the audience went crazy for Mom's weird dancing?
He's happy. She's happy.
I say we keep this one between the two of us, okay?
Exploded Diper
It's us, the Diper And yes, we rock
Exploded Diper
So, I just wanted to say that
you getting Mom to let me play last night was really cool.
Yeah, well, I kind of owed you.
Oh, and here.
The tape? You're giving it to me? Hey!
Don't make a big deal about it or I'll post it on YouTube, okay?
(BRAKES SCREECH)
Now get out.
Doofus.
Okay.
Later.
Butt-brain!
You know, I guess having a big brother isn't all that bad.
Maybe we don't always get along,
but I know he's gonna be there for me.
Hey, I just spilled grape juice on the couch and kind of blamed it on you.
Later.
(SIGHS)
I'll get him back.
Action!
(GASPS)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTS)
(BOTH YELLING)
(WHOOPING)
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)
Exploded Diper
All over the place!
Exploded Diper
[GREG]: Okay, it's uploaded.
In your face
Exploded Diper
[ROWLEY]: Holy cow.
This is huge! We're an Internet sensation!
[RODRICK]: Greg! You are so dead!
Exploded Diper ö